[One-shot] Terrified
Title: Terrified
Author: shiroikazex
Group/pairing: Takanoo, Inoo/OC
Genre: Romance, angst
Rating: G
Summary: Takaki has been in love with Inoo since forever, but love doesn't necessarily always get reciprocated. He has a stash of unsent letters in his journal, and the last one is dated when Inoo announced that he was getting married. Based loosely off the song Terrified by Katharine McPhee.
Disclaimer: Not mineee.
Notes: For dreamweavernyx 's Sweet Sixteenth Birthday!
You, by the light
Is the greatest find
In a world full of wrong
You're the thing that's right
~
Dear Inoo-kun,
Hajimemashite! I only met you today, and you helped me out during dance lesson, helping me explain to Sanche-san that I was new. Thank you! He's really one scary guy...
I've seen you on TV before, your name is Inoo Kei, right? I will definitely work hard to be like you and maybe we can be on stage together someday.
I'm shy so I can't really send you this letter, but I did say thank you just now, so I guess maybe we can be friends.
Yuuya
~
Finally made it through the lonely
To the other side
~
Dear Leader-kun,
I can't believe we're in the same group now! Isn't this the best thing ever? Please look after me in the future too. Even though you are younger than me, I feel like you're a lot more mature and... I can rely on you. So yeah.
Maybe we can become good friends in the future too :)
I really really really can't wait till we start filming for Ya-Ya-yah next week. You're close to Yabu-kun and Hikaru-kun right? They seem like cool people, I'd love to get to know them too.
I'll see you at practice tomorrow.
Yuuya
~
You set it again, my heart's in motion
Every word feels like a shooting star
I'm at the edge of my emotions
Watching the shadows burning in the dark
~
Dear Inoo-kun,
Well, this is awkward. How do I even begin...
Well firstly, thanks for your encouragement today. I don't know why but your words and smiles work the best when it comes to cheering me up and pushing me forward.
How long has it been since we met, come to think of it? 2 years? 3 years? I think... I think it's only today that I realized that you are really... pretty. Like, people call you girly pretty all the time but I only really noticed it today. And that your hands are just gorgeous.
I don't know what I'm talking about. You're a guy. Is this weird?
Okay, I'm weird (>.<) Which is why this letter, like all the others, will remain unsent.
I just... can't get your piano out of my head.
Teach me someday?
While you're at it, I'll try to get you to laugh again, it's cute :)
Love,
Cheers,
Yuuya
~
And I'm in love
And I'm terrified
For the first time and the last time
In my only life
~
Dear Kei,
Don't cry, please don't cry. The moment you teared up today in practice, I felt the oddest stirring in my heart, like I just had to run up and take you in my arms.
I... I don't believe this but, I think I love you.
Never mind. This is too strange.
I'm not gay, I've liked girls before, a ton of them. I mean. It'll be weird if I was gay, right?
But then again, what's wrong with that. I still want to protect you. It might just be an extension of friendship. We've never been really as close as I would have wanted us to be, so maybe, maybe, this is just me wanting more than what we have now.
As friends.
I'm just scared of what this is becoming, y'know? Scared of how much you mean to me right now, how much more you mean to me than anyone else.
...
I guess...
I'm glad that we're still together in the same group, at least. I'll still support you from now on.
Yours forever,
Yuuya
~
And this could be good
It's already better than that
And nothing's worse
Than knowing you're holding back
~
Dear Inoo-chan,
So you requested that I call you by that name, I don't mind, I mean, it's been a really long time and it was getting strange that I still address you by "-kun" anyway. That's cool.
We're everything that I could have ever asked for when I was 15. Really. We're... close, I guess, we hang out and stuff, we're still in the same group...
So why do I feel like it's still not enough?
What are you doing to me, Kei?
Confused,
Yuuya
~
I could be all that you need
If you let me try
~
Dear Inoo-chan,
Well, to be honest, when you first introduced us to her, I really couldn't believe that you were, well, straight. Sorry.
