the living
Earth Verse:
Wide enough to keep you looking
Open enough to keep you moving
Dry enough to keep you honest
Prickly enough to make you tough
Green enough to go on living
Old Enough to give you dreams
~Gary Snyder
There is electricity surging here inside me. Electronic. I feel. The rain comes down in sheets today and I sit piled in a blanket at my computer. Her words are back, my words are back, we can exist ephemerally across the universe through whispered words. It's been so long since I last wrote that my mind barely remembers how to do it anymore. I keep forgetting to take my meds and then the world start to collide and the whispers start. I can't explain it but when I don't take my meds my view of vision starts to jerk around and i get nervous. there are parts of me that want the worlds to collid again i want to climb into them and understand the creatures and understand myself in them. If only I could manage to do this without giving up the life I'm living now. I'm existing so normally now with only a shadow of what I remember hanging on to me. It's like an amputtee limb...i can still sense all the destruction and terror but it's muted by meds. these word are not what i wanted to say at all. during the day i take naps on campus under the oak trees and dream, irridescent dreams, dreams that only the oak trees remember and take into their branches and pass on to the sky. i have a pair of wings that i wear. white feathers. they allow me to fly.
Wide enough to keep you looking
Open enough to keep you moving
Dry enough to keep you honest
Prickly enough to make you tough
Green enough to go on living
Old Enough to give you dreams
~Gary Snyder
There is electricity surging here inside me. Electronic. I feel. The rain comes down in sheets today and I sit piled in a blanket at my computer. Her words are back, my words are back, we can exist ephemerally across the universe through whispered words. It's been so long since I last wrote that my mind barely remembers how to do it anymore. I keep forgetting to take my meds and then the world start to collide and the whispers start. I can't explain it but when I don't take my meds my view of vision starts to jerk around and i get nervous. there are parts of me that want the worlds to collid again i want to climb into them and understand the creatures and understand myself in them. If only I could manage to do this without giving up the life I'm living now. I'm existing so normally now with only a shadow of what I remember hanging on to me. It's like an amputtee limb...i can still sense all the destruction and terror but it's muted by meds. these word are not what i wanted to say at all. during the day i take naps on campus under the oak trees and dream, irridescent dreams, dreams that only the oak trees remember and take into their branches and pass on to the sky. i have a pair of wings that i wear. white feathers. they allow me to fly.