Page 51; The Eighth Fonon is Alcohol

[chosenfake]

Hey. Hey hey hey. Hey. Hey. PAY ATTENTION. I have a really big announcement to make.

IS EVERYONE LISTENING?

[a pause]

Okay, good.

... What was I talking about?

-- Oh yeah! So, I have some big news.

MY GIRLFRIEND'S MELONS ARE BETTER THAN YOURS.

Let's look at the reasons why.

One. She's really, really fit. 'Cause she's a soldier. Or she was

Comments

[mmm_paradise]

[laughing. a little helplessly.]

Accolades, sir, I will keep a record of this for my permanent records. Just so neither of us forget.

[chosenfake]

Oh hi, Joshua.

... What's an accolade? Is it like a juice?

[mmm_paradise]

No. Nnnonono. That's Kool-Aid. It's terrible for you. It tastes awesome.

[chosenfake]

Kool-Aid? Maybe I should ask for some. Though what I'm drinking now tastes pretty awesome. It's not like what I have in the Deathmatch at all. Alcohol isn't that great, you know? It gives me a headache.

[mmm_paradise]

What're you drinking?

[chosenfake]

Sssstrawberry lemonade!

[mmm_paradise]

That does sound very good. [...] I want some.

[chosenfake]

Then go downstairs and get some. It's really good!!

[mmm_paradise]

... Hm. This presents a problem. It's problematic.

[chosenfake]

What's problematic? I guess you can ask the castle for some too, but... I was stuck as a serving ghost for two weeks and it sucked. So I don't do that anymore.

[mmm_paradise]

Ummm... Yes, that would solve my immediate situation. Seeing how the floor's out to get me. Certainly. That would work.

[chosenfake]

The floor's out to get you?

Holy crap. Maybe that's what's supposed to happen this time. The castle's trying to KILL people!

[mmm_paradise]

... That would be very troubling, seeing as most of us are stuck to the floor. With gravity.

[chosenfake]

Gwaaagh! [squeaky squeak-- he's jumping on the bed now] What do we do?!

[mmm_paradise]

Not a single clue. I think we're doomed to die. [sounds cheerful] You should try kool-aid before you die.

[chosenfake]

Y... you're right. I should.

Castle, bring me Kool-Aid. Please. My last request before I die. Before you kill me terribly by sucking me into the floor like a... a floor sucker.

[Ding!]

Here goes nothing.

[gulp gulp gulp]