Jokes aside, I guess I made it all up in my head. The smiles and everything. I always had thought that maybe you were waiting for the opportune moment for us to get together. Damn all those dramas giving me hope. I even ended up watching those cheap, badly made BL films, you know that? Just to convince myself that maybe, maybe, maybe, being in love with you wasn't so wrong.
So obviously, it was wrong. And I'm glad that I never made a move, because our friendship has been preserved. It's a good thing... right?
But really, Kei, I honestly think that we could have made it work. Maybe I don't have boobs for you to... do things to, but my heart has been yours since god knows how long ago. I love you. Maybe even more than she does.
I just. I don't know. Wish we had a chance.
I'm sorry for the words being so smudgy, but it doesn't matter, it's not like you'll ever read this. I wish you the best.
Love,
Yuuya
~
You set it again, my heart's in motion
Every word feels like a shooting star
I'm at the edge of my emotions
Watching the shadows burning in the dark
~
Dear Kei,
Valentine's.
I love you.
Yuuya
~
And I'm in love
And I'm terrified
For the first time and the last time
In my only
~
Dear Kei,
The last time I wrote in this journal was years ago, when you just started going out with Miko. Ah the good old days.
And now you're getting married!
Congratulations.
Love,
Yuuya
~
I only said it 'cause I mean it
I only mean 'cause it's true
So don't you doubt what I've been dreaming
'Cause it fills me up and holds me close whenever I'm without you
~
Takaki sits on the couch with his bandmates, each dressed in crisp black suits, waiting for the groom to come downstairs. He glances at his watch and wonders for a moment if time was torturing him by passing so slowly, determined to make this day one of the longest and most unbearable ones of his entire life.
But he hides his discomfort. Just as the groom stumbles down the stairs in his own wedding suit. Takaki's breath hitches, despite all the times that he had seen the groom in suits before. Perhaps it was the glow on his face this time round that made the look so much more dazzling. Marriage was a wonderous thing.
"Sorry guys--let's get going--"
"Hold up," Takaki says, and gets up to tackle Inoo's unruly back collar. "Now we're ready."
"Thanks Takaki," Inoo smiles a little nervously. "Goddamn it this is nerve wrecking."
Hikaru faked a sob, "Oh our Inoo-chan, growing up so fast."
"Come on, let's get to the church. If you don't show up on time, there will be hell to pay," Yabu instructed and shooed the lot out of the house and into Inoo's parents' car.
"Or one of us can show up earlier than Inoo does and marry Miko-chan ourselves--"
"Watch your mouth, Yaotome, that's my wife you're talking about."
"Sorry."
~
You set it again, my heart's in motion
Every word feels like a shooting star
~
It is a small chapel, decorated with cream banners and white roses (the bride's favourite flowers, so it seemed), but nonetheless it looked perfect. The press has been shielded 2 blocks down, courtsey of a relative of Inoo's that worked with the police department, and the place is quiet apart from the excited murmuring that hangs in the air.
Takaki sits in the second row, looking at the congregation right in front of him. Inoo stands right up front, obviously nervous from the way that he is wringing his hands and shaking his foot a little. Takaki manages to catch his eye and smiles reassuringly. Seeing the smile echoed, he sits back and awaits the arrival of the bride.
~
I'm at the edge of my emotions
Watching the shadows burning in the dark
~
The march plays, the crowd stands, and the bride strolls in, arm in arm with her father, looking stunning and stunned at the same time. Takaki notices the smile that spreads across Inoo's face the moment she walked in. One that stood apart from all the smiles that were ever directed at him.
"We have gathered here today to witness the union of these two people in holy matrimony..."
He watches the scene unfold before him like a movie. Kohei, being the best man, stands right behind Inoo looking just as nervous. Vows are exchanged with Inoo stumbling over his simple line of "I do", then comes the rings, and then the kiss.
Takaki lowers his eyes.
