log; complete
Who: Axel & Roxas.
What: Someone actually manages to convince Roxas not to do something crazy. Throw a party. Oh, and there is some obscure bonding tiemz, in the form of tackling and face-meet-floor.
When: May 24th, evening.
Where: Second floor hallway.
Rating: PG-13 for language and wangst.
ROXAS; He'd been standing in the hallway for a good two minutes, simply staring at Axel's door and contemplating whether to actually go in or not. He knew his friend just wanted to convince him to not go after Riku. The concern was appreciated, but he didn't feel like listening to a lecture. Anything but some talk about what was right and wrong or whatever.
These hearts seemed nothing more than a hindrance. Roxas didn't even know why he was so upset. He just knew that there was something inside of him in an incredible amount of pain, and another part was so numb.
Head tipping down, Roxas' gaze drifted along the keyblade in his grip, rubbing his thumb against the charm. It had taken some searching, but even if it was Sora's keyblade, it was still something that connected them. It hadn't taken more than an hour before he'd found it on the edge of the woods.
The only way he'd feel better would be to take Riku's head off with it. He couldn't let Axel get in his way. So after another few second of pondering, he took a step back and turned, heading for the elevator.
AXEL; Axel hadn't really been paying attention to much of anything. Once he'd gotten Roxas to agree to come see him before leaving, he'd decided against reading further into the journals afterwards. He couldn't help but feel a little guilty for telling Azula about Peace Patrol's plans.
He couldn't be bothered to focus on it, though. It would have happened anyway, right?
When he heard the steps approach his door, he stopped pacing his room and waited; he knew it was Roxas standing outside the door. Tyki would just walk in, Namine didn't know him, Riku was off moping, and Sora was--
Before he could finish the thought, he heard the steps retreating from the door and without another second, he bolted from the room and ran up to the blond, snatching his wrist.
He didn't know what to say.
ROXAS; There was nothing to say that wouldn't have sounded ridiculous. Roxas just wish he knew why it hurt so badly. Like it was only just now that he was realizing how much of him was missing.
Casting a shadowed look over his shoulder, Roxas glanced to the detained wrist before yanking it free and turning to glare. Ultima Weapon was very blatantly held crossed in front of his chest, though whether he was protecting it or using it to protect himself was unsure.
The blond shook his head.
AXEL; There was a little hesitation in any movement Axel made; he knew that Roxas was probably more unstable than he normally would be. Even if he wasn't a threat, it was likely that his best friend might lash out anyway.
Withdrawing his hand and shoving it into the pocket of his pants, he watched him for a second. It wasn't that he didn't know what to say, more so that he had no idea how to say it. He never had been good at that kind of thing, and having a heart didn't make it any easier.
Instead, he took a step closer to Roxas, only moving them for a second to hold them up to show he meant no harm.
"Thought you were going to come see me?" The ever-present teasing tone was in his voice; he didn't know what else to do.
ROXAS; His eyes flicked over Axel's hands before he lowered the keyblade a bit, letting the tip graze the floor. Brow crinkling at his teasing tone, Roxas didn't know what to say. The situation had yet to properly compute.
Finally, something came out. "How could he?" A pause. "When I couldn't even do it?"
AXEL; Axel took that moment to finally approach him, slowly, and glance off to the side. How to properly answer that? He didn't know. He'd never really been faced with killing his other half, seeing as though he didn't exist anymore.
Standing before him, he simply reached out, fingers curling around a part of Roxas' shirt, not moving closer or backing up. It was the best he could do for the moment; he still wasn't used to the physical comforting thing yet.
"Because you're better than he is."
ROXAS; He hadn't expected that response, actually. Not that he questioned Axel's loyalties, but he knew there were more people in his friend's life. That was one of the things he was having so much trouble accepting. Sora, Riku, Kairi... That guy Tyki. Before, it had been much simpler. It was just the Organization, and only the two of them spent time together.
And now he didn't know who to turn to. It was hard to look at his best friend in the same light he used to. It was hard to look at himself the same way. He'd left the Organization to find Sora... To...what? Kill him? Completely destroy him? Or simply get to know him?
But Sora had a best friend of his own. Riku. Everybody else had somebody to depend on here, and Roxas felt like a spectator. He was sick of it... It was like a bitter taste in his mouth. But now Riku had betrayed Sora, and Roxas found himself wishing Sora could be walking around again and being annoying and being best buddies with that supposed bodyguard of his.
"No. I could kill him. All of them. Even you. ...If this place made me. We've got no control here...isn't that what it wants us to think?"
AXEL; Axel froze; was that true? He wanted to think otherwise. Think that maybe they did have a choice and that no matter what he could trust at least one person; could trust his best friend. He knew Sora, knew Riku. But he'd betrayed them so easily for another connection, hadn't he? Right under Sora's line of sight. He knew if given the chance, though, he'd not do it to Roxas.
He wondered if he could say the same for anyone else in his life.
"I know you could kill him, I know that you could do that but-" He stopped for a second, the fingers in Roxas' shirt tightening a little.
