Perfect
Pairings Khunho
Rating Pg-13
Summary - Nichkhun was raised in the perfect world; his mother always made sure of it. But Nichkhun never really understood the meaning of the word until he met Junho.
Perfect.
Everything about this place was perfect. From the tall crisp white walls, the high ceilings decorated with intriguing candelabras, to the tables cover with white linen and place strategically threw out the room; Not too far apart from one another, yet far enough for its occupants to enjoy a private conversation. All of them surrounding a round dance floor currently fill with ladies and gents swirling gracefully around the floor. Even the food that was served was so perfect it was almost a crime to eat it; or so I hear one of the “perfect” guess say.
“Oh! Nichkhun sweaty. Come say hi please” My mother called out to me, tangling her arms with mines and guiding me in the direction of a very pompous woman.
“This is lady Wattana and her lovely daughter Mali” I untangled my arm from my mothers, taking the pompous lady’s hand on mine and kissing it ever so softly.
“Is a pleasure to meet you Lady Wattana. My mother has said many nice things about you”
“Oh My” the lady was fluster, her blush was visible even threw the thick layer of makeup she wore. She gave my mother a meaningful look and I saw the proud smirk on my mother’s face. Like the well train puppet that I was, I turned my attention to the young lady standing shyly beside her mother.
“Mali. Your name means Jasmine does it not?” I grabbed her hand just like I had her mother’s but I didn’t kiss it this time, simply brushing my fingers against her, feeling the soft and delicate skin on my fingertips.
“It does” her cheeks were tainted a beautiful shade of red, her dark eyes glistening with anticipation as I continue to hold her hand on mines.
“Suits you well. You are as beautiful and delicate as the flower itself” I finally lower my face, brushing my lips gently on her hand, glancing at her threw half lidded eyes.
“Care to spare this lonely prince a dance?” she smile, and as expected the smile was dazzling. As usual my mother had out did herself; just like everything else in the ostentatious gathering the girl was perfect.
Getting away turn out to be a mission; but in my 24 years living as a prince there was one valuable lesson I came to learn: how to get away.
It was mid-summer and humidity was at its best, all the extra clothing I was wearing suddenly felt uncomfortable and unnecessary. My feet dragged me through the hidden in door garden my mother show only to especial guess; like everything else in her life the garden was nothing but perfection. Only the most exquisite and exotic flowers grew in this place; she had then imported from different places in the world, even finding a way to alter the temperature in the place to ensure her flowers grew majestically. She micro managed every aspect of the garden, from the soil that was used to the water that was pour.
In a way I was just like the garden. Since birth I was polish and trimmed until I became nothing but another one of my mother’s perfect creations. All my life was spent studying, leaning, and improving. I had everything I could ask for, and from now on it seem like I would have a pretty bride as well. The celebration was in honor of my 24 birthday; and mother had made it clear it was time I form a perfect little family of my own. After all I was meant to take over the family’s business at some point; I need it to grow my own roots. Or so she said.
Perfect Nichkhun. Perfect life. Perfect. Perfect. Perfect. It was suffocating; I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t live…
“Something on your mind?” I hadn’t notice the boy seating alone in a corner of the garden. He was seating on the floor, legs spread wide and using his hands to support his body.
“Excuse me?”
“You seem to be lost in thought; you shouldn’t frown so much when you are in such a beautiful place”
He threw his head back, closing his eyes and inhaling the night’s air. There was something strange about this boy, and it wasn’t the casual stone he used to address me. I had never seen him before around the mission, yet I was sure there was a lot of the help I wouldn’t recognize.
“Beautiful” I repeated the word, a tone of mockery in my voice.
“How can something fake be beautiful?”
“Fake?!” he seem offended, turning his attention away from me and to an Orange Amaryllis flower that was beside him. His fingers traced the delicate petal, leaning close and inhaling the scent of the flower.
“Hard as they try there is no way something as beautiful as this could be created by filthy human hands”
“My mother has this brought from different places, alters everything so that the flowers would grow perfectly” his fingers left the flower, getting up and moving up to a different section of the garden. Unconsciously I follow, feeling intrigue by the un-name stranger. He stopped in front of a bed of Crane flowers. To any one glancing from a distance it would seem like a flock of exotic birds had gather in this one particular spot. Squatting before the flowers, he once again traced his fingers over the petal, making sure not to damage the plant.
