Simple Remedy part 3/3
Part 3
”Jensen!”
Mike's excited voice rang through the store and Jensen almost turned on his heels. He had been in the store a few times after the first visit and he still felt a bit awkward as Mike excitedly bounded to him.
”Man, it's good to see you here,” Mike told him dragging him to the back of the store by his sleeve. ”Come and meet my boy Tom.”
Jensen laughed nervously as he let himself be led over to Tom. In the back there was a tall - not as tall as Jared, Jensen's mind suplied - guy stacking shelves.
”Jenny, meet Tommy,” Mike told him.
The guy let out a sigh rolling his eyes at Mike before turning to Jensen. ”Tom,” the guy held his hand out for Jensen to shake,
”Jensen.”
Mike clapped his hands together. ”Good, now that we all know each other we have to have a serious talk about Saturday the 28Th.”
”We do?” Tom asked raising a perfect eyebrow. Jensen watched the motion wondering briefly if he got them waxed.
”The party? On 28Th? In three weeks? Rings any bells?” Mike queried and turned to speak to Jensen. ”We're going to have this party and I really think you should come.”
”I might have something else...” Jensen started.
He didn't remember if he really had anything, but he didn't know Mike that well, either. It wasn't like him to get to know people this easily.
”You'll have to cancel. You're going to be at my party since it's going to be awesome.”
Jensen looked at Tom who just shrugged. ”Don't look at me. He clearly wants to adopt you as part of the gang so you might actually want to just agree, otherwise he's likely to kidnap you and bring you to the party anyway. Or move the whole party at your house like he did to the last guy he decided was going to be one of his best friends.”
”Don't think JT has still fully forgiven that....,” Mike said in a thoughtful undertone. Then he grinned widely. ”But he loves us so it's all good.”
”I'm sure he does,” Tom said dryly.
”So are you coming?” Mike asked Jensen.
”Maybe I could,” Jensen didn't really know what to say. ”Are you sure it's okay?”
”Why wouldn't it be?” Mike looked honestly puzzled.
”Well,” Jensen tried to smile mischievously. ”You barely know me. I could be a serial killer.”
”Nah,” Mike shrugged. ”Even Misha isn't one and he's even weirder than you are.”
Tom laughed patting Jensen on the shoulder. His palm was almost as wide as Jared's. ”Mike's a really good judge of character even if he's nuts.”
”Oh yes. So Jenny, what do you want this time?” Mike turned to ask Jensen.
Jensen's cheeks failed to keep from going pink. ”The thing I got the first time... do you have anything similar but, um, bigger?”
”I knew you'd love it!” Mike exclaimed.
He all but ran to the shelf holding the type of toys he had sold Jensen the first time and reached high on the top shelf. ”I've got just what you want.” He pulled down a box giving it to Jensen. ”Here you go.”
Jensen peered at the package. ”How much this it?”
”It's yours. Just remember to tell all your friends where the most awesome toys are sold,” Mike told him.
Jensen's eyes widened at that. ”You really think I'm going to tell someone?”
Tom laughed at that. ”Mike just can't seem to grasp the idea that even if they told him at business school that happy customers can be the best advertisement it doesn't really apply when you own a sex shop.”
On the Thursday afternoon Jensen went to Jared's office even if he had no appointment. After thinking long and hard, he had finally decided that maybe he should stop going there and he wanted to say that to Jared in person. And, maybe he hoped that they could still see each other even if Jensen stopped being Jared's patient.
There was no one in the waiting room but Jared's door was ajar. Jensen knocked lightly on the door frame before going in. Jared was filling out some paperwork and looked up at the noise.
”Jensen,” he said smiling slightly and pushing his bangs off his eyes. ”Hi.”
”Hey,” Jensen said feeling suddenly a little selfconcious and really had to concentrate in order to say something sensible.
After a moment of them just watching each other quietly Jared pushed his papers aside and got up. ”I was wondering if I'd see you,” he said in a slight tone that didn't really give Jensen any hints on what Jared was thinking.