He really hated the whole business of having a heart; it made things more complicated then they needed to be. Gave him feelings he probably didn't want to ever have in the first place. After all, he'd only stuck around in the Organization for the benefits of having a place to stir shit up. It was less appealing when Roxas left.
Another moment passed before he shook his head. "We have control, alright. I don't give a damn what this place wants us to think, there's always a choice. Maybe Riku was weak enough to go off and murder his best friend but I trust you, I know you wouldn't-" Another pause. Damn it. "I know that I could stand here right now no matter what and you wouldn't shove that keyblade through me, regardless of what might happen."
ROXAS; There was an unsure pause as he glanced up to Axel. It really was confusing... Everything was so much more complex now that it had stronger emotions attached to it. What did it mean to be a best friend, anyway?
"You think I'd never betray you?" A darker glint revealed itself in his eyes as he scowled, shoving roughly at Axel's hand and stepping back to point the keyblade at him. "A little late, don't you think? I betrayed the Organization. I betrayed you by leaving it, and I sure didn't need someone controlling me. Just imagine what I could do if this stupid place got hold of me? I'd probably slice you to ribbons. Then Naminé."
With a scoff, Roxas shrugged his shoulders. "Don't delude yourself into thinking we're bigger than this place. It took my keyblades from me. Took Naminé's memory of you. And we can't find a way out."
AXEL; Axel was torn between feeling hurt or angry; he couldn't decide on either and just ended up feeling like a fucking mess. He hated having a heart; hated the place for giving him one and making him feel at all. Before that, he didn't have to worry about anything; except for making sure he didn't get bored.
"Don't try to talk like you're a badass. You left the Organization and yeah, maybe you wouldn't stay, and maybe you thought that you could leave because no one would care but guess what?" He took a step closer, invading Roxas' personal space. "You were wrong. And you're wrong about this, too."
He didn't care if Roxas left the Organization; Axel hadn't made much of an attempt to stop him besides a few passed words between them. He could have tried harder; he just knew Roxas was stubborn enough to not listen.
"We are bigger than this place. Don't try to use this 'what if' bullshit as an excuse to stop caring about things."
ROXAS; Even if Axel didn't mean it, Roxas felt like he was being talked down to, and that just made him bristle up even more. "I'm not wrong! Just because you've been around a little longer, you think you know all there is to know?!"
His hand was shaking, and he was gripping the hilt hard enough to turn his knuckles white beneath the gloves. "Wonder Boy's bodyguard actually gave a crap about him! He was ready to fight me to protect him, and look what he did! He killed him! And us... We're just Nobodies. How close do you think we are? It'd probably be so easy for me to kill you." A crack in his voice.
"For you to kill me."
AXEL; "I'm closer to you than I am to the person I'm supposed to be in a damn relationship with! That's how close I think we are! If you don't reciprocate that, then that's not my fault. And if you think it'd be so easy to kill me because we're Nobodies, then do it."
He backed away from him, not even bothering to summon his chakrams; it wouldn't help the situation if he did.
"You have a keyblade in your hand right now. And hell, I'll come back in two weeks just like Sora. If you think it's so easy, if you think that our friendship doesn't matter, then-"
Axel's voice cracked. He wanted so badly to be angry at him, to be angry at Roxas for thinking any of it. But no matter how much he wanted to, no matter how hard he was trying, he couldn't bring himself to be mad.
"I could never kill you."
ROXAS; Wait. Relationship? That was new... At least to Roxas. Was he talking about Tyki? They'd never even spoken, but Roxas knew the two were intimate on a level that was slightly beyond the blond's comprehension. He'd thought that was only physical, though. A 'relationship' sounded too...serious. It was weird to hear his friend say that.
But this whole thing was weird.
"Why? Why couldn't you kill me? You're right, you know. It's not really a big deal here. You'd just come back in a couple weeks... You've died before. You're not getting any deader. So why can't you kill me?"
AXEL; Axel felt like smashing his head against the wall might have ended up being more productive than their current conversation was turning out to be. There were too many questions, too many things he had to explain; Roxas wanted answers and Axel wasn't entirely sure he could give them without sounding like a complete idiot.
Instead, he took a step closer to Roxas and simply shoved him.
"Because! It doesn't matter! If you come back, that's great, because shit happens here all the time where people get killed and if-- and if you just--" Axel felt the complete desperate frustration rising like bile. "If you just disappeared again I can't fucking take it anymore! First you leave the Organization and although you don't remember it, you left again when you merged with Sora. Then you left here, too! That's three times I've had to deal with you taking off on me and you know what, even if you came back after two weeks, I can't handle going through that shit all over again!"
Axel felt like he might explode from the sheer emotional overload he was having.
"I can't kill you because I actually care about you! I give a damn! I kept trying to get you back when everyone else gave up. I kept looking for you when no one else did. I tried to kill Sora to get you back when everyone else had resigned to you being part of the stupid Keyblade Master! I can't kill you because you're my best friend and you leaving a fourth time isn't something I can deal with. You saw me die once! Imagine losing me four times within the span of a few months."
ROXAS; The shove was enough to make him stumble, and his free hand shot out to grab the wall to keep him upright as he stared. Staring was all he could do, really, as Axel went off on a tangent that slowly turned his brain to mash.
