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[ofkirkwall]

Hello? Guys? This isn't funny, my birthday isn't for another two months. [ A sigh and she starts pacing, loudly. ]

Fenris? Isabela? [ Long pause. ] ...Anders?

Can someone tell me why I can't smell Lowtown burning anymore and when exactly did magic books become a thing? They would have been incredibly helpful six years ago.

Comments

[checkbelowdecks]

[...well, shit.]

Why, hello Hawke. Fancy meeting you here. Of all places.

[ofkirkwall]

[ She's both ridiculous relieved and mildly concerned to hear her voice. ]

Isabela! I was wondering where you got off too, there we were having such a lovely chat in the middle of Lowtown and bam [ ...literally. ] everyone was gone. It was really quite distressing.

[checkbelowdecks]

[confused 'cause yaay different canon points]

Were we? That's not what I recall, and I'm pretty sure I'm not drunk. [maybe]

[ofkirkwall]

[ And she's got the worst of all. ]

You mean you're sober? Quick call the Cha-- [ Bad joke, worst joke. Change the subject right now. ] What do you mean that's not what you recall?

[checkbelowdecks]

[pretty much.

A pause, and then carefully casual:] I haven't seen you in three years.

[ofkirkwall]

What? Isabela you were standing right there with the rest of us. [ She can feel another headache coming on. ]

[checkbelowdecks]

[Hawke's having such a great day]

What for? It's not like the Champion of Kirkwall needs someone like me around.

[Oops. Did you have this conversation already?]

[ofkirkwall]

[ The best day ever!

She recongizes those words instantly and groans. SHE THOUGHT THEY WERE DONE WITH THAT. ] We've already been over this.

[checkbelowdecks]

[there's another pause and the sound of a liquid being swirled around in a bottle. She peers dubiously at the alcohol. Just what the fuck is in this?

...Totally taking another swig anyway.]

Jog my memory. How did it turn out?

[ofkirkwall]

I talked, you drank, you called yourself a lying thieving snake, I said something along the lines of 'at least you have a nice ass' or maybe it was something about us being friends--I don't remember the specifics, it was a very busy day for me.

[checkbelowdecks]

[huh. Sounds legit.

A rather melodramatic sigh.]

Great. I spent all that time [when the booze ran out] thinking about what I was going to say and you go and say it for me. Including the part about my nice ass.

[ofkirkwall]

It is a very nice ass.

[ And then she flops down in a chair with a heavy sigh, covering her face with her hands. ] What in the name of the Maker is going on?

[checkbelowdecks]

Oh, a magic castle has kidnapped us and is keeping us here for some reason. Nothing to worry about.

Did you say something about Lowtown burning?

[ofkirkwall]

[ She doesn't know, Maker she has no idea and Hawke isn't exactly keen on telling her that one of their companions may have jump started a war in the worst possible way.

Let's focus on the magic castle thing. ]

Magic castle? [ The disbelief in her voice is almost deafening. ] I hope you're bullshitting again, there's no way that is even remotely possible.

[checkbelowdecks]

[preoccupied with sounding normal while trying to feel out if Hawke's actually mad at the Qunari thing.]

Do I look like Varric to you? And you should really see Fenris. He's so mad at this place it's actually rather funny.

[ofkirkwall]

[ She was never mad, not really, if she was mad she wouldn't have put her neck on the line trying to save Isabela from whatever it was the Arishok was going to do with her. ]

...You're not kidding are you? I've been kidnapped by a magical bloody castle! What a grand day I'm having.