”I still have an appointment next week,” Jensen pointed out stupidly.
”But that didn't really guarantee that you'd have shown up,” Jared said hesitantly.
Jensen looked at the floor at that comment. He knew that this had probably been on Jared's mind, since they hadn't spoken after what happened between them during Jensen's last appointment. Only minutes after they both had finished, Jared's next appointment was waiting outside his office giving them just enough time to clean up and have a few awkward kisses before Jensen had to leave. Jensen had just assumed Jared would know that Jensen would want to see him again . He reminded himself that Jared knew almost everything about him and his insecurities so it wouldn't be hard for him to be a bit skeptical and wonder if he would ever see Jensen again.
”I might have not,” Jensen admitted and tried to grin at Jared. ”But maybe I wanted to.”
”I hoped you would,” Jared said and took a few steps around the table to push himself in Jensen's personal space.
The air at the room felt thick and Jensen had to fight against a shiver as he closed his eyes for a second when he could smell the scent of Jared's cologne. They stood there for a moment that felt too long, just close enough that Jensen could feel the heat of Jared's body even if they weren't actually touching.
”God Jen,” Jared finally said. ”I just... I haven't really done anything like this ever, but I just can't...” his voice broke off at the exact moment he grabbed Jensen's shirt into his fist and pulled him closer.
”Done what?” Jensen choked out against Jared's mouth that hovered over his. ”You mean with a guy?”
For some reason it made him weary to think that after all Jared could be the one freaking over the guy thing. After the last time he had several times thought it over and over and when he could finally admit to himself that yes, he actually wanted Jared who was unquestionably male, he didn't want to think that Jared would tell him they couldn't because he didn't want a guy. At that point Jensen had to remind himself that Jared had been the one to pull him close, so maybe it was something else.
When Jared kissed him, hard and demanding, Jensencouldn't do anything else except melt into his touch. But it was over too soon as Jared pulled away and closed his eyes briefly. ”With someone I should only have a professional relationship with...”
”Oh,” Jensen swallowed. Relief washed over his body. ”I think... I think I shouldn't see you anymore.”
Jared backed off in such a speed that he almost knocked them both over. Jensen looked up at him, his blown wide eyes and kiss red lips and shook his head.
”I don't mean that I don't want to see you at all. I just...” he stammered. ”I think I shouldn't be your patient anymore.”
Jared visibly relaxed, his shoulders dropping and his mouth turning into a careful smile. ”I don't think I could have been professional enough to treat you anymore. God, I haven't been in a while.Not since you walked through that door I haven't.”
Jensen took a step back. He didn't understand what Jared was saying. Up until his last therapy session did he think that Jared had done anything unprofessional.
”What do you mean?” Jensen asked.
Jared's cheeks went slightly pink and he brought up one hand to rub his neck. ”I think I might have mentioned it last time, but I've... God, I wanted you from the moment you walked in. You were just so - you were so fucking beautiful - so fucking broken, and I wanted to put you together so I could have you. I've always thought I'm professional enough not to ever think anything about my patients or overstep my boundaries, but with you.... I even did things I shouldn't.”
Jensen concentrated on shutting his mouth, which he hadn't even realised had dropped open when Jared had started talking. He could see the quiet desperation in Jared's eyes, but he just needed to know.
”What did you do?” he asked feeling his heart pounding rapidly.
Jared turned away and bit his lip looking at the ceiling. ”I... You know the zone mapping excersise?”
”The one with the numbers?” Jensen asked.
”Yeah,” Jared almost whispered. ”I never do that to anyone. I'll have couples do it to each other but I never touch anyone like that. And God, the things that ran through my head. I couldn't stop thinking how gorgeous you were, how vulnerable and I just had to touch you... please don't be mad at me.”
Jared's voice broke off again and Jensen reached out to touch his elbow. When Jared glanced at him, Jensen could see tears shimmering in his eyes. It felt so weird to see Jared like this. He had always seemed so strong to Jensen and now, he seemed like he was slowly breaking in pieces before Jensen's eyes. Jensen felt so torn. He wanted nothing more that just wrap Jared in his arms, but on the other hand, a slight voice inside his head was asking him to push Jared into telling it all.