Blinking back tears he hadn't even realized had formed, Roxas swallowed, looking away while trying to organize his thoughts into something logical to respond with. But there was nothing. The whole day had been a bit of a rollercoaster, and now he was being forced to deal with even more. He was scared, and couldn't help himself.
So he ran, turning and darting off down the hall like his very life depended on it.
AXEL; The shock of Roxas just taking off was enough to make Axel freeze for a second; watching him run. He was torn between chasing after him or just letting Roxas leave to sort everything out on his own.
Axel then realized that was a truly terrible idea at that point.
Once the initial amazement had worn off, Axel tore down the hall after his best friend, pushing himself to run as fast as he could. He hadn't ran like that in a while, and it made the muscles in his legs burn from pushing himself but he couldn't be bothered to care for the moment.
When Roxas was in sight he pushed himself a bit harder to catch up before practically jumping on the blond and tackling him to the ground, landing hard against the stone hallway. "What the hell, Roxas!"
ROXAS; He hadn't actually expected Axel to follow... Not by a long shot. So he was completely taken by surprise when he found himself suddenly losing his balance, feet completely leaving the ground for a second before his whole body crashed, keyblade skidding a few feet away.
He yelped in surprise as he landed, gloves squeaking against the floor as he shoved against it to glower over his shoulder. "That's my line! Why'd you tackle me? Get off! I let you say your speech, didn't I?! Were you expecting something else out of me?!"
AXEL; Axel stared right back at him and narrowed his eyes a little. "Yeah, I was. Like, you know, a response maybe? And running away does not count!" He wasn't angry anymore, kind of just tired from the whole escapade of emotionally exploding about the whole thing. However, he was still concerned about Roxas and didn't want him running off doing something stupid.
He sat there for a second before noticing the keyblade had been knocked far enough away that Roxas couldn't reach it. Well, that was always a plus.
"I tackled you because I don't want you to go off and act like an idiot! This seemed to be the best way to go about that." He paused. "And I'm not getting off, you'll just have to deal with it until your legs fall asleep because our conversation? Not over yet."
ROXAS; He snarled, but aside from that, made no move to attack. Even without the keyblade, he could have summoned his other powers, but it was too much trouble... And going that far just to get Axel off of him would be ridiculous.
"You need to go on a diet, you jerk!" he whined before thumping his forehead against his arms in frustration. After a long pause, he mumbled out something that one would have to strain to hear.
"Why's it so important to you to hear what I think? I thought you liked getting the last word."
AXEL; Trying not to snort with laughter, Axel rolled his eyes. "People tell me if I get any skinnier I'll snap in half and here you go around telling me to lose more weight. Any regular guy would get ten different kinds of confused~"
Axel stopped for a second at Roxas' quiet statement and thought about it. Sure, he did like getting the last word in on most fights, but their current situation? It was different.
"I need a reason to want to hear what you think about something? I want to know because... I just do. I just told you a whole lot of crap and- and I don't know. I just want you to say something instead of acting like a jackass."
ROXAS; "The guy currently using me as a makeshift futon is calling me a jackass? That's rich." Sarcasm was the easiest way to cover up what he was really thinking, and helped give him some time to organize his thoughts. ...Still, it wasn't enough time, so he stayed quiet for awhile longer before hiding his face even more, if it was possible.
"...I missed you. After I left."
AXEL; "Damn right he is."
The next statement was enough to shut Axel up for a few minutes. He'd never expected Roxas to miss him, let alone admit it to him in any lifetime. Truth be told, he'd missed Roxas, too. But that much should have been evident in the wild chase to Twilight Town and the places after it.
Axel was left to choose between completely ruining everything with a sarcastic remark, or actually--
"Why? I thought you'd be glad to get a break from me."
ROXAS; "A break? ...You're such an idiot. It had nothing to do with you. But I..." An uncomfortable shift, mostly because his legs were falling asleep. It was true that Axel was thin, but he still has plenty of muscle tone, and lying sprawled in this position was not only embarrassing, but not very gentle on his nerves.
"I wouldn't have minded if you'd come with me." Putting on the scariest face he could at the moment, which was fairly pathetic, he glared back over his shoulder again. "Happy now? Get off."
AXEL; He debated on moving or not once Roxas had finished and decided that no, he wasn't quite ready for Roxas to get up and walk away quite yet. Which Axel was sure he would probably do as soon as he could.
"I'm not an idiot!" Indignant. "I know it wasn't about me, but I didn't expect you to miss me after you left, right. I more thought you'd be off focusing on whatever the hell it was that you ended up doing." He shrugged a little. "Yeah, you say that now. I get the impression that back then you wouldn't have been all that big on the idea of me tagging along for your self-discovery mission."
ROXAS; It was true. He had been on a mission, and had been very single-minded about it. He'd like to think he still was, but...things were a little complicated now, and he had this place and his heart to blame that on.
"Maybe. Maybe not. But I still missed you. I didn't need a heart for that." Incredibly irritated that Axel had yet to move, he moved fast, jerking his knee up so that he could anchor his shoe against the floor, giving him enough leverage to shove himself up and around, elbowing the redhead square in the shoulder in an attempt to knock him off.