“Your mother didn’t make these flowers, when something it’s meant to grow beautifully it would with or without help. Your mother simply makes the process a bit easier. Kind of like you prince Nichkhun”
For the first time he look at me; his eyes were beautiful hidden behind an eye smile that made it almost impossible to see them properly.
“Do I know you?” I was sure I had never seen him before. There was no way in this planet I would had ever forgotten those delicate yet beautiful features.
“You don’t know me, but I know you Nichkhun”
“If you know me you are very bold addressing me informally”
“If that is your wish I would address you formally, but I was under the impression you prefer it this way”
He stood up, forgetting about the flowers and taking slow yet sure steps closer to me. I wasn’t use to the boldness; servants would normally stir clear out of my path, with the exception of my teachers no one would talk to me unless they were spoken to first. Yet this kid was now standing only a few inches in front of me, his fingers now brushing my cheek in the same delicate manner he had been touching the flowers not long ago. His touch was cold, a contradiction to the warm and obnoxious heat that surrounded us. My eyes flutter close, enjoying the feel of the cool finger tips as they travel from my check to my jaw line, tracing every inch of my face as if committing it to memory. I didn’t care that I had just met this person; I just wanted those fingers to continue on touching me for as long as humanly possible.
“I’ve always wanted to do that” he said, swiping his fingers over my lips before removing his hand completely.
“JUNHO!” a voice call out, startling me. Junho remain calm, a deep sight escaping his lips, his eyes now on the ground.
“I’ve been found” he mumbled under his breath. I recognize the new addition to our gathering. MinJun was my music instructor, a very loud and cheerful man and one of the few people I was able to be myself with. Yet the cheerfulness was gone from his face as his arms wrapped around the boy.
“Junho don’t do that to me again ok? You scare me to death you rascal!”
“Sorry hyung…” MinJun finally notice me, bowing his head in an apologetic manner.
“Sorry Nichkhun. My little brother tents to forget his place at times” he threw an arm over Junho’s shoulders guiding him away from me and back into the house. As the boy, whose name I now knew was Junho, was taken from my side it was as if suddenly the air was taken from the room as well. My earlier feelings of been suffocated returning with his absence.
My life continued on as if nothing out of the ordinary had happen. As if I hadn’t been completely shaken to the core by a young boy with a beautiful eye smile. I found myself looking forward to music classes, wanting to get as much information about Junho from MinJun as possible. Yet he barely gave anything away, simply saying that Junho was allow to stay with him in the house in especial circumstances. Aside from teaching me the wonders of music MinJun also work closely with my mother, he was one of the few people trusted enough to allow to live in the premises.
I made it a routine to visit the indoor garden every night before going off to bed. At times I would get lucky and I would find Junho talking to the flowers, whispering words too low for me to hear. I would stand there watching him, until he would finally turn his attention to me. Junho became my scape, when I was with him I was able to breathe properly, my problems forgotten. There was no need for me to be proper or perfect; I didn’t have to laugh if his jokes were lame, didn’t have to watch my words and refrain from using profanity if I was upset, I could scream…I could cry…I could be mad and obnoxious and everything I wanted and Junho would just respond with one of his dazzling eye smiles.
Eventually MinJun stop coming to fetch Junho when we had our little night meetings; days turn into nights, nights into weeks and weeks into months. During the day I was force to be proper Nichkhun, during the nights I could run away to the comfort that was Junho.
“Mother would be announcing the engagement at the next ball” Junho didn’t look at me. We were sitting on the floor, as usual Junho ignore benches and proper seats; he enjoy been close to the flowers.
“How do you feel about her?”
Mali was a beautiful girl, smart, funny, any man would be happy to have her as his wife, any man would easily fall in love with her; but how could I put my heart into something when I was clearly somewhere else. I had try to voiced out my feelings for Junho before, but the words would forever get stuck in my throat, the fear to tarnish then one true relationship I had ever built in my life too great for me to give in to my desires.
“I don’t know” I answer truthfully. Junho stood up, cleaning the dirt of his pants and smiling weekly at me as I follow his lead. There was something different about him today, his skin seem paler than normal, his lips dried. Even the glimmer on his eyes seemed a bit opaque, a hint of yellow tainting the white of his eyes.