”I've said too much already,” he said. ”I... I'm sorry. I should have told you I couldn't treat you and recommended you to someone else.”
Jensen's head felt like it was too full suddenly. He couldn't get his thoughts straight as the images of Jared over him, behind him and watching him - wanting him were swimming around in his head. He had trusted Jared and Jared hadn't been truthful to him even for a single minute. He didn't want to be mad but now he saw all the things they'd done, talked of, differently. He wondered if Jared too, had come with Jensen's name on his lips even before the time in the office.
”I...” Jared stammered.
”You took advantage of me?” Jensen blurted out and it felt as wrong coming out of his mouth as it had sounded inside his head. It wasn't like he had been some weak little girl or anything.
”No, I didn't! ” Jared was quick to try and defend himself. ”I kept all my thoughts to myself and so hard not to do anything inappropriate even if I may have overstepped my boundaries a bit. I wanted to tell you, but I just couldn't.”
”Why?
”Do you know how it feels to almost throw your beliefs out of the window for someone?” Jared asked, eyes slanted away from Jensen, voice trembling just a bit like Jared was trying not to let Jensen know how affected he was by all this. ”I've always thought of myself as a true professional. When I figured out that I didn't really want to be a marriage counselor or just a regular phychologist, people warned me that with this field it was going to be harder to keep my emotions out of it, but I never believed it. And then you had to walk in with all your dry answers and pretty fucking mouth and I found myself thinking all the things I never thought I would. And the things I wanted to ask..., things that I just could just barely stop myself from asking.”
”What things?” Jensen asked, even if he didn't really want to know.
”How you liked something,” Jared mumbled. ”how you'd want to be touched. I wondered if I could fix you just by doing the things I know would drive a guy crazy.”
The silence after that was kind of epic. They had somehow migrated to almost different sides of the room and the space between them felt much larger than just the seven or eight feet it actually was. Jensen finally took a deep breath and cleared his throat.
”I didn't exactly have pure thoughts about you either. But until the last time, I honestly thought that it was just because you're the first person in a long time that I have been honest with about my problems and you didn't care,” Jensen tried to explain. ”I don't know. I think I need time to prosess this all.”
He moved to the door, but Jared caught his arm.
”You'll call me when you're ready?” He asked.
Jensen nodded.
”Can I...” Jared began but was cut off by Jensen's sudden surge of boldness, cutting Jared off and kissing him instead.
”I'm just...” Jensen said when he pulled away. ”I have to go.”
At the door, Jensen chanced a glance back to see Jared standing right where Jensen had left him, looking miserable. As Jared saw him looking, he twisted his mouth into a pitiful attempt his usually bright smile and said: ”Just, please don't sue me...”
Jensen's heart dropped to his knees at the sadness in Jared's tone and he realised that maybe that was one of the reason's Jared hadn't said anything before now. Coming clean like that gave Jensen so much power over him. It would be too easy to ruin Jared and his whole life over this one mistake.
”I won't,” he whispered before closing the door behind him. He had been ready to talk Jared into....well he didn't know exactly what. Maybe try dating? But all he felt like doing now was running away. With Jared's confession, Jensen felt shaky. It could be because falling for Jared had felt so safe, and now he knew they were both on uneven ground and wasn't sure if they were going to be able to find balance together.
The next few days he felt like he was walking around in a haze. He made it to work without incident on Friday and didn't have time to think about Jared once there. And on Saturday he just refused to get out of his bed until Chris barged in and announced they were going out.
”Why did I give you the extra key anyway?” Jensen asked as he came out of the shower that Chris had told him was mandatory if Jensen wanted to actually leave the house. Which he didn't but Chris chose to ignore.
”Because otherwise you'd lay on your sorry ass all weekend and have a one-man-pity-party,” Chris told him.
”I wouldn't,” Jensen said defensively as he pulled a shirt on.