AXEL; "No sh--" Axel was promptly cut off at the elbow to his shoulder, shoved off from Roxas and onto the floor again. Well, that had been unexpected.
"What the hell, Roxas!" Sure, he'd been laying on him, and Roxas' legs had probably been falling asleep in the process, but hell if that didn't hurt. A little, at least. He rolled over and sat up, crossing his legs and leaning over. "Going to take off again?"
ROXAS; "You smashed my face against the floor!" he yelled back in his defense, only as he was turning over and trying to stand again, the pins and needles in his legs felt quite differently about it, which just left him flopping onto his back instead of his front.
At least the ceiling was better to look at than the cold floor. He sighed.
"...No. There's no point." Sure, he could be stubborn, but the fire had finally died. He didn't actually want to kill Riku. He just wanted someone to blame...Something other than the castle. He couldn't fight the castle.
AXEL; Axel paused. "By accident." Well, the tackling hadn't been an accident, but he sure hadn't meant to smash any faces into any floors. At least not that time.
When Roxas admitted to staying, he relaxed considerably and sighed, shifting back to lean against the nearby wall, drawing his knees up and resting his arms on top of them. He was already tired and it was only early evening. The whole business of emotions and hearts was damn well tiring when Roxas was your best friend.
"He's not worth it, anyway."
ROXAS; Finally sitting up, as much of a pain as it was, he stretched over to snatch the keyblade back up off the floor. Last thing he needed was someone walking by and tripping over it. ...They might scratch it.
"What about the boy wonder?" Inspecting the blade, just to have something to look at, he tried to keep his tone as casual as possible. "Is he worth it? Fighting for?" Oh, right, there was that mildly accusatory tone, and a sharp look now suddenly pointed at Axel.
"Seriously. Falling on your chakram? Just how stupid do you think I am?"
AXEL; Well, there went that. Axel let his head drop back against the wall, staring up to the ceiling and shrugging. "Was the best thing I could think of at the time. You really expected me to tell you what happened for how angry you were at him?"
Turning his head to look over at Roxas, he stared at him for a second. Was Sora worth fighting for? Sure, he was part of Roxas, after all, and Roxas was his best friend. Instantly makes him worth it. Right?
His gaze slid back to the ceiling. "He's only worth it when you're merged with him." Otherwise, Sora was just Sora. "Can't get you back if he's dead."
ROXAS; For some reason that just seemed mildly hilarious enough to laugh at. And laugh he did, though not loud enough for anyone else in their rooms to hear. It wasn't like he didn't still have anger inside of him... He had so much of that he often didn't know what to do with himself.
But it was good to feel something other than that now and then, and to be reminded that there were still things to smile about. "You're such a jerk, you know that?" The laughter subsided, leaving behind a light smile in the aftermath. "But I guess you're my jerk, so I'll have to take responsibility for you."
Using the keyblade for leverage, he stood up and held his hand out. "Better go shave your legs. I picked out the perfect dress for you to wear tomorrow."
AXEL; Axel grinned and shrugged again. "I'm a jerk through and through, I hear it runs in the Organization. You were such a bad influence on me." He paused at Roxas' comment and then gave a snort. "I'm your jerk now? Heh. New to me."
Axel took the offered hand and stood, brushing his jeans off a bit before stopping and staring at him. "What? No! You're totally losing the bet, man." He shook his head. "We'll make sure yours has a lot of lace and frills on it."
ROXAS; "Votes were totally going in my favor last time I checked, so unless you start paying people to vote for you, you'll be wearing stockings and mary-janes before the week's up." Looking down the hall, he noticed Axel's door was still open. Oops. At least nobody had happened upon them, especially with Roxas facefirst on the floor.
"Whose jerk would you say you are, then? You're too immature to be your own guardian."
AXEL; He tried really, very hard not to just pout. He did not want to wear a dress. Ever. And the mention of stockings and girl shoes, well. Axel figured he might be better off throwing himself from the top of the castle. "Shut up, no I won't. And no. No mary-janes!"
Axel paused and turned to look at him. "And you think you're fit for the job, do you?"
ROXAS; No hesitation needed for that one. "Yeah. I do." Then he reached up and gave a light shove to his arm before pointing down the hall with the keyblade. "Now stop whining and go make kissy-face with your boyfriend or whatever."
With a satisfied smirk, he turned to go, muttering a barely audible, "Thanks," under his breath on the way to the elevator.
AXEL; Axel paused and looked between Roxas and the door to his room which was still ajar; said boyfriend was out. Doing something or other. Axel never bothered to ask most days, unless he was bored and wanted to go. He realized he'd started to zone out.
"Hey!" He turned his attention back to Roxas. "I'll let you know when you lose the bet."
ROXAS; Pretty persistant, wasn't he? Roxas was sure he was gonna win, but just in case...he needed to plan an escape route if he lost. He'd sooner lose a fight to the boy scout than be caught waltzing around in a dress too girly for an actual girl to wear.
After pressing the button for his floor, he just shook his head at Axel, humming the death march for his poor friend's sake just before the doors slid shut.
