My love/hate relationship with food
I am so frustrated...
So since moving to Oregon 2 1/2 years ago, I've lost over 40 pounds. I'm the thinnest I've been since the 6th grade. And it feels great, aside from the fact that I a shit ton of clothes that are now giant on me... The first 20 pounds I lost slowly over the first year and a half, with the majority of it coming off after I quit smoking and started running. The last 20 pounds I've lost in the last 6-8 months without much effort. Stress and life changes just kind of took it's toll on me with positive results.
So, regardless of how much smaller my body is now, my abs are still a mess. I've never had strong abdominal muscles and after an abdominal hernia surgery in college I really just stopped trying. It hurt. And now, in just a little over the month I'm heading to Jamaica with some girlfriends for Spring Break. And because I've lost so much weight, I've suddenly decided that maybe I can wear a bikini in jamaica... It would be the first time I've worn a bikini since I was like 7.
But, I don't think I'll reach my goal. First of all, i can't freaking keep myself away from cookies and ice cream... and burgers... and fries... I have these huge food cravings and then I'm riddled with guilt even thinking about eating! And I've been doing 50 minutes of pilates every day since Saturday. But I'm just not seeing any results. I know I'm not going to be a supermodel after 4 days of Pilates, but is it doing anything?! Should I be wasting my time even trying?! It's so frustrating to keep doing it and not seeing any results. Everyday I stare at myself in the mirror looking for even the tiniest improvement...
ARGGGGGGGGGG.
Anyone know of any good ab workouts?? Or cute tankinis?? I mean, I'm going to jamaica with some of the most beautiful women I know... I need to at least TRY to keep up...
So since moving to Oregon 2 1/2 years ago, I've lost over 40 pounds. I'm the thinnest I've been since the 6th grade. And it feels great, aside from the fact that I a shit ton of clothes that are now giant on me... The first 20 pounds I lost slowly over the first year and a half, with the majority of it coming off after I quit smoking and started running. The last 20 pounds I've lost in the last 6-8 months without much effort. Stress and life changes just kind of took it's toll on me with positive results.
So, regardless of how much smaller my body is now, my abs are still a mess. I've never had strong abdominal muscles and after an abdominal hernia surgery in college I really just stopped trying. It hurt. And now, in just a little over the month I'm heading to Jamaica with some girlfriends for Spring Break. And because I've lost so much weight, I've suddenly decided that maybe I can wear a bikini in jamaica... It would be the first time I've worn a bikini since I was like 7.
But, I don't think I'll reach my goal. First of all, i can't freaking keep myself away from cookies and ice cream... and burgers... and fries... I have these huge food cravings and then I'm riddled with guilt even thinking about eating! And I've been doing 50 minutes of pilates every day since Saturday. But I'm just not seeing any results. I know I'm not going to be a supermodel after 4 days of Pilates, but is it doing anything?! Should I be wasting my time even trying?! It's so frustrating to keep doing it and not seeing any results. Everyday I stare at myself in the mirror looking for even the tiniest improvement...
ARGGGGGGGGGG.
Anyone know of any good ab workouts?? Or cute tankinis?? I mean, I'm going to jamaica with some of the most beautiful women I know... I need to at least TRY to keep up...