”You know,” Chris said as he leaned against the door-frame on Jensen's bedroom door. ”Danni called me.”
Jensen turned to Chris so fast he almost tripped over the jeans he was pulling on. Danneel and Chris had never gotten along. They had tolerated each other mostly for Jensen's sake, but rarely wanted anything to do with each other unless it was totally unavoidable.
”What did she want?” Jensen asked.
”She was just worried,” Chris shrugged. ”Told me to look after you.”
”And you told her to mind her own business, right?”
Chris looked sheepish. ”Could be.”
”What the fuck Chris!,” Jensen groaned. ”Don't tell me you're conspiring with my ex-wife now?.”
”Even if she's a total bitch, she seems to have a heart in there somewhere,” Chris said. ”You loved her man, and I get it. You need time to heal but I just can't let you to bury yourself in the house and never come out again.”
”I've gone out,” Jensen said.
”In last few months after she moved out?”
Jensen stopped. He hadn't even noticed that it had been that long. But this was actually good. Chris thought that his weird mood was about missing Danneel, so he'd get away with not telling him anything about Jared. Chris usually found out anyway, but this way he could buy himself some time. And this he needed to work out by himself first since he wasn't sure what he wanted.
”I know it's hard, and you need time for yourself,” Chris said. ”But I think it'd do you good to see other people every once in a while.”
”I don't want other people.”
”I didn't mean you need to start dating or anything,” Chris waved a dismissive hand. ”Just put yourself back in the field.”
”You mean casual sex?,” Jensen said in a tone of a sulking three-year-old.
”Would that be so bad?” Chris asked. ”You're single and all.”
Jensen sighed. Chris knew that his and Danneel's sex life had dried up a while ago but Jensen hadn't let him know why. He had implied that they were fighting too much and asked Chris to mind his own business when he brought the subject up once or twice. So it wasn't like Jensen could just tell him that he wouldn't be able to get hard with some stranger, or basically anyone that wasn't Jared these days.
”I don't think that's a good idea,” Jensen finally said. ”But a friend invited me to a party in few weeks so I'm not just sitting here alone.”
”Anyone I know?” Chris asked. ”Am I invited?”
”Just some guys I ran into,” Jensen was in no way going to tell him where he had met Mike and Tom and his common sense told him that maybe universe wouldn't be able to handle Mike and Chris meeting. ”I don't actually know if I can bring anyone.”
”Bills, bills,” Jensen mumbled as he got his mail.
He dropped most of the letters on the table and opened his credit card bill. Danneel canceled her joint credit card that she shared with Jensen which was a relief since he feared for a bit an epic shopping spree that she might go on just before disabling the card. He ripped the top open and pulled out the bill. Weird. The balance at the bottom of the bill seemed odd. His eyes scanned the payments listed and almost dropped the piece of paper. All of his payments to Jared's office had been returned. He saw at least seven payments that were credited back.
Jared.
Jensen had given Katie his credit card details when he had started going there and given them permission to charge his card. The payments were going through as scheduled, that is until now. Now every single dollar was back in his account.
Shit. Did Jared think he was some sort of a charity case? Or did Jared just feel bad for wanting to fuck Jensen?
Confusion turned into irrational anger and Jensen fought a sudden urge to rip the bill up. He didn't know what this meant, but why hadn't Jared told him first and asked if this was what he wanted.
Mike's house was big and packed with people.
”This is like a friggin college party,” Jensen yelled over the loud music at Tom who he'd run into right in the downstairs hall.
”That's Mike for you,” Tom shouted back. ”If you want a drink you can get one from there.” He pointed at the big table in the living room. ”And if you want to actually hear anything I suggest going out to the backyard.”
Jensen nodded and went to get himself a beer. As he found the door to the backyard he saw Mike coming in.
”Jensen!” Mike shouted. ”I was just telling my boys about you.”
Before he could answer Jensen found himself being dragged out to the yard to be introduced to a group of guys.
”This is Jensen, our somewhat porn store virgin!” Mike told everyone as they stopped.
