Fic: A Match Made in Heaven, Chapter Three
Title: A Match Made in Heaven
Rating: Still G, some boy-kissing.
Characters: Dick Grayson/Robin, Roy Harper/Speedy, Victor Fries/Mr. Freeze, Donna Troy/Wonder Girl, Wally West/Kid Flash, Aqualad/Garth, Bruce Wayne/Batman
Disclaimer: See Prologue.
Synopsis: See Prologue.
Three o’clock the next afternoon at the largest mall in Star City…
Dick Grayson strode confidently into the bustling shopping center, smiling almost wickedly at the thought of the day’s plans. This might actually turn out to be fun!
“Well, Roy, ready to… Roy?”
The smile vanished under a concerned expression as Dick looked around for his missing buddy. After a few moments of glancing around, the dark-haired teen spotted Roy trying to sneak out the mall doors.
Dick shot a murderous glare in Roy’s direction. Even though Roy was facing the opposite direction, Roy saw the reflection of Dick’s evil glare in the glass doors and slunk back to his reluctant position beside the Bat’s sidekick.
“You are this close to losing the bike, buster,” Dick growled through gritted teeth.
“Yeah, well, you never mentioned that part of the plan was spending all my money in one lousy afternoon. And on you, of all people!!”
“Not my fault, Harper. You wanted to be the guy in the relationship, and now you are. Which means you pay for everything.”
“You sure you’re not just cheap?”
“Quit whining.”
“But did you see the tab on last night’s dinner date?! That Asahi place really did a number on my wallet, and now you expect me to wander around a stupid mall all afternoon buying whatever you want?! That’s insane!”
“I promised to reimburse you for the dinner, didn’t I?”
“That’s not the point! If we’re both rich, why can’t you just buy stuff for yourself?”
Dick looked at him incredulously.
“Because that’s not romantic? Duh? Now let’s move-I have to be home by six, and I need a new coat! Come on!”
Grabbing Roy’s arm, Dick gave him a firm pull, which started them both on what would turn out to be a long afternoon.
The first store they visited, per Dick’s request (a.k.a. command), was a store that sold leather goods. Very expensive leather goods. And of course the first thing Dick went for was a white designer jacket with a light brown faux fur collar-something he never would have done if Bruce had been the one footing the bill. But, considering what he’d been putting up with from Roy for the past few days, Dick figured he deserved a little something for himself.
Roy did not seem to agree.
He stared at Dick’s choice, trying to hide the horror he felt.
“Can’t you just get by with a scarf and a pair of gloves?”
Roy bought the jacket.
“But you’re carrying the bag!”
“Ever the romantic, aren’t we, Casanova?”
The red-head turned to retort but lost his voice when Dick slipped his free hand into Roy’s and forced a smile. He really didn’t want to be doing this… but he was a crime-fighter. He had to do what he had to do, and that meant making the world think he was attracted to this idiot.
Besides, Bruce had threatened to ground him if he didn’t.
Two hours and about five hundred dollars out of Roy’s wallet later, they continued to walk along, browsing the various stores surrounding them.
Roy asked quietly, “You’ve been awful picky about what’s romantic and what’s not. Since when do you know so much about romance, Bird Boy? You’ve never even been on a real date before…”
“Bruce told me what to do. And what makes you think I’ve never been on a date before?”
“Come on. It’s obvious. You always hang out by yourself, and Wayne keeps you so busy that you don’t have time to go out and get a girlfriend… or boyfriend… hey, what are you, anyway?”
“And that is your business how?”
“Everything about you is my business. I’m your boyfriend, remember?”
Dick laughed a little.
“Yeah, I remember. Just make sure you do.”
“HEY, HARPER!!”
The young ‘couple’ whirled around at the sound of the new voice. Dick stared in confusion, but Roy’s eyes widened in panic as a small group of teenagers approached.
“Aw, geez, not now…” Roy hissed.