“Junho are you sick? You don’t look so well…” he ignored my question. I knew something was off with him, had known it for a while yet I never got a direct answer from either him or MinJun. They would both disappear at times, and I would spent a few days without seen them both. Once I watched them return to the house, Junho trying his best to hide the wrist band on his wrist as he greeted me politely; others were around and still to this day out friendship was a secret to everyone but MinJun. He tried to block my view but not before I noticed the hospital wristband on his wrist.
He moved along the garden, knowing that I would follow. We pass all the beautiful bed of roses and nameless flowers, not a word been spoken as he let me to a back door and threw a barely lit path in the courtyard. Finally we reach a secluded area of the yard; a small shallow pond hidden behind some bushes was his final destination.
“Have I ever tell you what is my favorite flower Khun?” he ask, reaching over the murky water and tracing over a flower bud that stood tall over the water.
“Lotus flowers grown from the mud, they raise from the bottom of the pond threw the murky waters and stand proud and tall waiting for the morning sun to open their petals. Then once the sun is set, the petals wither and the flower loses its beauty. Their life is short yet they make the best of it, gracing the world with their beauty, zero regrets as they wither way given path for a brand new flower to take their place.”
He moved closer to me now, his hands circling my waist, his forehead pressed against my chest.
“I always watched you from the sidelines, always wanted to meet you and get to talk to you at least once…this was more than I could ever ask for. Thank you. Now like the Lotus I won’t have any regrets when my petals wither as well”
I pushed him away from me, my fingers tracing the outline of his jaw and forcing him to look at me.
“I know how we can make it even more memorable”
Perfect. I found myself using the word once more but this time I had finally found the real meaning behind it. Junho was perfect, his lean naked body lay motionless on my bed, his breath was coming short, chest heaving, eyes fill with lust as he watched me removed my own clothing, gasping when I crawl on the bed over him. I began on his wrist, my fingertips brushing the delicate skin with the same tenderness he had shown the flower; I work my way up his arm and over his shoulder, pausing when I reach the protruding collarbone. I move up, tracing his lips with my finger before parting his lip and inserting the finger into his mouth, coting it with his saliva then using the same finger to trace the outer rim of his nipple. He whimper, his face twisting with pleasure, hands reaching out eager to touch. Hips push upwards, brushing our erections together; the friction earning a silent moan that was quickly silent by a passionate kiss.
Everything about him was simple perfection…the way his back arch in pleasure as I took one of his nipples into my mouth. His head thrown back…eyes close…lips parted…my name decorating his beautiful lips as I made my way lower…sweeping my tongue over his lean stomach, pressing wet kisses on his inner thigh…It was a game of give and take, each trying to give as much pleasure as the other was receiving, and when he finally pushed me down, lowering himself onto my throbbing cock I was sure nothing else in this planet would feel as good as his perfect ass taking me all in.
His arms wrapped around my neck, his face buried at the nape of my neck, the sound of his voice driving me insane. “Please…Khun…” my fingers wrapped around his hips, raising his body a few inches away from mind as I slowly let myself control go, Junho whimper at the first thrust, but that was quickly follow by a train of unrecognizable sounds of bliss as the speed of my thrust increase, finding the perfect angle that had him screaming my name, begging me for more; a request I was more than happy to fulfill. Explaining what I felt at the moment would be impossible; no words would do justice to the current state I was in. Junho was a drug; and I was shamelessly intoxicated.
It was a while before he finally collapsed over me, body drench in sweat and out of breath, both of us too tired to move. I search blindly for the sheets, using them to cover our bodies and turning a now sleeping Junho on his side. I pulled his body closer to mind, the sound of his steady breathing aiding me to sleep.
“MinJun I need to see him” He ignored me. Placing the music sheet in front of the piano and motioning me to take a seat.
“This is the song your mother wants you to learn, so please pay attention” he began pressing the ceramic keys from the piano, humming along to the beautiful melody his fingers were creating. The whole thing made me sick and before I knew it I slammed my hand into the keys, knocking the music sheet from its place.
“It’s been two weeks MinJun; he had never stay away this long so you better tell me where he is or I will-“
“You will what?!” he stood up, anger on his voice. His fingers wrapped around the collar of my shirt, bringing my face closer to his.