Jensen turned to him, horrified, but apparently Mike's introductions usually included something embarrassing since no one seemed to bat an eye. And when Mike started to introduce his friends, Jensen learned that Misha was the one to go to if he wanted to learn to be flexible enough to suck his own cock. And if he ever wanted tips on scoring with barely legal girls and not get in to trouble, Chad was the one to go to.
”And here is JT, who's so lame he shows up last every single time,” Mike said as he spotted someone coming to them through all the people.
Jensen turned around, and fuck if it wasn't Jared making his way to greet Mike! Jensen looked away and swallowed as he felt his breath catch. He was avoiding calling Jared ever since he'd found out about the returned payments and now he felt foolish about it. He sneaked a glance at Jared who looked really good and Jensen couldn't deny the fact that the guy still could get a reaction out of him by just being there. He tried to act cool even if inside he felt like he was stuck in a hurricane.
”Mike!” Jared greeted and then turned to the rest of the guys just as Jensen was looking straight at him.
Their eyes met and the look on Jared's face when he recognized Jensen was brief but way more intense than Jensen had expected.
”Jared,” Mike said, totally oblivious. ”This is Jensen. My new favourite customer. And Jensen, this is Jared, who hates being called JT but I'll do it anyway.”
”Hey,” Jensen said quietly his breath catching in his throat.
Jared gave him a slightly forced smile and Jensen could feel an almost physical ache for the open happy one he used to get from Jared before. ”Didn't expect to see you here.”
Mike looked from Jared to Jensen and back.
”You guys know each other already?”
”Sort of....” ”Yes....” They said in unison.
”Okay,” Mike said and turned back to his friends picking up a thread of a discussion that was going on before, leaving Jared and Jensen standing awkwardly side by side.
After a moment in silence Jensen tried to collect himself. Maybe he should say something about meaning to call?
”I was...” he started. ”I'm gonna get another beer.”
He turned on his heels and walked to the house. It was crazy inside and after getting his beer he caught a glimpse of Tom just before he disappeared behind a group of people, just before Jensen had time to head his direction. He stopped to stand by the wall and almost jumped when someone laid a hand on his shoulder.
”Hey,” Jared leaned in to half-yell at him over all the noise as he stopped beside him. ”I just... Can we talk?”
”Here?” Jensen questioned.
”Come on,” Jared motioned up the stairs.
Jensen followed him through the people and they ended up in a empty bedroom at the end of the hall.
”Mike's” Jared said in explanation. ”He usually locks the door for parties but it opens when you jiggle the handle the right way.”
”Do I want to know how you know that?” Jensen asked, trying to fill the silence that fell after he pulled the door closed behind himself.
Jared laughed softly, a sound that Jensen had missed more than he could have ever imagined. He watched Jared sit on the edge of the bed and pondered if he should sit beside him. He opted against it and went for the arm chair by the window instead, leaving a good five feet between them.
”You wanted to talk,” Jensen said as he sat down and looked at Jared who seemed like he was suddenly very interested in his own feet.
”I thought you'd call,” Jared said quietly and even if it could have sounded accusing, it was more of a sad remark.
”I planned to,” Jensen said. ”Then I just... didn't.”
”Did you want to?” Jared asked in a slight tone that sounded way too much like the conversational tone he used in his sessions.
”Did you want me to?” Jensen countered feeling hot and irritated.
Jared raised his gaze and rubbed the back of his neck in a nervous gesture that was starting to feel familiar. His hair fell into his eyes as he looked back down and he looked so much younger than his years when he finally answered. ”I hoped you would.”
Jensen picked on his cuticles and wet his lips slowly with the tip of his tongue. He didn't really know where to start. Last time they had spoken Jared had basically bared his heart to Jensen but he hadn't given Jared much in return.
”I did think about you all through the therapy too,” he finally said. ”I thought it was because I felt comfortable with you, but I guess it wasn't just that. I haven't really ever found a guy that I wanted to do more with than exchange appreciative glances and it baffled me. I thought that maybe I wasn't really attracted to you and it was more of an infatuation. I've heard that happens in therapist/patient relationships sometimes. Like Stockholm syndrome.”
