I'd just moved into a Haunted House.
Thanks to Gene Simmons for post title
So, anyways, lesee.
I got a job at a haunted house event. I basically get to spend every weekend in October working for minimum wage. It's fun, but very physically demanding.
Basically, I get paid to wear a latex mask and gloves plus costume and scare people. It's a maze, so imy job consists of bursting from hiding, scare, go back to start and repeat. And if you think that doesn't sound hard, you're a fucking jackass donkey fucker idiotic moron. It's both repetative and physical plus, you have a mask on which makes you sweat like a stuck pig and traps perspiration on your face. Furthermore, I have to burst into motion and then stop very quickly. That takes energy. Try it yourself. Go from standing to a run, run for about five or ten steps, and then stop and do that while growling, snarling, and barking. No walking except to go back to starting point. That's pretty much what I do while in costume for five or six hours a night.
Biological fact: Your body's primary places to vent heat are your head, hands, and feet and I have all three covered. Socks and heavy boots on my feet, latex on hands and face. Arms, torso, and legs all covered. All that, and the mask over my face to restrict breathing. About the only vent space is the back of my head.
So yes, hard work. Exhasting, but fun. Even though I pretty much feel like the walking dead by the end.
Even more disgusting, sweat pools in the bottom of the mask, so on those rare moments when I push it up to breathe, it drips into my hair. Ewwwwwww.
In trying to beat the sweat, I've been expermenting. Fingerless cloth gloves on my hands under the bask seems to help, as does not wearing one of my costume shirts. Funny story, there, actually.
I have this thing about stuff anywhere near my neck. Namely, it makes me freak. I've ruined the collars of t-shirts because I keep pulling them down. I buy my dress shirts a size too large simply so I can wear dress clothes without feeling confined. I'm not as bad as I used to be, but the thought alone of something being tight against my neck is enough to make me twitchy and nervous.
Anyways, so my orginal costume was jeans, the mask and gloves, a flannel shirt, and a costume shirt. I couldn't wear the costume shirt becaue it kept riding up and pushing on my neck. So I went to Wardrobe, explained that it was choking me, and if it was okay with them, I'd just wear a black t-shirt. They nodded.
That was Wednesday. Friday, I get the costume and find that the costume shirt has been replaced with a Hooters shirt. With the price tag still attached.
I lol'd.
But as far as I'm concerned, it gave me my character's orgin. See, he was at a Hooters and being a dick, hit on the waitress a little too much, so she bit him. Bad luck that she turned out to be a werewolf. Which he found out a month later when the full moon started having a very odd effect on him.
Downside, too many guests see the logo and feel moved to comment on it which ruins the moment.
Saturday must have been dick day, because it seemed like every single asshole, bitch, and idiot in the area rolled in. Most of the people who came through my maze would tell me I wasn't scary, or not react, and one little girl told me my growl was pathetic. In the Toy zone, people ripped the toys off the walls and threw them at the performers, some of the women in other areas got groped. In my area, some little shithead kid snatched the mask off one of the other guys and ran off, tossing the mask into the bushes. He got caught though. That's just the stuff I heard about or saw. I'm sure there was more.
After work, a few of us went back to Shadow's. Shadow is a legend among the performers. He's this big guy, nice as can be, but he also holds the record for making guests wet themselves. On average, he will make at least ten guests wet or crap themselves per night. I've never actually seen him in action, but spiffy_gal has. Apparently, he's quite the sight.
So we get there. squeeful claims a blanket and a corner of the couch and makes happy noises. Another one, who everyone calls Bubbles, grabs a mat, lays it on the floor, and falls on it face first, uncaring if she suffocates to death. It was kind of amusing in a morbid sort of way.
After an hour or so, I forced myself to rise and get on the bike to go home, where I ate and then fell asleep.
Sunday was a slow day. Mom had got me some gel insoles for my boots, but my feet were already so sore, I can't tell if they did any good. lepetitemort swears by these as the best insoles out there, so if the money frees itself up, we'll see.
Option two is too start packing sneakers, but that's just one more thing to haul around and I'm not sure I want to do that.
Option three is to get some hightops. Because of the motorcycle, my footwear MUST cover my ankles. No exceptions and while the steel-toed combat boots I usually wear will do the job, they're ill-suited to the haunting job. But again, that's money I don't really have at the present time.
Today, I spent pretty much all day asleep. After two or three naps, I felt like my old self again. Finally.
And I get to do this for the next three weeks. Wheee! Ah well, its a badly needed paycheck and I can think of worse jobs. Besides, the screams of the guests are worth it.