“Let me tell you what you are going to do Nichkhun. You are going to forget about my brother and you are going to waltz into that little gathering of your family tomorrow, a smile on your pretty face and you are going to play the damn song for your future wife.”
“You can’t keep him away MinJun…” obviously that had been the wrong thing to say. My body was suddenly shoved backwards, MinJun’s fist clenching tightly on his sides.
“You selfish bastard, you want him to stick around for what? So he can see you married off to that girl? I knew I should have stopped this before it got too far…I should have protected my baby brother…he’s sick Khun. Those were the especial circumstances as to why he was allow to remain by my side. Junho was born with a weak heart…and now because of you he’s gone. And there’s nothing I could…”
“How come I don’t hear any music playing?” the soft voice of my mother broke the heavy silence that felt after MinJun’s confession. My mother looking between us both, noticing the sheet of music still in the floor.
“Nichkhun dear what’s going on?” I ignore her, my eyes still fixated on MinJun.
“Where is him?”
“Are you asking about your little pet honey?” my mother was the one to answer this time, the sudden feeling of dread causing my stomach to turn.
“What did you do?” MinJun look at the ground, my mother walking around me and brushing her fingers gently on the piano keys.
“I saw him coming out of your room that night, I figure things between you guys went a little too far so I simply reminded him of his place”
“You knew”
“Of course I did, Khunie baby. I know everything about my angel” her fingers brushed my arm and I swapped them away. She looked at me a bit startle, not use to the rejection.
“Mother, where is Junho?”
“What makes you think I would tell you Nichkhun? I would not permit you to-“
“You would do nothing mother. I’m 24 years old and I would do as I please, I’m sick and tired of you and your controlling ways. I had enough, so either you tell me where he is or I swear I would move heaven and earth to find him”
“You would get over this Nichkhun, you would married Mali and tha-“ My hand smack the top of the piano causing her to jump in surprise. Ignoring her I turned to MinJun.
“Where did he go? And don’t tell me you don’t know” he seem torn, his eyes going back and forth between my mother and me, then suddenly I understood. I turn away from both of them, my mother calling out to me as I left the room. It was obvious she had somehow found a way to ensure Minjun wouldn’t tell me Junho’s wear about.
I move alone the corridors of the huge house, wondering why in the world would a small family need such a big house. This part of the house was one I barely visited yet today seem like a good day as ever to brake that habit. I knock on the tall wooden door
“Come in” a husky voice call from the inside of the room and I brace myself before stepping in. my father sat behind his huge mahogany desk, face buried in a book tick enough to cause serious damage if use as a weapon. Unlike mother my father had always been a simple man, and this office was the one place where he was able to escape my mother’s extravagant suggestions. The only thing fancy about this room was a fireplace place in a corner of the room, right above it a picture of my family hanging proud. Father, mother, my two younger sisters, myself and my older brother Nichan. He was the first one to escape mother’s claws, defying her and running off to married some girl. Of course the marriage was a failure and I always call him an idiot for defying mother and not getting anything about it, he would always shrug and simply smile. Now I understood, he did gain something and I was the real fool. What Nichan had earned was his freedom, and now I was searching for the same.
“Father…I…” the words got caught in my throat. How did I tell a man I barely spoke to, the man that had given me life that I would be leaving, that I couldn’t stay to live in this beautifully decorated hell. That the minute Junho had walk out those doors he had taken all my air with him, and now I was slowly suffocating not able to take living my life as my mother’s puppet a second more.
“Took you long enough” he said, making me feel a bit confused. Placing the book down he open one of the desk drawers, producing a white envelope and handing it to me.
“There’s cash and I put some money aside for you with the bank, the account number would be there as well. It should be enough to get you by until you find something to do, then you are on your own. Talk to Nichan and he’ll help you find a place to stay”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing, my hand gripping the envelope tightly as I walk around the desk, dropping to my knees before my father and placing my head on his knees.
“Thank you dad” he ruffle my hair gently, like he had done so many times when I was just a little boy.
“It’s about time you find your own path Khun, go find that boy. I would take care of your mother” I force myself to get up, giving my dad one last hug before leaving his office. The thought that it may be a while before I saw his face again making my heart ache.