What: Someone actually manages to convince Roxas not to do something crazy. Throw a party. Oh, and there is some obscure bonding tiemz, in the form of tackling and face-meet-floor.
When: May 24th, evening.
Where: Second floor hallway.
Rating: PG-13 for language and wangst.
ROXAS; He'd been standing in the hallway for a good two minutes, simply staring at Axel's door and contemplating whether to actually go in or not. He knew his friend just wanted to convince him to not go after Riku. The concern was appreciated, but he didn't feel like listening to a lecture. Anything but some talk about what was right and wrong or whatever.
These hearts seemed nothing more than a hindrance. Roxas didn't even know why he was so upset. He just knew that there was something inside of him in an incredible amount of pain, and another part was so numb.
Head tipping down, Roxas' gaze drifted along the keyblade in his grip, rubbing his thumb against the charm. It had taken some searching, but even if it was Sora's keyblade, it was still something that connected them. It hadn't taken more than an hour before he'd found it on the edge of the woods.
The only way he'd feel better would be to take Riku's head off with it. He couldn't let Axel get in his way. So after another few second of pondering, he took a step back and turned, heading for the elevator.
AXEL; Axel hadn't really been paying attention to much of anything. Once he'd gotten Roxas to agree to come see him before leaving, he'd decided against reading further into the journals afterwards. He couldn't help but feel a little guilty for telling Azula about Peace Patrol's plans.
He couldn't be bothered to focus on it, though. It would have happened anyway, right?
When he heard the steps approach his door, he stopped pacing his room and waited; he knew it was Roxas standing outside the door. Tyki would just walk in, Namine didn't know him, Riku was off moping, and Sora was--
Before he could finish the thought, he heard the steps retreating from the door and without another second, he bolted from the room and ran up to the blond, snatching his wrist.
He didn't know what to say.
ROXAS; There was nothing to say that wouldn't have sounded ridiculous. Roxas just wish he knew why it hurt so badly. Like it was only just now that he was realizing how much of him was missing.
Casting a shadowed look over his shoulder, Roxas glanced to the detained wrist before yanking it free and turning to glare. Ultima Weapon was very blatantly held crossed in front of his chest, though whether he was protecting it or using it to protect himself was unsure.
The blond shook his head.
AXEL; There was a little hesitation in any movement Axel made; he knew that Roxas was probably more unstable than he normally would be. Even if he wasn't a threat, it was likely that his best friend might lash out anyway.
Withdrawing his hand and shoving it into the pocket of his pants, he watched him for a second. It wasn't that he didn't know what to say, more so that he had no idea how to say it. He never had been good at that kind of thing, and having a heart didn't make it any easier.
Instead, he took a step closer to Roxas, only moving them for a second to hold them up to show he meant no harm.
"Thought you were going to come see me?" The ever-present teasing tone was in his voice; he didn't know what else to do.
ROXAS; His eyes flicked over Axel's hands before he lowered the keyblade a bit, letting the tip graze the floor. Brow crinkling at his teasing tone, Roxas didn't know what to say. The situation had yet to properly compute.
Finally, something came out. "How could he?" A pause. "When I couldn't even do it?"
AXEL; Axel took that moment to finally approach him, slowly, and glance off to the side. How to properly answer that? He didn't know. He'd never really been faced with killing his other half, seeing as though he didn't exist anymore.
Standing before him, he simply reached out, fingers curling around a part of Roxas' shirt, not moving closer or backing up. It was the best he could do for the moment; he still wasn't used to the physical comforting thing yet.
"Because you're better than he is."
ROXAS; He hadn't expected that response, actually. Not that he questioned Axel's loyalties, but he knew there were more people in his friend's life. That was one of the things he was having so much trouble accepting. Sora, Riku, Kairi... That guy Tyki. Before, it had been much simpler. It was just the Organization, and only the two of them spent time together.
And now he didn't know who to turn to. It was hard to look at his best friend in the same light he used to. It was hard to look at himself the same way. He'd left the Organization to find Sora... To...what? Kill him? Completely destroy him? Or simply get to know him?
But Sora had a best friend of his own. Riku. Everybody else had somebody to depend on here, and Roxas felt like a spectator. He was sick of it... It was like a bitter taste in his mouth. But now Riku had betrayed Sora, and Roxas found himself wishing Sora could be walking around again and being annoying and being best buddies with that supposed bodyguard of his.
"No. I could kill him. All of them. Even you. ...If this place made me. We've got no control here...isn't that what it wants us to think?"
AXEL; Axel froze; was that true? He wanted to think otherwise. Think that maybe they did have a choice and that no matter what he could trust at least one person; could trust his best friend. He knew Sora, knew Riku. But he'd betrayed them so easily for another connection, hadn't he? Right under Sora's line of sight. He knew if given the chance, though, he'd not do it to Roxas.
He wondered if he could say the same for anyone else in his life.
"I know you could kill him, I know that you could do that but-" He stopped for a second, the fingers in Roxas' shirt tightening a little.
