pictures and kittens and things
Hello~ \(=A=)/ It's almost 4AM~
I've pretty much given up on trying to fix my jetlag and have been waking up at 4pm and sleeping after dawn every night since I got back. On the bright side, this is keeping me from going anywhere and wasting my money on bored daytime walks. Can't make those frequent impulse purchases if I'm not awake while the stores are open to do so! *A* I also lost another 5lbs. When I wake up in the evening, my body goes "oh, it's evening, so it's dinner time". So I eat my dinner and then go through the rest of the night until dawn without really getting hungry for a full meal (just peanut snacks~). Wii Fit is telling me that if I lose one more pound I will be underweight, though. Whoops.
I've just been packing boxes and trying to lighten up my load before moving. I'm such a packrat and keep EVERYTHING, especially if it was given to me. I have a big drawer full of nothing but birthday and christmas cards and refuse to throw any of them away. Even if half of them were sent out of obligation by family members who talk to me once a year, reading them makes me happy. I found the last few cards my grandma sent to me before she died, too. The last one was a get well card. She was dying. I had a cold. She was the one who sent me a get well card. ;_; It's been almost one year since she passed away and I miss her every day.
Now that I have time to myself again after being busy with school and travel, I've been feeling lonely. I feel like my internet friends have disappeared or forgotten me. Offline friends have all left me to graduate. Old school buddies never contact me, and I'm never invited to get-togethers. I feel like I've always been the forgettable fifth wheel in every social group I've ever been a part of; that side person who's just kind of there and is only invited along out of courtesy when the group is unfortunate enough to have me hear that they're going somewhere. Teachers used to mark me absent frequently on days I was there because they didn't even notice me. People in classes have told me on the last days of class that they just realized I was in that class. I remember the day I graduated from elementary school, our teacher had prepared little special awards for each of her students, paired with a mini speech about what made us unique and memorable to her. Some kids got a little award/speech saying "I'll always remember you for the bright shirts you wore" or "for your funny personality" or "for the way you cheered everyone up with the way you said hi each day" or so on. The brief speech she gave to me was to tell me she thought I was almost exactly like another student and she always mixed us up. Even at school in Japan, when I thought I'd found a group of friends, I bought a cell phone to get in touch with them. They said they were going to Tokyo as a group for spring break and that we should get together and have fun. I lost my phone the day of my trip and couldn't send them mail so I could find them in the city and spent the whole time thinking "they must be wondering why I won't respond to their mails and come meet them". When I found my phone after the trip, it didn't have a single message from them; even though we said we'd tour the city together, they didn't even try to contact me to do something. orz
I don't know why I am even typing this lkdsjgdsg
it must be because I am finally going back to live in my hometown and feel awkward because I've got no one looking forward to seeing me there except my mom. /)_(\ why am i such a social failure aaaaaa
On the bright side, though, I got OK's from both my mom and R to let R spend his whole winter break with me in Texas. \o/ I don't know what he can DO there all break, but at least he won't be alone for Christmas.
i feel stupid for writing everything above, but at the same time it feels good to get it off my chest. orz
welp uh
here are some.. some PHOTOS
some of Japan, some of notJapan
under another cut, because I don't want them hanging out with the other cut. The ↑↑other cut↑↑ is an asshole.
the view from the window of the room I stayed in this summer
the city was so pretty~
I saw a bird outside of my window one day and decided to take a picture of it
WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU GOING BIRD
note the rice field in the background; they were all over the place. ricericerice.
a little farming town.
my second attempt (of three) at the ikebana class
the teacher was so so so cute ;_;
she said to come back to her class to say hi next time I'm in Japan if she's still alive orz (102 years old..!)
she was really happy to have a Random American in her class, haha... R's mom says she proudly tells everyone~
well yeah since you poop with your pants down I guess the toilet IS automatically flashed
from a flower park by the ocean
THE OCEAN
(aka "That Place Where Whales Live", as a certain 5-year-old called it)
Shibuya. I hear it's the world's busiest crosswalk.
