(Untitled)

[huntersdaughter]

Who: Jo Harvelle and invited guests. (Bela, Eliot, Max, Lois, Clark, Cassie, Faith, Spike S., Crowley, Kaylee, Booth, Jilly, Gabriel, Chase, Claire)
What: Hunter's Memorial
When: tl;dl for January 24th || Dusk on Tuesday January 25th (after she's invited everyone personally)
Where: The Paradisa Cemetery
Rating:

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[autophoenix]

Well. Of all the funerals she'd gone to, this definitely won points for the most interesting. She'd bundled up enough so that the cold wouldn't chill her to the bone as it was prone to doing -- it was the only way she was going to make it through the full service, however makeshift. When Jo started passing out shot glasses, an eyebrow was raised, but she didn't comment. If this was how she wanted to celebrate the life of her dead boyfriend, that was her prerogative. Everyone grieved in a different way, and no one in present company had any idea that Claire wasn't going to be feeling the kick when she downed it, so she could go through the motions for Jo's sake.

Trying to console her felt cheap. Contrived. Insulting, even. How do you console someone when you're positive that their loved one would still be alive if it weren't for you? There was no way to do it without lying to her friend's face and, well, that was something she didn't want to take on. Her life in Paradisa had been made on the foundation of the truth -- ish. But, that didn't mean she had to face up to her own mistakes for an extended period.

She wasn't the funeral type in the first place. For one, Claire never knew what to say, and it was only worse here. For another, it was always the kind of thing that got people thinking about their own mortality. People realizing that everyone would, inevitably, show up in one of those nice wooden boxes and get buried back into the Earth and all that fun stuff. But, that concept, for several years now, had been one that she didn't understand.

Usually she was the type to just walk up, pay her respects, and leave before any real tears could fall. Probably all that Petrelli blood. Whatever it was, it made sure that she drank the shot in one quick gulp, resisting the urge to grimace at the taste. Not that the beer she'd drank in high school tasted like ambrosia, but it was never paint thinner levels of gross. Still. She'd go through the motions and participate like a good friend.

When Jo began questioning people for a second round, Claire immediately ducked out of the lineup, moving to where the makeshift icebox had been made and placing her glass back in the snow. While she poured, Claire appraised the tombstone. There was no body, of course, but the castle had put its own private memorial up anyway. It was hard to say if she thought it was more meant as a warning, some kind of torturous reminder for those two weeks, or a genuine way to help them grieve. Where the castle was concerned, she wasn't sure of a lot of things.

She wasn't even sure he was coming back. Sure, everyone in the castle was convinced of this two week rule, but it was another matter entirely when she had to wait it out with three of her friends gone, waiting anxiously for every minute of those two weeks without having any experience to know that it was going to be the case for sure. Faith was a hard thing for Claire to grasp most days. So, she crouched down beside the tombstone, resting her hand on top of it and fixing it with a grim look, the kind of tenseness in her lips that said she was trying to smile but she wasn't sure she had it in her.

[autophoenix]

"I know you can't hear me. But, I don't know if I'd have it in me to say it to your face, and I need to say that I'm sorry. It shouldn't have been you. It was never supposed to be you." The tears began to threaten to come and she sucked in a deep breath, shutting her eyes to fight them back. Not in public. Not now. She'd done enough crying. Releasing the breath, she stood, fingers brushing off the edge of the tombstone like she was saying goodbye, lips finding the form of a strained smile as she turned to walk over to where Jo was finishing up with refilling glasses.

"Hey," she greeted in a sympathetic tone. Her hand found the back of Jo's arm in a gesture of comfort. "Thank you." Realizing it wasn't really clear what she was even saying thank you for, she turned to cast a look back at the tombstone. "I know you took down the memorial, but … I'm sure everyone who Sam would want to be here is here. And your speech was beautiful." Well, not exactly beautiful, but it was honest and something told her with his Brawny man look, it was precisely the kind of thing Sam would understand if he'd been able to see it.

"I'm glad you let me come." Unfortunately, as gentle and reassuring as they were, her words were making it clear that she wasn't planning on hanging around much longer.

[huntersdaughter]

She had noticed who had gone to talk to Sam's headstone and she wasn't surprised that Claire had been one of them. Even before she'd left and come back in again, Sam and Claire had been close. If anything, she was another part of the extended Winchester family. Jo was relieved that she'd shown up, mostly because she knew that it wasn't exactly a good week for Claire either. She'd known more than just Sam and she'd lost more than just one friend.

Jo had sort of lost sight of what she was doing, lost in her own thoughts when Claire's hand brought her back to the present. Glancing at her, she offered an attempt at a warm smile, "Thanks. I... I over-reacted with the flowers. I just, I couldn't keep walking past that every day."

Exhaling, she gave Claire's arm a squeeze back, moving to pull her in close against her side, "I'm glad you came."

[autophoenix]

It wasn't hard to see that there wasn't much enthusiasm in Jo's smile and Claire just nodded. There wasn't much warmth to the way she returned, out of obligation, mostly, the half-hug that Jo gave her. Claire's method of mourning was through isolation, but she'd never flinched away from offering comfort when she could. It just happened to be difficult to reconcile the two.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world. Besides," her tone took on a wry quality, "it beats hanging around in my room and moping, right?" She did a good enough job of making it sound like a joke that it was hard to take her seriously and believe that it was what she'd be doing otherwise, but … there was some truth to it. A truth that cut her pretty deep. Steph, at least, was doing the same thing. That was validating, even if it was mostly inconsequentially.

After a pause, she concluded there was one good way to get the best of both worlds. She pursed her lips a little and let her forehead crease with interest.

"The hunter thing you mentioned during your speech …" She shook her head. "What was that all about?"

[huntersdaughter]

It wasn't something that Jo minded, she could understand the lack of enthusiasm for talking about someone that had died. If she had a choice she would've just ignored it all and kept to herself. It just didn't feel like that was the smart choice to make. If she was going to be known as this girl that threw out a basket of flowers -- she at least wanted to make sure that the people that counted understood why.

"It definitely beats sulking." Exhaling, she took that moment of silence to collect her thoughts, trying to sort out what exactly she'd do now. The question that came from Claire, though, that pulled her attention.

"It's what we do, well, back home. Here it's a bit difficult when the vampires and demons are ... trapped here too."