Be Like the Butterfly
Change has become a major part of my life experience.
With it comes the fresh experiences of which I seek.
I crave and hunger for each instance which takes place in my life to be individualistic. To continue on in a world of security and structure would kill my meaning. I'm mean to create change and to gain power from it. However...I didn't create this. It was most definitely bound to happen eventually.
All of these happenings have been created by something else. Other people do have an affect on my world. Their doings create a consequence on my part. The reason this would be the fact that I will always have the chance to grasp the ability to change anything myself. Each of us can do as we please with this life. We have more power than we lead on. If this is true, however, how is it that those who take it upon themselves to grasp this concept are always swept away onto another wind from which they began? Once you take the responsability of your life, you will also have to take the responsability of other's lives.
In doing so, life is a crazy path of each person's own desires. Everone is trying to make the world their own and each clashing hope is only the product of a society of individualistic worlds/ideas. We are eachother's downfall. Their goals. Their will. You can never understand another person for there's a wall. Though invisible, this wall is infathomably indestructable. There is no way to truely understand the other person for their perspective will always be of a whole other nature than your's. We're different people. Why is it then that people believe in friendship, marriage, family, and communication? HOW DO WE DO THIS?!
Shit I tend to just go onto rampages when I write in this LJ now.
I used to write about my life, but now my life's too burdening.
I mean...when I come to this site to write about it my history escapes me. I see only the bare structure of what's going on. The philosophy behind all of my issues is so damned APPARENT! So I suppose that I would prefer to write about something that's more clear to me than what's actually happening to me at this moment. I'd rather write about something that is crystal in my mind than blurred with each story of another. All I know is what I hear and that isn't good enough for me. :/
Well I'll be staying in Tennessee for this week. Then...after that...I don't know what I'm doing. Hopefully things will work themselves out.
GODDAMMIT!!!!! I'm trying to burn an audio cd and i don't think that my pc wants for it to work for me. NUU! *crashes head into desk*
Soooo. The love of my life came down to visit me yesterday night and last night only to see ME before I am to go!! I feel so very loved and I love her more. =P <--- I'm very insistant on that fact. I SHALL WIN THE WHO LOVES WHO MORE GAME!!! Wait...isn't that a bad thing? OF COURSE NOT! ^^v ANYWHO! My love brought me doughnuts and snuggled with me on the couch twas fantastic. I am totally bragging and making all of you who don't have someone feel like crap. I know I know I'm just that happy that I don't really care. If I'm ever single again I'll probably be little miss stalker of this chick because she'd have to dump me for this little happy marriage of ours to end. :P I'm such a love-sick puppy. RUFF! RUFF! But I usually gooo... MAO MAO MAO MAO like a kitty cat! :) I like kitty cats. They're much more sophisticated than doggys. However, doggies are more rough and playful. Dunno which one I'd prefer. OH THE CONUNDRUM! I like sounding stupid when I'm writing about lovey dovey crap. :P
I LOVE YOU ANH!!!!!!!! MARRY ME!!!!!! :) *tackles*
Oh ya...she totally supplied me with the last two manga of GRAVITATION. So I'm all YAAAAY! She is feedin my gay boy addiction. =P THANKYOU, LOVE! :) Teehee. If only they had gay chicks in manga. Like...REAL yuri. Not the crap that I find everywhere. I'd be TOTALLY hooked on that shit. WEEEEEEEE! Alright so I'm all in love and happy and I'm showered with gifts from my love and that makes me want to dance. :)
I OFFICIALLY OWN THE COMPLETE SERIES OF GRAVI THANKS TO MY WONDERFUL GIRLFRIEND WHOM I'M GOING TO RAPE(but you can't rape the willing i suppose) OF HER LONLINESS WHEN I RETURN! HAVE FUN AT PRIDE, DARLING AND REMEMBER TO CALL ME EACH AND EVERY DAY OR ELSE I'LL CALL YOU EACH AND EVERY HOUR :) AAAAAAAAAAAACK. I play the creepy girlfriend part quite well, actually. *does a little dance*
Argh. Umm. Let us see if the SHITPIDSONOFABITCH burner is done burning my cd for my trip, shall we? :) OH BOY IT IS...but does it work? o_O NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *stabs self in the head*
*bleeds all over desk and shoes*
NO NOT THE SHOES! *slumps over and dies*
AAAAACK I'm DEAD!
Well while I'm in TN I'll be working on my manga...METALLIC BLOOD.
Hopefully I can actually FINISH it this time. :/
Alright. That's my mission. Hopefully I can actually accomplish this one.
luv,
spiffAI
With it comes the fresh experiences of which I seek.