He really hated the whole business of having a heart; it made things more complicated then they needed to be. Gave him feelings he probably didn't want to ever have in the first place. After all, he'd only stuck around in the Organization for the benefits of having a place to stir shit up. It was less appealing when Roxas left.
Another moment passed before he shook his head. "We have control, alright. I don't give a damn what this place wants us to think, there's always a choice. Maybe Riku was weak enough to go off and murder his best friend but I trust you, I know you wouldn't-" Another pause. Damn it. "I know that I could stand here right now no matter what and you wouldn't shove that keyblade through me, regardless of what might happen."
ROXAS; There was an unsure pause as he glanced up to Axel. It really was confusing... Everything was so much more complex now that it had stronger emotions attached to it. What did it mean to be a best friend, anyway?
"You think I'd never betray you?" A darker glint revealed itself in his eyes as he scowled, shoving roughly at Axel's hand and stepping back to point the keyblade at him. "A little late, don't you think? I betrayed the Organization. I betrayed you by leaving it, and I sure didn't need someone controlling me. Just imagine what I could do if this stupid place got hold of me? I'd probably slice you to ribbons. Then Naminé."
With a scoff, Roxas shrugged his shoulders. "Don't delude yourself into thinking we're bigger than this place. It took my keyblades from me. Took Naminé's memory of you. And we can't find a way out."
AXEL; Axel was torn between feeling hurt or angry; he couldn't decide on either and just ended up feeling like a fucking mess. He hated having a heart; hated the place for giving him one and making him feel at all. Before that, he didn't have to worry about anything; except for making sure he didn't get bored.
"Don't try to talk like you're a badass. You left the Organization and yeah, maybe you wouldn't stay, and maybe you thought that you could leave because no one would care but guess what?" He took a step closer, invading Roxas' personal space. "You were wrong. And you're wrong about this, too."
He didn't care if Roxas left the Organization; Axel hadn't made much of an attempt to stop him besides a few passed words between them. He could have tried harder; he just knew Roxas was stubborn enough to not listen.
"We are bigger than this place. Don't try to use this 'what if' bullshit as an excuse to stop caring about things."
ROXAS; Even if Axel didn't mean it, Roxas felt like he was being talked down to, and that just made him bristle up even more. "I'm not wrong! Just because you've been around a little longer, you think you know all there is to know?!"
His hand was shaking, and he was gripping the hilt hard enough to turn his knuckles white beneath the gloves. "Wonder Boy's bodyguard actually gave a crap about him! He was ready to fight me to protect him, and look what he did! He killed him! And us... We're just Nobodies. How close do you think we are? It'd probably be so easy for me to kill you." A crack in his voice.
"For you to kill me."
AXEL; "I'm closer to you than I am to the person I'm supposed to be in a damn relationship with! That's how close I think we are! If you don't reciprocate that, then that's not my fault. And if you think it'd be so easy to kill me because we're Nobodies, then do it."
He backed away from him, not even bothering to summon his chakrams; it wouldn't help the situation if he did.
"You have a keyblade in your hand right now. And hell, I'll come back in two weeks just like Sora. If you think it's so easy, if you think that our friendship doesn't matter, then-"
Axel's voice cracked. He wanted so badly to be angry at him, to be angry at Roxas for thinking any of it. But no matter how much he wanted to, no matter how hard he was trying, he couldn't bring himself to be mad.
"I could never kill you."
ROXAS; Wait. Relationship? That was new... At least to Roxas. Was he talking about Tyki? They'd never even spoken, but Roxas knew the two were intimate on a level that was slightly beyond the blond's comprehension. He'd thought that was only physical, though. A 'relationship' sounded too...serious. It was weird to hear his friend say that.
But this whole thing was weird.
"Why? Why couldn't you kill me? You're right, you know. It's not really a big deal here. You'd just come back in a couple weeks... You've died before. You're not getting any deader. So why can't you kill me?"
AXEL; Axel felt like smashing his head against the wall might have ended up being more productive than their current conversation was turning out to be. There were too many questions, too many things he had to explain; Roxas wanted answers and Axel wasn't entirely sure he could give them without sounding like a complete idiot.
Instead, he took a step closer to Roxas and simply shoved him.
"Because! It doesn't matter! If you come back, that's great, because shit happens here all the time where people get killed and if-- and if you just--" Axel felt the complete desperate frustration rising like bile. "If you just disappeared again I can't fucking take it anymore! First you leave the Organization and although you don't remember it, you left again when you merged with Sora. Then you left here, too! That's three times I've had to deal with you taking off on me and you know what, even if you came back after two weeks, I can't handle going through that shit all over again!"
Axel felt like he might explode from the sheer emotional overload he was having.
"I can't kill you because I actually care about you! I give a damn! I kept trying to get you back when everyone else gave up. I kept looking for you when no one else did. I tried to kill Sora to get you back when everyone else had resigned to you being part of the stupid Keyblade Master! I can't kill you because you're my best friend and you leaving a fourth time isn't something I can deal with. You saw me die once! Imagine losing me four times within the span of a few months."
ROXAS; The shove was enough to make him stumble, and his free hand shot out to grab the wall to keep him upright as he stared. Staring was all he could do, really, as Axel went off on a tangent that slowly turned his brain to mash.