So, anyways, lesee.
I got a job at a haunted house event. I basically get to spend every weekend in October working for minimum wage. It's fun, but very physically demanding.
Basically, I get paid to wear a latex mask and gloves plus costume and scare people. It's a maze, so imy job consists of bursting from hiding, scare, go back to start and repeat. And if you think that doesn't sound hard, you're a fucking jackass donkey fucker idiotic moron. It's both repetative and physical plus, you have a mask on which makes you sweat like a stuck pig and traps perspiration on your face. Furthermore, I have to burst into motion and then stop very quickly. That takes energy. Try it yourself. Go from standing to a run, run for about five or ten steps, and then stop and do that while growling, snarling, and barking. No walking except to go back to starting point. That's pretty much what I do while in costume for five or six hours a night.
Biological fact: Your body's primary places to vent heat are your head, hands, and feet and I have all three covered. Socks and heavy boots on my feet, latex on hands and face. Arms, torso, and legs all covered. All that, and the mask over my face to restrict breathing. About the only vent space is the back of my head.
So yes, hard work. Exhasting, but fun. Even though I pretty much feel like the walking dead by the end.
Even more disgusting, sweat pools in the bottom of the mask, so on those rare moments when I push it up to breathe, it drips into my hair. Ewwwwwww.
In trying to beat the sweat, I've been expermenting. Fingerless cloth gloves on my hands under the bask seems to help, as does not wearing one of my costume shirts. Funny story, there, actually.
I have this thing about stuff anywhere near my neck. Namely, it makes me freak. I've ruined the collars of t-shirts because I keep pulling them down. I buy my dress shirts a size too large simply so I can wear dress clothes without feeling confined. I'm not as bad as I used to be, but the thought alone of something being tight against my neck is enough to make me twitchy and nervous.
Anyways, so my orginal costume was jeans, the mask and gloves, a flannel shirt, and a costume shirt. I couldn't wear the costume shirt becaue it kept riding up and pushing on my neck. So I went to Wardrobe, explained that it was choking me, and if it was okay with them, I'd just wear a black t-shirt. They nodded.
That was Wednesday. Friday, I get the costume and find that the costume shirt has been replaced with a Hooters shirt. With the price tag still attached.
I lol'd.
But as far as I'm concerned, it gave me my character's orgin. See, he was at a Hooters and being a dick, hit on the waitress a little too much, so she bit him. Bad luck that she turned out to be a werewolf. Which he found out a month later when the full moon started having a very odd effect on him.
Downside, too many guests see the logo and feel moved to comment on it which ruins the moment.
Saturday must have been dick day, because it seemed like every single asshole, bitch, and idiot in the area rolled in. Most of the people who came through my maze would tell me I wasn't scary, or not react, and one little girl told me my growl was pathetic. In the Toy zone, people ripped the toys off the walls and threw them at the performers, some of the women in other areas got groped. In my area, some little shithead kid snatched the mask off one of the other guys and ran off, tossing the mask into the bushes. He got caught though. That's just the stuff I heard about or saw. I'm sure there was more.
After work, a few of us went back to Shadow's. Shadow is a legend among the performers. He's this big guy, nice as can be, but he also holds the record for making guests wet themselves. On average, he will make at least ten guests wet or crap themselves per night. I've never actually seen him in action, but spiffy_gal has. Apparently, he's quite the sight.
So we get there. squeeful claims a blanket and a corner of the couch and makes happy noises. Another one, who everyone calls Bubbles, grabs a mat, lays it on the floor, and falls on it face first, uncaring if she suffocates to death. It was kind of amusing in a morbid sort of way.
After an hour or so, I forced myself to rise and get on the bike to go home, where I ate and then fell asleep.
Sunday was a slow day. Mom had got me some gel insoles for my boots, but my feet were already so sore, I can't tell if they did any good. lepetitemort swears by these as the best insoles out there, so if the money frees itself up, we'll see.
Option two is too start packing sneakers, but that's just one more thing to haul around and I'm not sure I want to do that.
Option three is to get some hightops. Because of the motorcycle, my footwear MUST cover my ankles. No exceptions and while the steel-toed combat boots I usually wear will do the job, they're ill-suited to the haunting job. But again, that's money I don't really have at the present time.
Today, I spent pretty much all day asleep. After two or three naps, I felt like my old self again. Finally.
And I get to do this for the next three weeks. Wheee! Ah well, its a badly needed paycheck and I can think of worse jobs. Besides, the screams of the guests are worth it.