I crave and hunger for each instance which takes place in my life to be individualistic. To continue on in a world of security and structure would kill my meaning. I'm mean to create change and to gain power from it. However...I didn't create this. It was most definitely bound to happen eventually.
All of these happenings have been created by something else. Other people do have an affect on my world. Their doings create a consequence on my part. The reason this would be the fact that I will always have the chance to grasp the ability to change anything myself. Each of us can do as we please with this life. We have more power than we lead on. If this is true, however, how is it that those who take it upon themselves to grasp this concept are always swept away onto another wind from which they began? Once you take the responsability of your life, you will also have to take the responsability of other's lives.
In doing so, life is a crazy path of each person's own desires. Everone is trying to make the world their own and each clashing hope is only the product of a society of individualistic worlds/ideas. We are eachother's downfall. Their goals. Their will. You can never understand another person for there's a wall. Though invisible, this wall is infathomably indestructable. There is no way to truely understand the other person for their perspective will always be of a whole other nature than your's. We're different people. Why is it then that people believe in friendship, marriage, family, and communication? HOW DO WE DO THIS?!
Shit I tend to just go onto rampages when I write in this LJ now.
I used to write about my life, but now my life's too burdening.
I mean...when I come to this site to write about it my history escapes me. I see only the bare structure of what's going on. The philosophy behind all of my issues is so damned APPARENT! So I suppose that I would prefer to write about something that's more clear to me than what's actually happening to me at this moment. I'd rather write about something that is crystal in my mind than blurred with each story of another. All I know is what I hear and that isn't good enough for me. :/
Well I'll be staying in Tennessee for this week. Then...after that...I don't know what I'm doing. Hopefully things will work themselves out.
GODDAMMIT!!!!! I'm trying to burn an audio cd and i don't think that my pc wants for it to work for me. NUU! *crashes head into desk*
Soooo. The love of my life came down to visit me yesterday night and last night only to see ME before I am to go!! I feel so very loved and I love her more. =P <--- I'm very insistant on that fact. I SHALL WIN THE WHO LOVES WHO MORE GAME!!! Wait...isn't that a bad thing? OF COURSE NOT! ^^v ANYWHO! My love brought me doughnuts and snuggled with me on the couch twas fantastic. I am totally bragging and making all of you who don't have someone feel like crap. I know I know I'm just that happy that I don't really care. If I'm ever single again I'll probably be little miss stalker of this chick because she'd have to dump me for this little happy marriage of ours to end. :P I'm such a love-sick puppy. RUFF! RUFF! But I usually gooo... MAO MAO MAO MAO like a kitty cat! :) I like kitty cats. They're much more sophisticated than doggys. However, doggies are more rough and playful. Dunno which one I'd prefer. OH THE CONUNDRUM! I like sounding stupid when I'm writing about lovey dovey crap. :P
I LOVE YOU ANH!!!!!!!! MARRY ME!!!!!! :) *tackles*
Oh ya...she totally supplied me with the last two manga of GRAVITATION. So I'm all YAAAAY! She is feedin my gay boy addiction. =P THANKYOU, LOVE! :) Teehee. If only they had gay chicks in manga. Like...REAL yuri. Not the crap that I find everywhere. I'd be TOTALLY hooked on that shit. WEEEEEEEE! Alright so I'm all in love and happy and I'm showered with gifts from my love and that makes me want to dance. :)
I OFFICIALLY OWN THE COMPLETE SERIES OF GRAVI THANKS TO MY WONDERFUL GIRLFRIEND WHOM I'M GOING TO RAPE(but you can't rape the willing i suppose) OF HER LONLINESS WHEN I RETURN! HAVE FUN AT PRIDE, DARLING AND REMEMBER TO CALL ME EACH AND EVERY DAY OR ELSE I'LL CALL YOU EACH AND EVERY HOUR :) AAAAAAAAAAAACK. I play the creepy girlfriend part quite well, actually. *does a little dance*
Argh. Umm. Let us see if the SHITPIDSONOFABITCH burner is done burning my cd for my trip, shall we? :) OH BOY IT IS...but does it work? o_O NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *stabs self in the head*
*bleeds all over desk and shoes*
NO NOT THE SHOES! *slumps over and dies*
AAAAACK I'm DEAD!
Well while I'm in TN I'll be working on my manga...METALLIC BLOOD.
Hopefully I can actually FINISH it this time. :/
Alright. That's my mission. Hopefully I can actually accomplish this one.
luv,
spiffAI