Jared chuckled. ”You're comparing this to kidnapping?”
”You know what I meant,” Jensen shrugged. ”When you told me you had been thinking about it too, I got mad. It felt like you had betrayed me somehow and I think it was mostly because my sort-of-a-crush towards you was something that felt safe, and when you returned it, it became apparent that it was way more serious which made it harder to deal with than just a one sided crush on someone who I didn't think was an option in the first place.”
”Because all of a sudden I was on the menu?” Jared raised an eyebrow in a more suggestive expression than he probably had intended, and Jensen had to turn away as he felt his cheeks heat up.
”Jerk,” he muttered. ”Because it was unexpected. And then I just wanted to have time to think it through and I was planning on calling you.”
”Why didn't you?”
”The returned payments. I'm sure it wasn't something you meant, but it made me mad. Made me feel like some charity case...”
”No! I only gave it back because I thought that was the right thing to do. I was unprofessional and I don't believe you should have to pay for that,” Jared said as he leaned forward.
Jensen laughed dryly. ”I get that now, but I think you should've told me you were going to do it. It just caught me by surprise and I wasn't thinking clearly.”
”So...” Jared moved nervously. ”Does that mean we're alright?”
”Define alright?” Jensen asked.
”That you're not mad at me, I'm not mad at you.”
”And we can admit that we both wanted what happened on the last appointment?” Jensen added.
”Yeah,” Jared nodded looking a bit more relaxed than he had been a minute ago.
”And what if I kinda still want to do it?” Jensen asked feeling selfconcious.
Jared's smile widened. ”Really?”
”Yeah,” Jensen admitted.
”Good,” Jared said and got up from the bed. ”Does that mean I can kiss you now?”
He held out his hand and pulled Jensen up as he took it. Jensen didn't really know if he had answered, but Jared kissed him anyway. His mouth was just as soft and warm as Jensen had remembered in his daydreams. Something that he would never admit to Jared having. Jared's big hand cupped his cheek while the other stroked down his back. He brought his own hands up to rest on Jared's biceps and smiled against Jared's lips as he felt the weird strain on his neck.
”What?” Jared asked, not really pulling back.
Jensen shook his head. ”Not really used to being the one who needs to look up.”
”Get used to it,” Jared told him. ”I'm hoping that won't change anytime soon.”
With that, Jared kissed him again and his other hand tugged Jensen's shirt up from the back just enough for him to be able to sneak his hand underneath. They broke the kiss only when Jared started kissing down his jaw and brought his hands in the front to unbutton Jensen's shirt. Jensen took the hem of Jared's shirt and tugged it over Jared's head urging him to stop kissing for a second so he could pull the shirt off. They fell on the bed in a messy pile of limbs as Jared was already opening Jensen's jeans.
”God you're hot,” Jared moaned against his skin as he tugged Jensen's jeans and boxers down enough to reveal his cock. ”Want to suck you so bad!”
Jensen swallowed thickly as he felt his mouth go dry. ”You... You don't have to.”
Jared hushed him with a kiss that had so much urgency in it that Jensen could only hang on for the ride.
”Want to,” Jared told him. ”Been all I've been thinking about.”
He manhandled Jensen so that Jensen had his back against the headboard in a half sitting position and soon after Jared started to crawl down his body leaving wet open mouthed kisses over his chest.
”Want you to watch me do it,” Jared told him as he wrapped a huge palm over Jensen's cock, stroking it in lazy, slow movements that made Jensen moan aloud.
Jensen bucked up against Jared's touch as Jared jerked his cock slowly before leaning down to lick the head. Jensen tried to bite his lower lip to keep all the embarrassing noises he was about to make inside. Jared's mouth was hot and wet when it closed around Jensen's cock and he couldn't help but grab onto Jared's shaggy hair.
”Fuck, Jensen moaned and closed his eyes.
