...trains and sewing machines...
I'm confused sure.
The entire purpose of falling in love I thought was having someone who shielded you from this crap. Someone who
made you feel so wanted that it didnt matter what else was out there because he was there. And now it's like the
entire world is completely shifted and turned around-but only concerning my relationship. I'm in love for sure,
but how long does that last I wonder?
I thought love, love saves everything it preserves everything into this youthful, timeless, healthy relationship
and you never want to leave and you never can despite anything.
I thought that being in love meant something along the lines of staying permanent in a world of complete and utter,
unstoppable change.
And then you meet someone at the bar.
And you dance...or they want to buy you a drink.
And everything's in reverse now, and you realize anything could happen at this point. That at this point (with
or without the drink) you're still very much in control.
And sometimes it's completely random. A complete change of fate where someone just happens to fall so closely
in you're life you know it's not a mistake.
And you might curse them inside for getting along so well with them, for being attracted in any minor sense to them,
for even thinking things you feel you shouldn't be thinking.
Things get impossible to ignore. To rationalize away in those cases-
it's not the thrill of dancing close, the buzz of alcohol if there even was any, the energy from tons of bodies
packed around you...
it's something else.
And do you ignore that?
Because if you were in love, assuming that in these cases love doesn't form a bubble of indifference around you,
but more so of a safety net where you experience things, wouldn't you pass up these opportunities because you're
satisfied?
Love.
Love.
It's so beautiful, it's the most ridiculous thing to explain. To describe when concerning souls and bodies and
passion and romance...finding something you're own.
It's even more heart wrenching to explain the weight it carries, or to explain what happens when love exists and
the relationship it held together is gone.
Because the saddest thing in the world is still realizing the distance between two bodies and knowing it didn't kill
you. Because with every inhale you can still tell you're alive, and even those breaths are singular and taken in
pain sometimes, you still wish you could use them to form the lonely words "I miss you" and close the gap between
whoever it is you know is missing. Because that is the person you know very well that you breathed-breathe-for.
And in a split second it seems like,
breathing is too much to take.
"You won't catch me around here."
The entire purpose of falling in love I thought was having someone who shielded you from this crap. Someone who
made you feel so wanted that it didnt matter what else was out there because he was there. And now it's like the
entire world is completely shifted and turned around-but only concerning my relationship. I'm in love for sure,
but how long does that last I wonder?
I thought love, love saves everything it preserves everything into this youthful, timeless, healthy relationship
and you never want to leave and you never can despite anything.
I thought that being in love meant something along the lines of staying permanent in a world of complete and utter,
unstoppable change.
And then you meet someone at the bar.
And you dance...or they want to buy you a drink.
And everything's in reverse now, and you realize anything could happen at this point. That at this point (with
or without the drink) you're still very much in control.
And sometimes it's completely random. A complete change of fate where someone just happens to fall so closely
in you're life you know it's not a mistake.
And you might curse them inside for getting along so well with them, for being attracted in any minor sense to them,
for even thinking things you feel you shouldn't be thinking.
Things get impossible to ignore. To rationalize away in those cases-
it's not the thrill of dancing close, the buzz of alcohol if there even was any, the energy from tons of bodies
packed around you...
it's something else.
And do you ignore that?
Because if you were in love, assuming that in these cases love doesn't form a bubble of indifference around you,
but more so of a safety net where you experience things, wouldn't you pass up these opportunities because you're
satisfied?
Love.
Love.
It's so beautiful, it's the most ridiculous thing to explain. To describe when concerning souls and bodies and
passion and romance...finding something you're own.
It's even more heart wrenching to explain the weight it carries, or to explain what happens when love exists and
the relationship it held together is gone.
Because the saddest thing in the world is still realizing the distance between two bodies and knowing it didn't kill
you. Because with every inhale you can still tell you're alive, and even those breaths are singular and taken in
pain sometimes, you still wish you could use them to form the lonely words "I miss you" and close the gap between
whoever it is you know is missing. Because that is the person you know very well that you breathed-breathe-for.
And in a split second it seems like,
breathing is too much to take.
"You won't catch me around here."