More post-graduation existential delima drama
So things and stuff. I need to write this quickily so I can do something productive while I'm borrowing Oni's computer. She's at class and I'm using the wireless at SU, which is kinda weird but nice to be back at, sittin' and chillin at Pigott. Weird man.
Anyway, have been kind of bumbed out the last couple of days. I've been out of school for six months, maybe seven and apart from moving out of my parents house I haven't really done ANYTHING. I miss Tablet a lot. I'm still job hunting and I've been job hunting for companies and positions that are still of no real interest to me other than the money and hopefully benefits they would provide. Still haven't gotten anything. I guess I'm bumbed out because I'm fucking sick of being the Winonna Ryder character in Reality Bites (only I'm pretty sure I could define irony). I'm itching to travel again. I'm itching to get started on doing something with my life but I'm not sure how. The worst part is that all the mindless tasks I do at work leave me stuck with my own mind, and though I'm usually down with mindless tasks becasue I can think about things I want to write, good memorys and so on, on bad days all I'm stuck with is thinking about the stuff that makes me feel bad--how that bastard never called, how I'm not doing anything with my writing, how time keeps going faster and faster, the months are flying by, and I haven't gone anywhere or done anything with myself worthwhile. It's not all just being depressed, it's a kind of anxiety. I just need to do something so I can stop holding my breath, if nothing else.
Anyway. Bitch bitch bitch.
The nice news is that I'm cat sitting for Ginger and having a cat around the appartment is so nice. I missed it a lot, a fuzzy little friend to sit and sleep on you and walk all over your keybaord when you're trying to write. It's also nice to come home and never really feel alone even when the roomates are out. I can't afford it right now but I need to have a kitty again, they really do brighten up the home life so much,...when they're not being a little pain in the ass.
Off to go be all productive like on the internet now. No my LJ and Myspace for Mir. Focus, Mir, Focus.
Anyway, have been kind of bumbed out the last couple of days. I've been out of school for six months, maybe seven and apart from moving out of my parents house I haven't really done ANYTHING. I miss Tablet a lot. I'm still job hunting and I've been job hunting for companies and positions that are still of no real interest to me other than the money and hopefully benefits they would provide. Still haven't gotten anything. I guess I'm bumbed out because I'm fucking sick of being the Winonna Ryder character in Reality Bites (only I'm pretty sure I could define irony). I'm itching to travel again. I'm itching to get started on doing something with my life but I'm not sure how. The worst part is that all the mindless tasks I do at work leave me stuck with my own mind, and though I'm usually down with mindless tasks becasue I can think about things I want to write, good memorys and so on, on bad days all I'm stuck with is thinking about the stuff that makes me feel bad--how that bastard never called, how I'm not doing anything with my writing, how time keeps going faster and faster, the months are flying by, and I haven't gone anywhere or done anything with myself worthwhile. It's not all just being depressed, it's a kind of anxiety. I just need to do something so I can stop holding my breath, if nothing else.
Anyway. Bitch bitch bitch.
The nice news is that I'm cat sitting for Ginger and having a cat around the appartment is so nice. I missed it a lot, a fuzzy little friend to sit and sleep on you and walk all over your keybaord when you're trying to write. It's also nice to come home and never really feel alone even when the roomates are out. I can't afford it right now but I need to have a kitty again, they really do brighten up the home life so much,...when they're not being a little pain in the ass.
Off to go be all productive like on the internet now. No my LJ and Myspace for Mir. Focus, Mir, Focus.