~
And I'm in love
And I'm terrified
~
He escapes to the courtyard just outside the ballroom where the reception is being held, and breathes in the night air, crisp and piercing, a stark contrast to the dull, numbing pain that the events of that day was bringing him
He had expected a sharp stab to the chest, and the termination of his years of one-sided devotion, but his wish of a quick end to it all was not granted. Instead, here he was, still encapsulated by a cloud of dulled pain, as if to shield him from reality.
"Yo."
He needs not turn around to know who had spoken.
"Shouldn't you be inside?"
"I could say the same about you," Inoo chuckles, and takes a seat on the bench beside Takaki. "What's up?"
"Nothing. Too many people."
"You've never complained about crowds before."
"I blame the suit. I can hardly breathe in this thing."
"You either need a diet, or a bigger suit."
"...Thanks, man."
"Always welcome."
They sit in silence for a few moments, and Takaki begs, pleads for time to freeze but it doesn't.
"I guess we should head back in. Congratulations by the way."
Inoo smiles in the dim light, and Takaki forces back the verbal vomit building up in his throat.
"Thanks. I can't wait till you guys get married too."
Strike 1.
"Well, we'll see about that."
"Aww, I'm sure your wife-to-be would be as drop-dead gorgeous as you are."
Strike 2.
Takaki laughs.
"You go on ahead first, I'm gonna stay out here for a bit longer. For a room that big, it's actually pretty stuffy."
"Okay," Inoo turns to leave. "Enjoy yourself!"
He waits, waits till Inoo took about 10 steps forward, and he lets out a single phrase that slips his control. Inoo suddenly turns with a puzzled expression.
"Did you say something?"
"No? You must be imagining things. Blame it on the alcohol, this is some pretty good champagne you're serving."
Inoo shrugs and continues to walk back into the ballroom.
Strike 3.
~
For the first time and the last time
~
The pain fades just as Takaki downs the last drop of his champagne, just as the wind carried his confession to the distant corners of the land, never to be recovered.
~
In my only.... life
~END~
And I am henceforth terribly sorry that a birthday fic had turned into angst. I've got more coming up soon so stay tuned!
Author: shiroikazex
Group/pairing: Takanoo, Inoo/OC
Genre: Romance, angst
Rating: G
Summary: Takaki has been in love with Inoo since forever, but love doesn't necessarily always get reciprocated. He has a stash of unsent letters in his journal, and the last one is dated when Inoo announced that he was getting married. Based loosely off the song Terrified by Katharine McPhee.
Disclaimer: Not mineee.
Notes: For dreamweavernyx 's Sweet Sixteenth Birthday!
You, by the light
Is the greatest find
In a world full of wrong
You're the thing that's right
~
Dear Inoo-kun,
Hajimemashite! I only met you today, and you helped me out during dance lesson, helping me explain to Sanche-san that I was new. Thank you! He's really one scary guy...
I've seen you on TV before, your name is Inoo Kei, right? I will definitely work hard to be like you and maybe we can be on stage together someday.
I'm shy so I can't really send you this letter, but I did say thank you just now, so I guess maybe we can be friends.
Yuuya
~
Finally made it through the lonely
To the other side
~
Dear Leader-kun,
I can't believe we're in the same group now! Isn't this the best thing ever? Please look after me in the future too. Even though you are younger than me, I feel like you're a lot more mature and... I can rely on you. So yeah.
Maybe we can become good friends in the future too :)
I really really really can't wait till we start filming for Ya-Ya-yah next week. You're close to Yabu-kun and Hikaru-kun right? They seem like cool people, I'd love to get to know them too.
I'll see you at practice tomorrow.
Yuuya
~
You set it again, my heart's in motion
Every word feels like a shooting star
I'm at the edge of my emotions
Watching the shadows burning in the dark
~
Dear Inoo-kun,
Well, this is awkward. How do I even begin...
Well firstly, thanks for your encouragement today. I don't know why but your words and smiles work the best when it comes to cheering me up and pushing me forward.