“You are leaving” MinJun walked into my room, his eyes fixated on the open suitcase currently lying on my bed. I had gotten a hold of Nichan and he agreed to let me stay at his place until I figure something out. My mother had thrown a fit and faked a nervous breakdown; I would have probably been concern if not for the fact that I knew my mother very well to know when her intentions were simply to manipulate.
“Tonight. My brother agreed to let me stay at his place for the mean time.”
“But what about your life…You’ll be leaving it all behind…”
“And I would do it a thousand times if it means I get to be with Junho Minjun” I knew asking wouldn’t be of any help, he had been clear when he said he wouldn’t tell me where Junho was, but now he was hesitating, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt, eyes staring at the ground.
“MinJun…please…” he let out a heavy sight, his eyes raising from the floor and meeting mines.
“I guess I have nothing to lose given I probably won’t have a job after tonight anyhow…”
I felt bad knowing that my actions had cost him his job but I couldn’t help smile, the warm flicker of hope becoming stronger every second. He walked over to my desk, grabbing a posted note and scribbling something on it.
“Here, you can find him there”
Since I was a kid I learned to appreciate every second of my life, nothing could put me down, nothing could make me sad, nothing could be worse than the situation I was already in; knowing that you could die of heart failure at any second did that to you. But now, as I sat alone on the old apartment me and Minjun use to share, I realize I had been wrong.
I thought walking away was the answer, Nichkhun’s mom had been right. What could I be to Nichkhun but a burden? He was better off without me. Yet not even knowing that my life was meant to be shorter than most hurt as much as walking away did. I knew it was the right thing to do…but why did I felt like running back to him and never letting go?
A light knock on the door brought me back from my misery, I was so lost in self-pity I didn’t even bother checking the peep hole; and when Nichkhun was the one standing by the door I knew I had to be dreaming. It seem all the medication I was force to take had finally take its toll.
“Junho…” even his voice sounded sweeter, gentler, a figment of my imagination? Or was it real…
I stretch out my hand, letting out a silent sight as my fingers brushed his cheek.
“You shouldn’t be here” his hands were place on my waist, forcing me to step backwards as he pushed us both back into the apartment , using his foot to kick the door closer behind him.
“Why not?” he asks, continuing on guiding me backwards until the back of my knees hit the couch.
“Because this is not right. I’m not good for you Khun…”
“Why Junho? Because you are sick?” my eyes open wide in shock and he chuckle. His hand leaving my wait and brushing against my face.
“MinJun told me everything. I know about the condition of your heart. I know the odds of you finding a donor, and the chances of the operation been a failure. I also know what my mother told you and I want you to know she was wrong Junho. You would never be a burden to me…I love you and I want to remain by your side until the end.”
His finger caught a wondering tear that had begun to make its way down my cheek then he move his hand, placing his palm over my chest, right over where my heart should be. I wonder if he could feel how fast it was beating…and not because of the condition that ail me but simply because of the closeness between us.
His free hand was still on my waist and he used it to pull me closer; his lips brushing mines as he spoke.
“Let me stay with you Junho…I live in prison my entire life and I finally found my way out. Please…”
When the teasing finally stop and his lips parted mines I forgot all the reasons as to why I had walked away in the first place. When his hands dove under my shirt, breaking our kiss long enough to remove the article of clothing I felt like my skin would burst on fire from the touch. He pushed me back into the couch, earning no resistance from me at all. kissing my neck, my arms, my chest…going lower and licking my lower stomach, taking his time to removed my bottoms at a snail like pace.
Sounds I had never hear myself make before force the way out of my mouth, my fingers entangling on his hair as the marvelous tongue follow that happy trail; my pants and underwear somehow already removed. When his tongue lick the underside of my erection I found myself pleading for more, and when he took me all in I swear something exploded inside of me. It wasn’t the first time we were intimate but something about this time was different.
He wasn’t gentle and I was grateful for it. When his fingers coated with the precome leaking from my cock enter me my whole body arched…and when his fingers were replace with something much bigger I found myself crying. Not because of discomfort or pain but because I somehow knew that from now on he was completely mines and I was his. That he would remain by my side until the end, and just like the lotus flower I will enjoyed my life to the fullest and when the twilight of my short life finally arrive and my petals finally wither there would not be any regrets.
He slowed down his movement, catching the rogue tear with his kiss, whispering a soft I love you into my ear.
“I love you too…my perfect prince”