“What? Who are they?” Dick asked.
“Some friends from school. But I don’t want them to see me with you. It’ll ruin my reputation!”
“Excuse me? I would ruin your reputation?!” Dick shot back, looking extremely offended. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Roy fumbled, “Um, ah, nothing. I-I didn’t mean ruin, exactly, but…”
“Just get rid of them. Fast.”
As the trio approached, Roy greeted the lanky brunette who had started the conversation.
“Hey, Randall. What’s up?”
“Nothing much,” Randall replied. “Me and the guys decided to put off our homework for a while by seeing what’s new at the video arcade. Want to join us?”
This time, warning Roy by locking his hand in a death grip was unnecessary. The red-head already knew what to do.
“Uh, no thanks. I’m kinda busy right now, you know?” he said immediately, jerking his head subtly in Dick’s direction. This simple action caused the other kids to turn to stare at the Gotham teen as Roy began the introductions, “Um, Dick, this is Alex Randall and Kim Brooks and Jeff Dillan. They’re friends of mine from school. And guys, this is Dick Grayson. He’s a, uh… friend of mine.”
Smooth, Harper, real smooth, Dick thought in slight disgust. You’re supposed to want to be with me!
But ‘the guys’ were apparently big fans of the tabloids.
“You mean boyfriend!” Jeff immediately put in.
“You mean it’s true?” Alex queried, eyes wide. “I thought the newspaper just made all that up. You two are really…?”
“Oh yeah.”
Well at least that bonehead didn’t hesitate to answer…
“Well that’s… good,” Alex said, as if struggling for the correct adjective. “Congrats.”
“Thank you,” Dick and Roy chorused.
“Oh, darn,” Kim put in, pouting playfully. “Well, you know what they say about all the good ones…”
She was staring directly at Dick as she spoke.
Dick blushed deeply but stood his ground and smiled back at her. He gave Roy’s hand a little squeeze, as if saying ‘let’s go NOW’.
Roy was about to obey when…
“I still don’t believe it!” Alex laughed. “What about all those girls you’ve dated at school, Harper?”
“That’s all over now,” Dick jumped in quickly before Roy could come up with his own sure-to-be-stupid explanation.
“Yeah, well, I won’t believe it until I actually see you two kiss.”
“Who cares what you believe?” countered Dick, finally letting his irritation shine through. “We know what our relationship is, and that’s all that matters.”
Which was Dick’s way of telling Roy to quit worrying about his reputation. And of telling Alex to buzz off.
Roy got the message.
Alex didn’t.
“Oh, yeah? Well, I dare you to kiss Harper-on the lips-right now.”
“C’mon, Alex, leave them alone,” Kim said uncertainly, tugging on his arm a little. “Dick is right. This is their business.”
“No way! I wanna see this…”
“I second!” Jeff laughed.
By this point, Roy’s face had turned about as white as it possibly could. Dick’s was as red as a tomato.
Eyes wide from shock, Roy whispered out the side of his mouth, “Um… what’s the plan now, Wonder Boy?”
“…Actually… I was kinda hoping you had a plan…”
“…Not exactly what I wanted to hear…”
Meanwhile, Alex was completely oblivious to his very-soon-to-be-ex-school friend’s plight and goaded a little more, “Well, go on, you two! Whatcha waiting for? I mean I know you-Roy Harper-the Casanova of Star City-cannot possibly be shy about kissing your boyfriend in public. Unless, of course, he’s not really your boyfriend…”
“Of course he is!”
I can’t believe I just said that…
“So let’s see some lip action, dudes! Come on!” cried Jeff.
Roy and Dick turned to face each other.
“No way am I doing this, Roy,” Dick muttered. The natural background noises that filled the mall effectively kept everyone but Roy from hearing his words. “No way am I wasting my first kiss on a dork like you.”
At this, Roy positively smirked.
“So you haven’t been on a real date before.”