How long has it been since we met, come to think of it? 2 years? 3 years? I think... I think it's only today that I realized that you are really... pretty. Like, people call you girly pretty all the time but I only really noticed it today. And that your hands are just gorgeous.
I don't know what I'm talking about. You're a guy. Is this weird?
Okay, I'm weird (>.<) Which is why this letter, like all the others, will remain unsent.
I just... can't get your piano out of my head.
Teach me someday?
While you're at it, I'll try to get you to laugh again, it's cute :)
Love,
Cheers,
Yuuya
~
And I'm in love
And I'm terrified
For the first time and the last time
In my only life
~
Dear Kei,
Don't cry, please don't cry. The moment you teared up today in practice, I felt the oddest stirring in my heart, like I just had to run up and take you in my arms.
I... I don't believe this but, I think I love you.
Never mind. This is too strange.
I'm not gay, I've liked girls before, a ton of them. I mean. It'll be weird if I was gay, right?
But then again, what's wrong with that. I still want to protect you. It might just be an extension of friendship. We've never been really as close as I would have wanted us to be, so maybe, maybe, this is just me wanting more than what we have now.
As friends.
I'm just scared of what this is becoming, y'know? Scared of how much you mean to me right now, how much more you mean to me than anyone else.
...
I guess...
I'm glad that we're still together in the same group, at least. I'll still support you from now on.
Yours forever,
Yuuya
~
And this could be good
It's already better than that
And nothing's worse
Than knowing you're holding back
~
Dear Inoo-chan,
So you requested that I call you by that name, I don't mind, I mean, it's been a really long time and it was getting strange that I still address you by "-kun" anyway. That's cool.
We're everything that I could have ever asked for when I was 15. Really. We're... close, I guess, we hang out and stuff, we're still in the same group...
So why do I feel like it's still not enough?
What are you doing to me, Kei?
Confused,
Yuuya
~
I could be all that you need
If you let me try
~
Dear Inoo-chan,
Well, to be honest, when you first introduced us to her, I really couldn't believe that you were, well, straight. Sorry.
Jokes aside, I guess I made it all up in my head. The smiles and everything. I always had thought that maybe you were waiting for the opportune moment for us to get together. Damn all those dramas giving me hope. I even ended up watching those cheap, badly made BL films, you know that? Just to convince myself that maybe, maybe, maybe, being in love with you wasn't so wrong.
So obviously, it was wrong. And I'm glad that I never made a move, because our friendship has been preserved. It's a good thing... right?
But really, Kei, I honestly think that we could have made it work. Maybe I don't have boobs for you to... do things to, but my heart has been yours since god knows how long ago. I love you. Maybe even more than she does.
I just. I don't know. Wish we had a chance.
I'm sorry for the words being so smudgy, but it doesn't matter, it's not like you'll ever read this. I wish you the best.
Love,
Yuuya
~
You set it again, my heart's in motion
Every word feels like a shooting star
I'm at the edge of my emotions
Watching the shadows burning in the dark
~
Dear Kei,
Valentine's.
I love you.
Yuuya
~
And I'm in love
And I'm terrified
For the first time and the last time
In my only
~
Dear Kei,
The last time I wrote in this journal was years ago, when you just started going out with Miko. Ah the good old days.
And now you're getting married!
Congratulations.
Love,
Yuuya
~
I only said it 'cause I mean it
I only mean 'cause it's true
So don't you doubt what I've been dreaming
'Cause it fills me up and holds me close whenever I'm without you
~
Takaki sits on the couch with his bandmates, each dressed in crisp black suits, waiting for the groom to come downstairs. He glances at his watch and wonders for a moment if time was torturing him by passing so slowly, determined to make this day one of the longest and most unbearable ones of his entire life.
But he hides his discomfort. Just as the groom stumbles down the stairs in his own wedding suit. Takaki's breath hitches, despite all the times that he had seen the groom in suits before. Perhaps it was the glow on his face this time round that made the look so much more dazzling. Marriage was a wonderous thing.
"Sorry guys--let's get going--"
"Hold up," Takaki says, and gets up to tackle Inoo's unruly back collar. "Now we're ready."