He had to drop his head back as Jared took him even further in his mouth. It had been so long since he had had this and what he had done with Danneel didn't even compare. Jared was making pleasure noises that Jensen had never ever heard anyone make when giving a blow job.
”You like that? he had to ask through his gasps.
Jared let Jensen's cock slip out of his mouth and just blurted a husky "Fuck yeah” before going back to work. His hand's rested on Jensen's hips, but not really holding him down Jensen had noticed as he give in to the urge to fuck Jared's mouth. His hand's were still curled in Jared's hair and he let one go to touch Jared's cheek and trace a finger along Jared's lips that were stretched open over his cock.
He had to open his eyes and look down to see what he was feeling and then it was suddenly just too much. He bucked wildly up and Jared's hand tightened over his hipbone to steady him as he came into Jared's mouth fast and messy. Jared brought a hand to the base of his cock and stroked it slow through the aftershocks. Jensen shivered slightly as Jared's tongue flickered once more over the now sensitive head before he crawled back up Jensen to kiss him.
Jared's mouth was warm, his lips tasting salty and Jensen idly wondered if he had ever kissed anyone after they had given him a blow job. Maybe not, he decided. It wasn't bad and he threw himself into it, tasting himself on Jared's tongue and lapping eagerly at Jared's mouth. It wasn't until he felt the press of Jared's hard cock against his thigh that he pulled back.
”What about you?” he whispered. ”I could...”
Jared hushed him with a kiss.
”Would you want to go home with me?” Jared asked looking into Jensen's eyes when he broke the kiss.
Jensen licked his kiss swollen lips and smiled. ”I'd love to.”
Jensen thanked his lucky stars that he had taken a cab to Mike's and didn't have to worry about leaving his car behind as he climbed in Jared's SUV. He told Jensen that his place wasn't that far, but Jensen knew the trip over would feel like it took forever. His whole body hummed with something he didn't want to call excitement since that made him feel like a pre-teen on his first date.
Jared laid a hand over Jensen's knee as they got to the highway and Jensen centered his thoughts to that wide palm radiating heat through his pants.
”You know we don't actually have to do anything you're not comfortable with,” Jared said calmly as Jensen twitched under his touch.
Jensen bit his lip and turned to look out of his window. ”I know that.”
”Good.”
They drove another mile in silence that wasn't too comfortable, but it calmed Jensen's nerves a bit. At least until Jared turned to a smaller street, then to another and finally onto a driveway of a small house.
He got out of the car with Jensen following slowly behind, taking in the scene around him. He didn't know what he had expected, but this wasn't it. Maybe something more expensive and modern? Jensen shook the thought out of his head. This was a thousand times better. Jared's house was ordinary and looked like a home. There was a broken, no, chewed, tennis ball on the front lawn and another by the steps.
”You're not allergic to dogs are you?” Jared asked suddenly and Jensen turned to him.
”What?” Jensen asked his ears turning pink. ”Didn't hear you.”
”Are you okay with dogs? Not like allergic or afraid of them.”
”I'm cool,” Jensen heard himself saying, his voice ringing in his ears like it wasn't his own.
Inside they were greeted by two huge dogs and Jared scratched their ears before letting out into the backyard, leaving the door slightly ajar so the dogs can get in when they want.
”They won't run off?” Jensen asked.
”Nah,” Jared smiled. ”The fence is really high and they know I'll scoop food in their bowls in kitchen while they're out there.”
Jensen watched Jared from the kitchen doorway as he pulled out a huge bag of dog food, the muscles in his forearms flexing as he easily shifted the bag. He had somehow expected that they'd be all over each other when they got to Jared's place and watching Jared do chores, like there was no hurry, felt odd and disorienting.
”Do you want anything to drink?” Jared asked when he finished with the dog food.
”No thanks,” Jensen answered.
”You might want to move from the doorway, though,” Jared said.
”Why?”
Jensen got his answer as soon as he asked the question as the thunderous sound of eight paws hitting the floorboards in maddening speed got closer. The dogs rushed past him to their bowls like Jared had starved them for days.
