[Thread: Dust to Dust]
Who: Xehanort(anothervariable), Zexion(trialbyillusion), Anyone
What: Xehanort holds a small memorial service after the death of Even and the disappearance of both Ansem the Wise and Xemnas.
When: A short while back.
Where: Outside the castle.
Rating: G-PG
[OOC: Yeah, this is one mun letting two of her kiddos interact for a little while. Three reasons! One is that I've made mention of them talking before and had kinda wanted to flesh out a discussion between them (involving the castle setting or whatnot). Two is that both "muses" have been lurking lately. I hoped a quick thread would kick them both into gear. And three is that I had wanted to do a memorial thread with Xehanort and didn't think there would be much interest outside of... well, Xehanort. Zexion's just making a quick visit. It's all pretty nonsensical between them. Playing two characters at once... not my cup of tea. Anywho. All welcome once Zex wanders off, though I don't expect much given the subject. :3]
It wasn't, in all technicality, fair.
Xehanort headed down the stairway, keeping a steady pace despite the tug of a Shadow Heartless at the end of its leash. The creature had a troublesome habit of wandering off. At least it had been behaving a little better in the last few weeks. Or maybe the researcher had just stopped noticing the worst of its acquired behaviors. There was too much on his mind to allow for excess worries like pet projects.
Technicalities. That's what had overtaken him. They weren't even helping as much as he'd hoped they would. All those science courses, all the work with theories and variables, concepts and stable notions. None of it was relevant here. Notes went missing, whole people simply vanished. All his answers, all of what would be an escape from entrapment. What did any of it matter? How far could he possibly hope to go when only half the solutions were available to him? Half- no, not even that much. Everything was falling apart faster than he was capable of putting one and two together. There was no understanding.
It left Xehanort unsettled at first. At times, it actually hurt to consider all that had taken place. He'd never suffered loss before. Not that sort of loss. His memories and his past had been stripped from him at the very beginning, but with no remembrance, there was no pain. No regret. No fleeting demands of what-if and why-for. He couldn't explain the distress, the confusion, that came with such bouts of reflection. That was something new. Genuinely new and maybe just a little frightening. He wanted to need the unknown and have it need him in return, but all the dead ends to his questions were maddening. He was sick with it all. He wanted it gone.
Ansem. Master Ansem. Xehanort had taken to his guidance for so long. Feverish begging remained in the shadow of his waking thoughts- please, please return. He'd take anything. Familiarity, structure, a kind word or two. Nothing had been left behind to salvage.
Xemnas, too. His past and his future gone just like that. Xehanort wasn't sure who would be next. Himself, maybe. His Heartless. Or Dilan even. He hadn't heard from Dilan in such a long time. Maybe he was already gone. Like Even. Destroyed. Lost to him before he could help.
And maybe it was all his fault. He'd been told what his future was supposed to be. Maybe it was fitting like that. To wrought chaos one way or another. With or without the intention. Accidents, misplaced judgement. Monsters?
He stepped out of the castle's front entrance and followed the path there, moving with no real destination in mind. Just a quiet stretch of land somewhere would work. If nothing else, he would have the opportunity to pay his respects to those lost. It was possible he'd never have a second chance to do that.
"There are no answers," he recited softly, kneeling down once he'd gotten far enough away from the castle itself. The dirt smudging against his coat was ignored: negligence had taken over in his attempts at simply letting go. It didn't really matter. He had accepted that. There was no Even around to scoff at stray spots of filth, there was no Master Ansem. Only a castle of strangers and a Shadow that had wandered out from under its leash yet again. He slipped the rope back into his pocket without a second thought, "There are no questions, are there?"
He didn't honestly expect a reply, but it felt right to give voice to the words even when there were no apprentices or stern masters to fill in the blanks.
What: Xehanort holds a small memorial service after the death of Even and the disappearance of both Ansem the Wise and Xemnas.
When: A short while back.
Where: Outside the castle.
Rating: G-PG
[OOC: Yeah, this is one mun letting two of her kiddos interact for a little while. Three reasons! One is that I've made mention of them talking before and had kinda wanted to flesh out a discussion between them (involving the castle setting or whatnot). Two is that both "muses" have been lurking lately. I hoped a quick thread would kick them both into gear. And three is that I had wanted to do a memorial thread with Xehanort and didn't think there would be much interest outside of... well, Xehanort. Zexion's just making a quick visit. It's all pretty nonsensical between them. Playing two characters at once... not my cup of tea. Anywho. All welcome once Zex wanders off, though I don't expect much given the subject. :3]
It wasn't, in all technicality, fair.
Xehanort headed down the stairway, keeping a steady pace despite the tug of a Shadow Heartless at the end of its leash. The creature had a troublesome habit of wandering off. At least it had been behaving a little better in the last few weeks. Or maybe the researcher had just stopped noticing the worst of its acquired behaviors. There was too much on his mind to allow for excess worries like pet projects.
Technicalities. That's what had overtaken him. They weren't even helping as much as he'd hoped they would. All those science courses, all the work with theories and variables, concepts and stable notions. None of it was relevant here. Notes went missing, whole people simply vanished. All his answers, all of what would be an escape from entrapment. What did any of it matter? How far could he possibly hope to go when only half the solutions were available to him? Half- no, not even that much. Everything was falling apart faster than he was capable of putting one and two together. There was no understanding.
It left Xehanort unsettled at first. At times, it actually hurt to consider all that had taken place. He'd never suffered loss before. Not that sort of loss. His memories and his past had been stripped from him at the very beginning, but with no remembrance, there was no pain. No regret. No fleeting demands of what-if and why-for. He couldn't explain the distress, the confusion, that came with such bouts of reflection. That was something new. Genuinely new and maybe just a little frightening. He wanted to need the unknown and have it need him in return, but all the dead ends to his questions were maddening. He was sick with it all. He wanted it gone.
Ansem. Master Ansem. Xehanort had taken to his guidance for so long. Feverish begging remained in the shadow of his waking thoughts- please, please return. He'd take anything. Familiarity, structure, a kind word or two. Nothing had been left behind to salvage.
Xemnas, too. His past and his future gone just like that. Xehanort wasn't sure who would be next. Himself, maybe. His Heartless. Or Dilan even. He hadn't heard from Dilan in such a long time. Maybe he was already gone. Like Even. Destroyed. Lost to him before he could help.
And maybe it was all his fault. He'd been told what his future was supposed to be. Maybe it was fitting like that. To wrought chaos one way or another. With or without the intention. Accidents, misplaced judgement. Monsters?
He stepped out of the castle's front entrance and followed the path there, moving with no real destination in mind. Just a quiet stretch of land somewhere would work. If nothing else, he would have the opportunity to pay his respects to those lost. It was possible he'd never have a second chance to do that.
"There are no answers," he recited softly, kneeling down once he'd gotten far enough away from the castle itself. The dirt smudging against his coat was ignored: negligence had taken over in his attempts at simply letting go. It didn't really matter. He had accepted that. There was no Even around to scoff at stray spots of filth, there was no Master Ansem. Only a castle of strangers and a Shadow that had wandered out from under its leash yet again. He slipped the rope back into his pocket without a second thought, "There are no questions, are there?"
He didn't honestly expect a reply, but it felt right to give voice to the words even when there were no apprentices or stern masters to fill in the blanks.