"Thanks Takaki," Inoo smiles a little nervously. "Goddamn it this is nerve wrecking."
Hikaru faked a sob, "Oh our Inoo-chan, growing up so fast."
"Come on, let's get to the church. If you don't show up on time, there will be hell to pay," Yabu instructed and shooed the lot out of the house and into Inoo's parents' car.
"Or one of us can show up earlier than Inoo does and marry Miko-chan ourselves--"
"Watch your mouth, Yaotome, that's my wife you're talking about."
"Sorry."
~
You set it again, my heart's in motion
Every word feels like a shooting star
~
It is a small chapel, decorated with cream banners and white roses (the bride's favourite flowers, so it seemed), but nonetheless it looked perfect. The press has been shielded 2 blocks down, courtsey of a relative of Inoo's that worked with the police department, and the place is quiet apart from the excited murmuring that hangs in the air.
Takaki sits in the second row, looking at the congregation right in front of him. Inoo stands right up front, obviously nervous from the way that he is wringing his hands and shaking his foot a little. Takaki manages to catch his eye and smiles reassuringly. Seeing the smile echoed, he sits back and awaits the arrival of the bride.
~
I'm at the edge of my emotions
Watching the shadows burning in the dark
~
The march plays, the crowd stands, and the bride strolls in, arm in arm with her father, looking stunning and stunned at the same time. Takaki notices the smile that spreads across Inoo's face the moment she walked in. One that stood apart from all the smiles that were ever directed at him.
"We have gathered here today to witness the union of these two people in holy matrimony..."
He watches the scene unfold before him like a movie. Kohei, being the best man, stands right behind Inoo looking just as nervous. Vows are exchanged with Inoo stumbling over his simple line of "I do", then comes the rings, and then the kiss.
Takaki lowers his eyes.
~
And I'm in love
And I'm terrified
~
He escapes to the courtyard just outside the ballroom where the reception is being held, and breathes in the night air, crisp and piercing, a stark contrast to the dull, numbing pain that the events of that day was bringing him
He had expected a sharp stab to the chest, and the termination of his years of one-sided devotion, but his wish of a quick end to it all was not granted. Instead, here he was, still encapsulated by a cloud of dulled pain, as if to shield him from reality.
"Yo."
He needs not turn around to know who had spoken.
"Shouldn't you be inside?"
"I could say the same about you," Inoo chuckles, and takes a seat on the bench beside Takaki. "What's up?"
"Nothing. Too many people."
"You've never complained about crowds before."
"I blame the suit. I can hardly breathe in this thing."
"You either need a diet, or a bigger suit."
"...Thanks, man."
"Always welcome."
They sit in silence for a few moments, and Takaki begs, pleads for time to freeze but it doesn't.
"I guess we should head back in. Congratulations by the way."
Inoo smiles in the dim light, and Takaki forces back the verbal vomit building up in his throat.
"Thanks. I can't wait till you guys get married too."
Strike 1.
"Well, we'll see about that."
"Aww, I'm sure your wife-to-be would be as drop-dead gorgeous as you are."
Strike 2.
Takaki laughs.
"You go on ahead first, I'm gonna stay out here for a bit longer. For a room that big, it's actually pretty stuffy."
"Okay," Inoo turns to leave. "Enjoy yourself!"
He waits, waits till Inoo took about 10 steps forward, and he lets out a single phrase that slips his control. Inoo suddenly turns with a puzzled expression.
"Did you say something?"
"No? You must be imagining things. Blame it on the alcohol, this is some pretty good champagne you're serving."
Inoo shrugs and continues to walk back into the ballroom.
Strike 3.
~
For the first time and the last time
~
The pain fades just as Takaki downs the last drop of his champagne, just as the wind carried his confession to the distant corners of the land, never to be recovered.
~
In my only.... life
~END~
And I am henceforth terribly sorry that a birthday fic had turned into angst. I've got more coming up soon so stay tuned!