Dick scowled slightly but didn’t answer.
And suddenly, Roy saw the light. The perfect way to get back at Wonder Boy for the past week-even if it meant cutting his nose off to spite his face. As it were.
Grabbing his shocked ‘boyfriend’ by the shoulders, Roy pulled Dick in and-
“Oh, wow!” Alex, Jeff and Kim chorused in awe.
Then Alex pulled out his cell phone and hit the ‘record’ button.
--
By that night, a new video entitled ‘Look What I Found At The Mall!’ had been added to youtube.
--
Besides the obvious, there were two people who were VERY ticked off upon seeing the video.
The first was Bruce Wayne. Who spent the rest of that day and most of the next reminding Dick that he was absolutely, positively, one hundred percent BANNED from dating until he was at LEAST seventy-two.
“But this whole charade was your idea!” Dick protested.
“It was not my idea for Roy to go tongue-spelunking in your mouth.”
“Oh, so you mean it was my idea? And what kind of a stupid expression is that?!”
“You’re one to talk.”
The second person to be mad was Donna Troy. Despite Wally’s best efforts, the young Amazon had finally found out about Dick and Roy’s romance, thanks to the now-infamous youtube video. And to be honest, she wasn’t exactly mad. At least not any more. Trashing her bedrooms on both Paradise Island and Titans’ Tower really helped in that department.
“Why didn’t he tell me he was seeing Dick?!” she wailed, crying into a tissue while Garth and Wally attempted to comfort her. “He should have told me-you should have told me!”
Wally flinched at the angry finger suddenly being pointed in his direction.
“It wasn’t any of my business!” the speedster protested, holding up his arms to protect his face just the way he’d been taught to do when in mortal danger.
Donna nodded remorsefully.
“You’re right. I’m sorry,” she apologized, sniffling, as Garth patted her shoulder. “I just… I just really like Roy, you know? And this is so unexpected… if there had been some kind of sign or hint… but there was nothing…”
The boys nodded their agreement.
“I’m okay, guys, thanks,” she said bravely. Donna sniffed one last time before wiping her tears away. “At least I will be in a little while. And at least I know Roy will be very happy with Dick,” she went on as optimistically as she could. “Dick is a wonderful person, the greatest. He and Roy will be very happy… together…”
And she immediately dissolved into tears all over again.
Garth and Wally exchanged glances. It seemed as if they’d been drafted into an afternoon of shoulder-patting and tissue-offering when they heard a door opening elsewhere in the Tower.
“That must be Dick or Roy,” Garth figured.
“Oh, no, I don’t want to see them! Not yet!” Donna whispered in panic.
“Well, maybe they’ll go away,” suggested Wally.
They didn’t get to continue their conversation before Dick and Roy’s discussion reached their ears. From all the way down the hall:
“Speedy, what is the matter with you?! I thought we’d finally come to an understanding about this! You’re not allowed to date other people while you’re dating me!”
“News flash here, Wonder Boy-you don’t own me! And what gave you the right to get rid of Aya’s phone number?”
“What I want to know is how you got it back!”
“I don’t have to tell you anything!”
“Speedy!”
“What!”
“You’re supposed to be with me! You can’t just go gallivanting around with anybody you want!”
“Well if I knew what gallivanting meant, I’d answer that!”
“We’re supposed to go to the movies tonight! You promised! You can’t break our date tonight to go out with some flirty waitress!”
“You pushed me into that date with you!”
“I hardly think that letting you use my motorcycle for a week qualifies as ‘pushing’, Bowhead.”
“Hmmm… make it two weeks and I’ll take you to the movies.”
“One and a half!”
“Fine. But you have to pay for your own ticket.”
“Fine! But you better be there or so help me I’ll-”
“Don’t worry. I’ll be there.”
Then they heard Dick’s footsteps storming down the hall towards the front door of the Tower, undoubtedly headed for home. Roy remained in place a while longer before his footsteps joined Dick’s.