Blinking back tears he hadn't even realized had formed, Roxas swallowed, looking away while trying to organize his thoughts into something logical to respond with. But there was nothing. The whole day had been a bit of a rollercoaster, and now he was being forced to deal with even more. He was scared, and couldn't help himself.
So he ran, turning and darting off down the hall like his very life depended on it.
AXEL; The shock of Roxas just taking off was enough to make Axel freeze for a second; watching him run. He was torn between chasing after him or just letting Roxas leave to sort everything out on his own.
Axel then realized that was a truly terrible idea at that point.
Once the initial amazement had worn off, Axel tore down the hall after his best friend, pushing himself to run as fast as he could. He hadn't ran like that in a while, and it made the muscles in his legs burn from pushing himself but he couldn't be bothered to care for the moment.
When Roxas was in sight he pushed himself a bit harder to catch up before practically jumping on the blond and tackling him to the ground, landing hard against the stone hallway. "What the hell, Roxas!"
ROXAS; He hadn't actually expected Axel to follow... Not by a long shot. So he was completely taken by surprise when he found himself suddenly losing his balance, feet completely leaving the ground for a second before his whole body crashed, keyblade skidding a few feet away.
He yelped in surprise as he landed, gloves squeaking against the floor as he shoved against it to glower over his shoulder. "That's my line! Why'd you tackle me? Get off! I let you say your speech, didn't I?! Were you expecting something else out of me?!"
AXEL; Axel stared right back at him and narrowed his eyes a little. "Yeah, I was. Like, you know, a response maybe? And running away does not count!" He wasn't angry anymore, kind of just tired from the whole escapade of emotionally exploding about the whole thing. However, he was still concerned about Roxas and didn't want him running off doing something stupid.
He sat there for a second before noticing the keyblade had been knocked far enough away that Roxas couldn't reach it. Well, that was always a plus.
"I tackled you because I don't want you to go off and act like an idiot! This seemed to be the best way to go about that." He paused. "And I'm not getting off, you'll just have to deal with it until your legs fall asleep because our conversation? Not over yet."
ROXAS; He snarled, but aside from that, made no move to attack. Even without the keyblade, he could have summoned his other powers, but it was too much trouble... And going that far just to get Axel off of him would be ridiculous.
"You need to go on a diet, you jerk!" he whined before thumping his forehead against his arms in frustration. After a long pause, he mumbled out something that one would have to strain to hear.
"Why's it so important to you to hear what I think? I thought you liked getting the last word."
AXEL; Trying not to snort with laughter, Axel rolled his eyes. "People tell me if I get any skinnier I'll snap in half and here you go around telling me to lose more weight. Any regular guy would get ten different kinds of confused~"
Axel stopped for a second at Roxas' quiet statement and thought about it. Sure, he did like getting the last word in on most fights, but their current situation? It was different.
"I need a reason to want to hear what you think about something? I want to know because... I just do. I just told you a whole lot of crap and- and I don't know. I just want you to say something instead of acting like a jackass."
ROXAS; "The guy currently using me as a makeshift futon is calling me a jackass? That's rich." Sarcasm was the easiest way to cover up what he was really thinking, and helped give him some time to organize his thoughts. ...Still, it wasn't enough time, so he stayed quiet for awhile longer before hiding his face even more, if it was possible.
"...I missed you. After I left."
AXEL; "Damn right he is."
The next statement was enough to shut Axel up for a few minutes. He'd never expected Roxas to miss him, let alone admit it to him in any lifetime. Truth be told, he'd missed Roxas, too. But that much should have been evident in the wild chase to Twilight Town and the places after it.
Axel was left to choose between completely ruining everything with a sarcastic remark, or actually--
"Why? I thought you'd be glad to get a break from me."
ROXAS; "A break? ...You're such an idiot. It had nothing to do with you. But I..." An uncomfortable shift, mostly because his legs were falling asleep. It was true that Axel was thin, but he still has plenty of muscle tone, and lying sprawled in this position was not only embarrassing, but not very gentle on his nerves.
"I wouldn't have minded if you'd come with me." Putting on the scariest face he could at the moment, which was fairly pathetic, he glared back over his shoulder again. "Happy now? Get off."
AXEL; He debated on moving or not once Roxas had finished and decided that no, he wasn't quite ready for Roxas to get up and walk away quite yet. Which Axel was sure he would probably do as soon as he could.
"I'm not an idiot!" Indignant. "I know it wasn't about me, but I didn't expect you to miss me after you left, right. I more thought you'd be off focusing on whatever the hell it was that you ended up doing." He shrugged a little. "Yeah, you say that now. I get the impression that back then you wouldn't have been all that big on the idea of me tagging along for your self-discovery mission."
ROXAS; It was true. He had been on a mission, and had been very single-minded about it. He'd like to think he still was, but...things were a little complicated now, and he had this place and his heart to blame that on.
"Maybe. Maybe not. But I still missed you. I didn't need a heart for that." Incredibly irritated that Axel had yet to move, he moved fast, jerking his knee up so that he could anchor his shoe against the floor, giving him enough leverage to shove himself up and around, elbowing the redhead square in the shoulder in an attempt to knock him off.
