(no subject)
i fucking hate this, i hate all of this. I just want it all to dissappear or i want to dissappear. I thought things were finally looking up when me and hannah fixed things between us but then another slap in the face. Last night i came to terms with reality, ive lost my best friend, just like that i have no idea what happened but i havent' stopped crying since. I was in her room last night with a bunch of people, and every memory, every thought every laugh, every moment came flooding back into my mind. I couldn't hold back and i just started to cry i tried really hard to stop but i couldnt' so i just turned away hoping no one would notice. Then today i found hannah and kate are no longer going to be friends and now it feels like i have to choose between them and i know i shouldn't feel like that but i do, hannahs going through some things and i feel horrible that im not there for her.
It feels like i have no one except kate, she finally let go to me in the bathroom at the restaurant last night. It was a really tough, emotional night. I havne't stopped crying since. I feel pathetic. I want everything back to normal.
I want something good to happen to me, i want everything changed.
Heres to you my best friend,
just wanted to say that i miss having you around.
i miss my best friend. i miss her alot. it feels like shes given up on our friendship and that makes me give up too.
i can't explain how i feel about anything anymore, i can't put my emotions into words. all i know is that i need him