Soon ll Ryan/Summer
Title; Soon
Fandom; The O.C.
Pairing; Ryan Atwood/Summer Roberts
Rating; PG
Warnings; AU after S3.
Author's Note; Possibly the most depressing thing I have ever written! I like cute stuff!
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Soon
They hadn’t planned for this. Everything just happened so fast and so out of the blue. One minute she was here and the next she was gone. One minute she was sober and the next she was drunk, just like him. One minute they were talking, the next they were kissing.
It carried on like that, they would drink, and they would cry and miss her. The next moment, Summer would find herself stripped of all her clothes and lying in his arms. Pretty soon it was happening all the time and it was happening when they weren’t drunk. They planned to stop so often, said it was wrong. On Seth. And Marissa.
But one thing would always lead to another and they just couldn’t keep their hands of one another, nor did either of them want to. They would send each other looks from across the table, Summer stopped going to the Cohen’s house when she and Seth broke up but that didn’t stop her from meeting up with Ryan.
Pretty soon they were sneaking of anywhere they could to get the chance to have their hands on one another. Everything was fine. Until she saw that little pink line on the stick.
--
He freaks out. Of course. He can’t look her in the eye and she’s not sure what’s worse. The fact that she’s nineteen and pregnant or that he doesn’t want her or their child. She should have expected it, really, with everything that he went through with his own family.
“How can I raise a child? How can I be a good father?” He says. He doesn’t even yell, his voice is just…full of disbelief. She should have been more careful. She should have never let this happen in the first place. She was stupid, so stupid and yet, she doesn’t regret a thing. It’s scary but she doesn’t regret the little baby growing inside her either.
It grows bigger every day, Summer Roberts three years ago would have cried at the thought of getting fat, now she’s relishing in the idea. She’s just crying at the thought of being a single mom.
--
She knows he watches her from a distance. No one knows it’s his of course. Seth is shocked but he’s with Taylor now, so he can’t complain, really. Her dad is disappointed but even he can’t stop the smile that forms when she shows him a picture of her baby. Just three months and it already looks so big. She gets flowers every now and then, no note and no card but she knows they are from him.
He’s not ready, she reminds herself. It’s her mantra, always.
She never realised that she was in love with him until he was gone but she’ll always have a part of him, there’s always going to be that. She’s taking online classes and pretty soon she’ll be qualified to nurse. It wasn’t what she always aspired to be but it’s something. Her dads being supportive at least.
She’s swinging on the front porch, rubbing her stomach. She’s depressed now, none of her clothes fit her and Marissa isn’t there to bring her ice cream or anything that’s bad for her. No one’s there to take her baby shopping, her father’s always busy and she’s lost all her so called friends since they found out she was pregnant. Taylor’s nice; she brings her a pie every now and then with something newly knitted. She likes Taylor but it’s a little weird at the moment, with her and Seth and all.
She spends the day online shopping, she can’t bare the idea for people to see her, alone and a mess. But she can’t bring herself to buy all the pretty things either. It doesn’t seem right. She doesn’t know what she’s having yet. She wanted it to be a surprise but now she’s not so sure it was the right decision, everything is so colour co-ordinated these days.
--
She’s feeling particularly low today, six months gone already, it’s gone so fast she can hardly believe it. In three months she’ll be a mother. A single mother.
It turns up at the door unexpectedly. A cot, it’s huge and so spacious with stuffed toys hanging down for her baby to play with and she knows he made it himself. Knows he’s spent months planning the detail, scrapping every little piece that wasn’t perfect. Inside, there’s clothes of all kind, socks and vests and the cutest little shoes she’s ever seen.
She thinks she’s going to cry until she finds a scrap of paper too. Soon. I’ll be ready soon. And she’s in floods of tears, she doesn’t want to get her hopes up but she can’t help it, everything is so beautiful.
Her dad wants to know where it comes from but she doesn’t say a word, not until he’s ready. She knows one day he will be.
--
They weren’t lying when they said it was painful, it hurts so bad she wants to shatter every vase and photo frame in the room, she settles for near enough breaking her father’s hand, he’s there every step of the way. She collapses on the bed in a heap. She might be ready but her baby isn’t. Stubborn, just like her.
He appears at the doorway, petrified, she can see it in his eyes.
“I’m sorry.” He whispers. Her father’s watching him, curious. She’s a mess and for the first time she doesn’t care. She grins.
“It’s okay.” It’s not okay, she’ll probably yell at him later and punish him for the next few years but she’s hoping he’ll stick around to let her because she knows she’ll forgive him eventually. Because she loves him. Ryan walks closer, places a towel on her forehead to wipe the sweat away, she grimaces. He’s never seen her look so disgusting, he thinks she looks beautiful. She screams in pain. Their baby might be stubborn but it’s determined, just like him.
She pushes and pushes, attempting to break his hand instead, her father on one side, Ryan on the other. It couldn’t have been more perfect until it is. Until they meet their little girl.
She watches Ryan hold her in his arms; she watches the grin never leave his face. He can’t believe it, that something so tiny could be so beautiful and so perfect all in one. Looking at her, for the first time he believes, he’s truly ready to be her father and to be Summer’s everything.