AXEL; "No sh--" Axel was promptly cut off at the elbow to his shoulder, shoved off from Roxas and onto the floor again. Well, that had been unexpected.
"What the hell, Roxas!" Sure, he'd been laying on him, and Roxas' legs had probably been falling asleep in the process, but hell if that didn't hurt. A little, at least. He rolled over and sat up, crossing his legs and leaning over. "Going to take off again?"
ROXAS; "You smashed my face against the floor!" he yelled back in his defense, only as he was turning over and trying to stand again, the pins and needles in his legs felt quite differently about it, which just left him flopping onto his back instead of his front.
At least the ceiling was better to look at than the cold floor. He sighed.
"...No. There's no point." Sure, he could be stubborn, but the fire had finally died. He didn't actually want to kill Riku. He just wanted someone to blame...Something other than the castle. He couldn't fight the castle.
AXEL; Axel paused. "By accident." Well, the tackling hadn't been an accident, but he sure hadn't meant to smash any faces into any floors. At least not that time.
When Roxas admitted to staying, he relaxed considerably and sighed, shifting back to lean against the nearby wall, drawing his knees up and resting his arms on top of them. He was already tired and it was only early evening. The whole business of emotions and hearts was damn well tiring when Roxas was your best friend.
"He's not worth it, anyway."
ROXAS; Finally sitting up, as much of a pain as it was, he stretched over to snatch the keyblade back up off the floor. Last thing he needed was someone walking by and tripping over it. ...They might scratch it.
"What about the boy wonder?" Inspecting the blade, just to have something to look at, he tried to keep his tone as casual as possible. "Is he worth it? Fighting for?" Oh, right, there was that mildly accusatory tone, and a sharp look now suddenly pointed at Axel.
"Seriously. Falling on your chakram? Just how stupid do you think I am?"
AXEL; Well, there went that. Axel let his head drop back against the wall, staring up to the ceiling and shrugging. "Was the best thing I could think of at the time. You really expected me to tell you what happened for how angry you were at him?"
Turning his head to look over at Roxas, he stared at him for a second. Was Sora worth fighting for? Sure, he was part of Roxas, after all, and Roxas was his best friend. Instantly makes him worth it. Right?
His gaze slid back to the ceiling. "He's only worth it when you're merged with him." Otherwise, Sora was just Sora. "Can't get you back if he's dead."
ROXAS; For some reason that just seemed mildly hilarious enough to laugh at. And laugh he did, though not loud enough for anyone else in their rooms to hear. It wasn't like he didn't still have anger inside of him... He had so much of that he often didn't know what to do with himself.
But it was good to feel something other than that now and then, and to be reminded that there were still things to smile about. "You're such a jerk, you know that?" The laughter subsided, leaving behind a light smile in the aftermath. "But I guess you're my jerk, so I'll have to take responsibility for you."
Using the keyblade for leverage, he stood up and held his hand out. "Better go shave your legs. I picked out the perfect dress for you to wear tomorrow."
AXEL; Axel grinned and shrugged again. "I'm a jerk through and through, I hear it runs in the Organization. You were such a bad influence on me." He paused at Roxas' comment and then gave a snort. "I'm your jerk now? Heh. New to me."
Axel took the offered hand and stood, brushing his jeans off a bit before stopping and staring at him. "What? No! You're totally losing the bet, man." He shook his head. "We'll make sure yours has a lot of lace and frills on it."
ROXAS; "Votes were totally going in my favor last time I checked, so unless you start paying people to vote for you, you'll be wearing stockings and mary-janes before the week's up." Looking down the hall, he noticed Axel's door was still open. Oops. At least nobody had happened upon them, especially with Roxas facefirst on the floor.
"Whose jerk would you say you are, then? You're too immature to be your own guardian."
AXEL; He tried really, very hard not to just pout. He did not want to wear a dress. Ever. And the mention of stockings and girl shoes, well. Axel figured he might be better off throwing himself from the top of the castle. "Shut up, no I won't. And no. No mary-janes!"
Axel paused and turned to look at him. "And you think you're fit for the job, do you?"
ROXAS; No hesitation needed for that one. "Yeah. I do." Then he reached up and gave a light shove to his arm before pointing down the hall with the keyblade. "Now stop whining and go make kissy-face with your boyfriend or whatever."
With a satisfied smirk, he turned to go, muttering a barely audible, "Thanks," under his breath on the way to the elevator.
AXEL; Axel paused and looked between Roxas and the door to his room which was still ajar; said boyfriend was out. Doing something or other. Axel never bothered to ask most days, unless he was bored and wanted to go. He realized he'd started to zone out.
"Hey!" He turned his attention back to Roxas. "I'll let you know when you lose the bet."
ROXAS; Pretty persistant, wasn't he? Roxas was sure he was gonna win, but just in case...he needed to plan an escape route if he lost. He'd sooner lose a fight to the boy scout than be caught waltzing around in a dress too girly for an actual girl to wear.
After pressing the button for his floor, he just shook his head at Axel, humming the death march for his poor friend's sake just before the doors slid shut.