“Well that was… that was… actually, I don’t even know what that was…” Garth muttered.
“I know exactly what it was,” Wally replied, nodding sadly. “Sounds to me like Dick has been bribing Roy to go out with him. He must really have the hots for him.”
“I don’t think that’s-” Garth started. But he was promptly cut off by Donna.
“That’s horrible!” she yelled. Wally and Garth turned to stare at her in surprise. “Roy doesn’t have the right to walk all over Dick like that! We have to do something!”
“Uh… like what?”
“Donna, I really-” Garth began again, but he was once again interrupted.
“I don’t know! Either convince Dick to find somebody else or show Roy what a wonderful partner he has in Dick! Just… something!” cried Donna, sounding almost desperate. “We can’t let this go on!”
“Wait a minute,” said Wally. “So you wanna stick your nose into the personal life of Speedy the Boy Bonehead and Robin the wanna-be Vulcan… why does this not appeal to me?”
“Oh, come on. This is different,” Donna insisted. “You know that Dick would do the same for us if we were in trouble.”
“Guys, we overheard half of a conversation from clear across the hall,” Garth reminded them. “It’s quite probable that we are completely misinterpreting this whole-”
“Oh, okay, I guess you’re right,” Wally reluctantly consented to Donna’s plan. “We can meet at my place to talk about it, if you want. You coming, Gillhead?”
Garth just sighed.
That night, Donna and Wally met as planned. Garth had opted out and was still at the Tower, making a few phone calls…
--
“If you ask me, this whole mess is the fault of Roy’s guardian,” Donna decided immediately, munching on one of the cookies that they’d picked up on the way to Wally’s house. “Roy is simply emulating what he sees Mr. Queen doing-running around with everyone who catches his eye, disrespecting his partners, behaving like an arrogant… man…”
“Yeah, but Bruce Wayne does the same thing,” Wally argued.
“Not quite. Yes, he does run around with women, which I thoroughly disapprove of. However, he is doing it more to cover up his activities as a crime-fighter than because he enjoys it.”
“Coulda fooled me…”
“That’s exactly what he wants to do.”
“…Wait, so you’re saying you want me to go confront Oliver Queen, tell him to his face that he’s a dork-not that I don’t agree with you there-and expect him to do something about Roy’s behavior for once?!”
“No, I’ll handle Queen. You talk to Dick.”
“WHAT!! That’s even worse!”
“Wally, we have to find out why a strong, confident person like Dick is letting Roy push him around this way. It’s just not like him. Something could be wrong.”
Wally thought about it for a minute. As much as he hated to admit it, Donna was one hundred percent right. As tough as Dick was, he was obviously in over his head this time. And what were friends for if not to bail each other out when the occasion called for it?
The teenaged speedster nodded.
“Okay. I’ll do it.”
Just then, the phone rang. Since everyone else had already gone to bed, Wally got up to answer it.
“Hey there, West residence… Gillhead?”
Donna sprang up from the table and pressed her ear up against the phone, hoping to listen in on what Aqualad was saying.
Meanwhile, Wally continued, “Something wrong, Garth?”
“No, nothing’s wrong,” the Atlantean assured them. “I wanted to let you know that I’ve just spoken with Dick, and he says-”
“You spoke with Dick?! Great! You saved me the trouble! What’s ol’ Wonder Breath got to say about this?”
“Actually, it’s really quite interesting.”
“Well, hurry up! Tell us!” Wally cried. “What’s the scoop?”
“You’ll hate yourself forever.”
“Please don’t tell me you DID NOT discuss his relationship with Roy.”
“Of course I did. In fact, Dick tells me that he and Roy will be together at Gotham Central Park tomorrow morning, but only because-”
“Gotham Central Park. Got it. Did he say what time.”
“…About ten. But-”
“Terrific! Thanks, Fish Stick! You rock!”