If it's like this in the middle of a weekday I don't even want to know what weekends are like.
the good 'ol ichimarukyu
I think the poster on it that day was of Harry Potter.
That looks like a Potter eyebrow.
back in the US, we have a cute little four-legged friend in the apartment now~
I seem to be allergic to cats.
Fate is cruel. orz I can't get close to my favorite animal...
I guess I never noticed with my own cat long ago because by the time I was old enough to
know what pet allergies were, I was already used to her.
cute but evil. This is the last thing I will see before I die.
"Oh, were you using this? :O "
She loves my laptop. It's nice and warm and gives her a cursor to chase.
I just wish her paws would stay clear of the power button. orz
She's also managed to alt+f4 out of applications with her paws...
I'm getting better at cooking. *A*
I made some boiled pork hamburg. It was soft and sweet and lovely~
that's all I've got. :T
Crap to do before I move:
* list and sell my large belongings (someone pleasepleaseplease buy my junk aaa)
* try to finish a game before I make eyes at the new games coming out this month (especially Layton and Dissidia). Lost Odyssey and Suikoden Tierkreis are currently at the top of that list.
* beat the new Tales of Monkey Island Game DONE and it was lovely ;w; I'm so glad they brought Monkey Island back to life. Though I think for the next installment I'll go with the PC version instead of the Wii. Even though my PC is slow and crappy, the text on the Wii version is tiny and illegible and the controls kind of stink.
* finish packing. Pretty much all that's left is clothes, and I have no idea what I'm going to do with them. Every piece of clothing I bought before 2008 is too big for me now but I feel like an ass throwing out clothes I barely wore. I'm the type of person who will have lots of clothes everywhere but will only wear the same 3 or 4 outfits every day.
* learn how to be a tolerable human being
* re-learn the english language
* fix my badly-damaged body clock
why am i still awake help bye
i am craving mcdonalds breakfast so much that I am tempted to stay up until they open for breakfast and then walk the mile to their nearest location. DX
I've pretty much given up on trying to fix my jetlag and have been waking up at 4pm and sleeping after dawn every night since I got back. On the bright side, this is keeping me from going anywhere and wasting my money on bored daytime walks. Can't make those frequent impulse purchases if I'm not awake while the stores are open to do so! *A* I also lost another 5lbs. When I wake up in the evening, my body goes "oh, it's evening, so it's dinner time". So I eat my dinner and then go through the rest of the night until dawn without really getting hungry for a full meal (just peanut snacks~). Wii Fit is telling me that if I lose one more pound I will be underweight, though. Whoops.
I've just been packing boxes and trying to lighten up my load before moving. I'm such a packrat and keep EVERYTHING, especially if it was given to me. I have a big drawer full of nothing but birthday and christmas cards and refuse to throw any of them away. Even if half of them were sent out of obligation by family members who talk to me once a year, reading them makes me happy. I found the last few cards my grandma sent to me before she died, too. The last one was a get well card. She was dying. I had a cold. She was the one who sent me a get well card. ;_; It's been almost one year since she passed away and I miss her every day.
