foreign affairs
Despite all of my summer-related angst, I forgot to put my summer plans up here. (Not that it matters, or anything, but really, I just feel like things are official when I post them on the internet.) After being rejected by every last internship (and then some), I decided to go to Ecuador to volunteer. I will be in Quito from June 21 to August 6. Boo yah. Other than the fact that this puts me further away from pretty much everyone in the world I care about (except for Octavia! Octavia will be in Quito at the end of July!), I'm really excited.
This morning, the delusional part of my brain I realized that, ostensibly, my time in Ecuador almost perfectly mirrors The Sound of Music, other than being set in the Andes instead of the Alps. I am a free-spirited and occasionally offensive but generally well-meaning young woman who will be taking care of and tutoring children with absentee parents, except the parents of these children are in prison, not emotionally distanced by money and the death of their spouse. Ecuador's prison system is really screwed up; if someone with children is convicted, the children frequently accompany them to prison and have to live off their meager rations, or go to an orphanage and never see their parents again. Luckily, many religious organizations set up temporary orphanages for these children so that they can be well-cared for until their parents are rehabilitated. I'm working in one that is run by a nunnery in the oldest Catholic Church in Quito. That's right, I'm working with nuns. I can only hope that the Mother Abbess will take me aside and sing "Climb Ev'ry Mountain" to me and help me confront my fears about my relationships and schoolwork and what the heck I'm supposed to do to my life.
I don't want to get married to someone like Captain Von Trapp, though, and since they don't yodel in Ecuador, singing "The Lonely Llama-Herd" with the children is pretty much out, so I guess I'll just have to wait and see what happens. I do hope there's some sort of musical accompaniment for this journey, though.
Also. Apparently there is an alternate universe where I'm really really cool, and that alternate universe is Asheville. And I don't mean cool in the "I actually have friends" way, because that would be what I have at Brown (hooray for friends!) but more in the "stopped on the street by actual in-crowd type people from high school who I haven't seen in months and months and treat me like some sort of mythic being that might deign to have lunch with them if God is kind and merciful" kind of thing. Seriously, this is kind of weird. I hope this doesn't come across as cocky or bitchy; really, it's complete and total amazement. I've heard that the popularity playing field levels out after one leaves an institution, but jeez. Didn't expect it to happen to me at all.
That's all, except for the fact that I need something to do while I'm still here, badly. Left to my own devices, I will alternate between rotting away my brain with television on Youtube and fretting the night away (which almost sounds like twisting the night away, but is a lot less fun and much more destructive, I tell you.) I think I may volunteer with the radio station or the art museum or something. (Must... build... resume/explore career options...) I might try and see if I could freelance copyedit or something, but I have zero experience and so many of the online things are scams. Hmm. Hm hm hm.
Lately I've been wondering about the way I present myself emotionally. So many people have lauded me for the very physical, overt way in which I feel emotion. I'm proud of myself for this, and I'm glad that I don't hold things in, yet sometimes I feel that my expression of emotion causes discomfort to others. What to do?
That's all, really. Enough blather for one night.
This morning, the delusional part of my brain I realized that, ostensibly, my time in Ecuador almost perfectly mirrors The Sound of Music, other than being set in the Andes instead of the Alps. I am a free-spirited and occasionally offensive but generally well-meaning young woman who will be taking care of and tutoring children with absentee parents, except the parents of these children are in prison, not emotionally distanced by money and the death of their spouse. Ecuador's prison system is really screwed up; if someone with children is convicted, the children frequently accompany them to prison and have to live off their meager rations, or go to an orphanage and never see their parents again. Luckily, many religious organizations set up temporary orphanages for these children so that they can be well-cared for until their parents are rehabilitated. I'm working in one that is run by a nunnery in the oldest Catholic Church in Quito. That's right, I'm working with nuns. I can only hope that the Mother Abbess will take me aside and sing "Climb Ev'ry Mountain" to me and help me confront my fears about my relationships and schoolwork and what the heck I'm supposed to do to my life.
I don't want to get married to someone like Captain Von Trapp, though, and since they don't yodel in Ecuador, singing "The Lonely Llama-Herd" with the children is pretty much out, so I guess I'll just have to wait and see what happens. I do hope there's some sort of musical accompaniment for this journey, though.
Also. Apparently there is an alternate universe where I'm really really cool, and that alternate universe is Asheville. And I don't mean cool in the "I actually have friends" way, because that would be what I have at Brown (hooray for friends!) but more in the "stopped on the street by actual in-crowd type people from high school who I haven't seen in months and months and treat me like some sort of mythic being that might deign to have lunch with them if God is kind and merciful" kind of thing. Seriously, this is kind of weird. I hope this doesn't come across as cocky or bitchy; really, it's complete and total amazement. I've heard that the popularity playing field levels out after one leaves an institution, but jeez. Didn't expect it to happen to me at all.
That's all, except for the fact that I need something to do while I'm still here, badly. Left to my own devices, I will alternate between rotting away my brain with television on Youtube and fretting the night away (which almost sounds like twisting the night away, but is a lot less fun and much more destructive, I tell you.) I think I may volunteer with the radio station or the art museum or something. (Must... build... resume/explore career options...) I might try and see if I could freelance copyedit or something, but I have zero experience and so many of the online things are scams. Hmm. Hm hm hm.
Lately I've been wondering about the way I present myself emotionally. So many people have lauded me for the very physical, overt way in which I feel emotion. I'm proud of myself for this, and I'm glad that I don't hold things in, yet sometimes I feel that my expression of emotion causes discomfort to others. What to do?
That's all, really. Enough blather for one night.