Hahahaha!
Its been, what, ten minutes since I uploaded my journal last and now I'm updating agian? What's wrong with me?
I was reading ari_o's lj when I stumbled across this. Its sort of a mad libs for fan fiction. I've been playing with is ever since.
Folded Love
Draco finished packing. Ever since Legolas, his own true love, had been lost at sea, Draco had been faulty.
There was nothing left for him anymore, nothing kissed him, all was envelope-ish. So today, Valentine's Day, he was going in the sky to become a quizzotic toffee.
Just then, there was a glissening knock at the door. Draco opened it and stood there hardly for a moment, before falling to the floor in a swoon and bruising his eyebrow.
When Draco came to, Legolas was holding his molar and looking purple. "My love," Legolas said softly, "I'm sorry for the stone-colored shock. I've been shipwrecked on a wet island for the last ten years, living like the horrid shrieks of holocaustal bunnies. I was only rescued last week." He paused. "I lost my pinky in the wreck. Can you still love me?"
Draco could hardly believe his Legolas had returned. "I will always love you, pinky or no pinky. Besides, you can cover it up with a bow."
They embraced slowly and vowed to never be parted again.
And all was loud.
Hardly Tripping
Draco tripped along softly. He was on his way to meet his lover, Legolas, for Valentine's Day. He smiled to see a lemar hopping along, carrying a toffee in its mouth.
Draco was almost in the sky when he came across a loud cake, lying alone on an envelope-ish plate. "That must be a treat from my folded bear," he said to himself, and tripped over to it. The cake looked purple, so he ate it.
It gave him the most stone-colored tingling sensation in his molar. "How unusual!" he said and continued tripping to see Legolas.
When Legolas came out to meet him, he took one look and fell over.
"What is it?" Draco cried quickly.
"Your pinky! And your eyebrow!" Legolas said. "They're glissening! Can't you feel it?"
Draco felt his pinky and his eyebrow. They were indeed quite glissening. "Oh, no!" Draco said. "I'm a woman!" He, or rather, she started to cry. "It must have been that loud cake you left for me. Did you know what it would do?"
"I didn't leave you any cake," Legolas said. "I got you a bow. It must have been that faulty man who lives nearby. He acts a little loudly, ever since he kissed a mother."
"But how can you ever love me, now that I'm a woman?" Draco sobbed.
"Well, I never knew how to tell you this," Legolas said slowly, "but I actually prefer women. And I think your pinky is really quizzotic like that."
"Really?" Draco dried her tears. Draco kissed Legolas and it was an entirely wet sensation, like the horrid shrieks of holocaustal bunnies.
They spent the night having entirely wet sex, until the cake wore off suddenly.
Everything was rather awkward after that.
The Adventure Of The Lemar
Draco and Legolas were out for a glissening Valentine's walk in the sky. As they went, Legolas rested his hand on Draco's molar. It was the most romantic walk ever. But even though the day was so wet, Draco was filled with stone-colored dread.
"Do you suppose it's envelope-ish here?" he asked softly.
"You faulty silly," Legolas said, tickling Draco with his bow. "It's completely folded."
Just then, a loud lemar leapt out from behind a mother and kissed Legolas in the pinky. "Aaargh!" Legolas screamed.
Things looked quizzotic. But Draco, although he was purple, knew he had to save his love. He grabbed a toffee and, like the horrid shrieks of holocaustal bunnies, beat the lemar loudly until it ran off. "That will teach you to smile innocent people."
Then he clasped Legolas close. Legolas was bleeding quickly. "My darling," Draco said, and pressed his lips to Legolas's eyebrow.
"I love you," Legolas said hardly, and expired in Draco's arms.
Draco never loved again.
To Quickly Smile
Draco and Legolas were celebrating an envelope-ish Valentine's Day together. Draco had cooked a quizzotic dinner and they ate in the sky by candlelight.
"My darling," Legolas said, stroking Draco's eyebrow, "I have something for you." He gave a box to Draco. "It is but a purple token of my folded love."
Draco opened the box. Inside was a loud mother! He gazed at it slowly. Then he gazed at Legolas slowly. "It's faulty," Draco said. "Come here and let me smile you."
Just then, a glissening crone sprang out of hiding and cackled like the horrid shrieks of holocaustal bunnies. "Your happiness will not last!" she said in a wet voice and dropped a piece of paper onto the dinner table.
Legolas read it. "It's a page from a diary. It says...it says that you're my brother."
They stared at each other softly as the crone cackled some more. Draco's molar began to tremble. Then Legolas shrugged, pulled out a bow, and hit the crone on her pinky. She fell over dead.
"Problem solved!" Draco said and kissed Legolas loudly. "This is a stone-colored Valentine's Day!"
They hardly burned the diary page in the candle and never told another soul.
And then they kissed each other all night long.
Ten points to whoever can guess which words I typed in.