Now that I have time to myself again after being busy with school and travel, I've been feeling lonely. I feel like my internet friends have disappeared or forgotten me. Offline friends have all left me to graduate. Old school buddies never contact me, and I'm never invited to get-togethers. I feel like I've always been the forgettable fifth wheel in every social group I've ever been a part of; that side person who's just kind of there and is only invited along out of courtesy when the group is unfortunate enough to have me hear that they're going somewhere. Teachers used to mark me absent frequently on days I was there because they didn't even notice me. People in classes have told me on the last days of class that they just realized I was in that class. I remember the day I graduated from elementary school, our teacher had prepared little special awards for each of her students, paired with a mini speech about what made us unique and memorable to her. Some kids got a little award/speech saying "I'll always remember you for the bright shirts you wore" or "for your funny personality" or "for the way you cheered everyone up with the way you said hi each day" or so on. The brief speech she gave to me was to tell me she thought I was almost exactly like another student and she always mixed us up. Even at school in Japan, when I thought I'd found a group of friends, I bought a cell phone to get in touch with them. They said they were going to Tokyo as a group for spring break and that we should get together and have fun. I lost my phone the day of my trip and couldn't send them mail so I could find them in the city and spent the whole time thinking "they must be wondering why I won't respond to their mails and come meet them". When I found my phone after the trip, it didn't have a single message from them; even though we said we'd tour the city together, they didn't even try to contact me to do something. orz
I don't know why I am even typing this lkdsjgdsg
it must be because I am finally going back to live in my hometown and feel awkward because I've got no one looking forward to seeing me there except my mom. /)_(\ why am i such a social failure aaaaaa
On the bright side, though, I got OK's from both my mom and R to let R spend his whole winter break with me in Texas. \o/ I don't know what he can DO there all break, but at least he won't be alone for Christmas.
i feel stupid for writing everything above, but at the same time it feels good to get it off my chest. orz
welp uh
here are some.. some PHOTOS
some of Japan, some of notJapan
under another cut, because I don't want them hanging out with the other cut. The ↑↑other cut↑↑ is an asshole.
the view from the window of the room I stayed in this summer
the city was so pretty~
I saw a bird outside of my window one day and decided to take a picture of it
WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU GOING BIRD
note the rice field in the background; they were all over the place. ricericerice.
a little farming town.
my second attempt (of three) at the ikebana class
the teacher was so so so cute ;_;
she said to come back to her class to say hi next time I'm in Japan if she's still alive orz (102 years old..!)
she was really happy to have a Random American in her class, haha... R's mom says she proudly tells everyone~
well yeah since you poop with your pants down I guess the toilet IS automatically flashed
from a flower park by the ocean
THE OCEAN
(aka "That Place Where Whales Live", as a certain 5-year-old called it)
Shibuya. I hear it's the world's busiest crosswalk.
If it's like this in the middle of a weekday I don't even want to know what weekends are like.
the good 'ol ichimarukyu
I think the poster on it that day was of Harry Potter.
That looks like a Potter eyebrow.
back in the US, we have a cute little four-legged friend in the apartment now~
I seem to be allergic to cats.
Fate is cruel. orz I can't get close to my favorite animal...
I guess I never noticed with my own cat long ago because by the time I was old enough to
know what pet allergies were, I was already used to her.
cute but evil. This is the last thing I will see before I die.
"Oh, were you using this? :O "
She loves my laptop. It's nice and warm and gives her a cursor to chase.
I just wish her paws would stay clear of the power button. orz
She's also managed to alt+f4 out of applications with her paws...
I'm getting better at cooking. *A*
I made some boiled pork hamburg. It was soft and sweet and lovely~
that's all I've got. :T
Crap to do before I move:
* list and sell my large belongings (someone pleasepleaseplease buy my junk aaa)
* try to finish a game before I make eyes at the new games coming out this month (especially Layton and Dissidia). Lost Odyssey and Suikoden Tierkreis are currently at the top of that list.
* beat the new Tales of Monkey Island Game DONE and it was lovely ;w; I'm so glad they brought Monkey Island back to life. Though I think for the next installment I'll go with the PC version instead of the Wii. Even though my PC is slow and crappy, the text on the Wii version is tiny and illegible and the controls kind of stink.
* finish packing. Pretty much all that's left is clothes, and I have no idea what I'm going to do with them. Every piece of clothing I bought before 2008 is too big for me now but I feel like an ass throwing out clothes I barely wore. I'm the type of person who will have lots of clothes everywhere but will only wear the same 3 or 4 outfits every day.
* learn how to be a tolerable human being
* re-learn the english language
* fix my badly-damaged body clock
why am i still awake help bye
i am craving mcdonalds breakfast so much that I am tempted to stay up until they open for breakfast and then walk the mile to their nearest location. DX