Wally hung up the phone.
“That’s wonderful news!” Donna said happily, trying not to be too noisy so she wouldn’t wake anybody up.
“Yeah! Now we know exactly where Dick will be tomorrow morning so we don’t have to go wandering around wasting time!” Wally agreed. “If only we could get the same kind of information about Oliver Queen…”
The phone rang again. Wally picked it up immediately.
“West residence… Gillhead? What’re you calling back so soon for?… you talked to Roy too?… hey, before you say anything, you wouldn’t happen to know where Ollie will be tomorrow and when, would you?… YOU DO?!… that’s fantastic! Bye, Garth!”
Wally hung up the phone.
“Tomorrow morning, nine o’clock, the dining room at the Ritz Carlton in Star City.”
Donna and Wally exchanged high-fives.
--
Garth blinked at the phone in surprise and sighed heavily as he realized that Wally had just hung up on him. Again. He briefly considered calling a third time to tell Wally and Donna the truth behind Dick and Roy’s ‘relationship’ but figured he’d better not. They were both too caught up in their own fantasy to listen to reason.
As he left the Tower, Garth decided that he should warn Dick about what two of the Titans were planning. Unfortunately, he’d be busy with Aquaman until the end of the week. So he’d have to wait until Saturday. Maybe he’d find out exactly where Gotham Central Park was and pay the team leader a visit then.
--
Thanks to the promise of a few extra days with the R-Cycle, Roy kept his word and went to the movies with Dick that night. The movie was pretty good, but Dick was not in a very happy mood by the time it was over because Mr. Freeze had failed to show up and freeze one of them.
“And that would be a bad thing?” Roy asked, sounding bored.
“Yes! I want to be kidnapped NOW!”
“Oh, relax, Wonder Boy. I’m sure he’ll pop out and snatch ya eventually.”
“And get off youtube! I don’t know how you can even stand to watch that disgusting thing!” snapped Dick.
“I’m not watching it. That would be gross. I’m counting the number of hits. If my calculations are correct, we should have two million by Wednesday. But I’m no good at numbers. Want to check the equations for me?”
“After the fuss you put up this afternoon about going to the movies? No chance.”
“Would it help if I said was sorry?”
“No.”
“…Then would it help if I started acting like the absolutely most romantic guy on the planet?”
“I’ll believe that when I see it. Which I’d better this weekend at Gotham Central Park or else. And bring your ice skates.”
“Huh? The park?”
“Yes. Batman and I found out who one of Freeze’s men is and ‘let slip’ in his presence that you and I would be there on Saturday.”
“But it’s supposed to be below freezing!”
Dick glared.
“Right. The park. Great idea.”
--
And back at that SAME abandoned building in the outskirts of Gotham City…
Dempsey and four other men stood shivering silently in the large basement, waiting for Mr. Freeze to give them their orders. It had been nearly two weeks since their last kidnapping job, and all five of them were eager for some action.
Finally, Freeze turned to face his men.
“If Mr. Dempsey is correct, then our best chance of following through with our plans for Grayson and Harper is Saturday morning at Gotham Central Park at ten o’clock. I expect all of you to be there.”
“Which one are we snatchin’, boss?” one of the men asked eagerly.
Freeze looked at him for a moment before giving a simple, one-word answer:
“Both.”
“Both?” Dempsey repeated before he could stop himself. Luckily for him, Freeze did not reprimand him for doubting and elaborated, “Our plans are not moving as quickly as they should. We will need to start doubling the number of victims if we are to obtain the necessary funds on schedule… that is, if you think you can handle it?”
The men exchanged confident glances and nodded among themselves. If it meant they’d be earning a few extra bucks this week, they could handle just about anything.
-
Okay, so I still can't figure out how to match up the fonts. I somehow managed the first time, so who knows what's happening now. :P See? This is why I needed to post this fic. To practice my posting skillz.