”That.”
Jensen laughed nervously. ”Thanks for the warning.”
Jared washed his hand and walked to Jensen. ”So, what do you want to do?”
Jensen flushed pink. The dog incident had made him forget for a moment why they were at Jared's and now it came back to him in technicolor.
”I...” He tried to find words.
”We can just catch a movie or something if you want.”
”I thought...”
”This?” Jared rounded Jensen up against the closest wall and pressed close.
Jensen could feel Jared's half hard dick pressing on his hip and he closed his eyes. God, he wanted to, but he had no idea what to do. Jared leaned down and mouthed over Jensen's jaw to his neck and Jensen shivered under his touch.
”I won't do anything you don't want to.”
Jared's breath felt hot against his skin and Jensen bit his lip to keep a moan in as Jared tugged his shirt to expose a strip of skin where his neck met his shoulder and nipped on it with his teeth.
”I need you to ask,” Jared said and sucked on the skin his teeth touched just a moment ago.
”Ask?” Jensen's mind was already hazy. He didn't know how Jared had such an effect on him but it felt good.
”Ask for what you want,” Jared breathed into his skin.
Jared's hand was already under Jensen's shirt teasing a nipple and stroking on Jensen's skin. Jensen arched his back and opened his eyes. Jared's mouth left his neck and he straightened to look into Jensen's eyes before Jensen reached up and pulled Jared in for a kiss.
”Please.”
Jensen didn't want to sound so needy, but he couldn't find any other words at that moment to express what he wanted.
”You want this?” Jared asked.
”Yes.”
Jared pulled him away from the wall and to the bedroom closing the door behind them. Jensen's head spun as he fell backwards onto the bed as the backs of his knees hit the edge. He looked up at Jared standing over him and pulling a shirt over his head. Jensen's mouth watered. He hadn't seen Jared without a shirt before and was awed by all that tanned, smooth skin. Jared unbuckled his belt (delted) and let his jeans slip down his legs before kicking them away and crawling into bed with Jensen.
”Let me undress you,” he whispered and opened the buttons to Jensen's shirt. He pushed Jensen's shirt off his shoulders and then his undershirt went too, over his head. ”You look so fucking good.”
”I want you....,” Jensen whispered as Jared undid his pants for him.
”I know.” Jared's voice was husky as he pulled Jensen's boxers down with his pants. ”So fucking gorgeous.”
”You too,” Jensen said, with a lustful grin. His hands skimmed over the smooth expanse of Jared's chest. ”Have to steal your work out routine.”
Jared laughed and rolled them over on the bed. His clothed cock pressed against Jensen's ass as Jensen straddled him with the need to grind against it. He had imagined how it would feel since the day Jared came with his cock between Jensen's thighs and Jensen shivered at that thought. He had yet to see Jared fully naked but it felt like he wasn't going to be disappointed.
”What do you want?” Jared asked bucking his hips up a bit as Jensen reached back to try and tug Jared's boxers down.
”You,” Jensen bit his lip and pushed his ass against Jared's cock as it slipped free from Jared's boxers. ”Want to know how you feel inside me.”
”Oh God.....”
Jared watched him with an almost feverish look on his face. Jensen watched his muscles flex as he flipped them back over and finally got his boxers fully off. He swallowed thickly as he saw Jared reaching for his night table drawer and pulling out condoms and lube.
”Have you been playing with that toy of yours?” Jared asked as he coaxed Jensen's knees up and apart.
Jensen blushed from head to toe.
”What? Jared asked, stroking up and down Jensen's spread thighs.
Jensen turned his head to the side and tried to avoid Jared's gaze. "I might have gotten a second one,” he mumbled against the sheets.
”Really?” Jared asked, his tone teasing.
”Maybe"Jensen said.
"Is it different from the first one?”
"Bigger", Jensen said.
Jared smiled mischeviously at that confession all the while his fingers getting closer to Jensen's hole, circling it carefully, before pressing against the rim. He hadn't applied lube yet and wasn't even trying to get in but all the nerves in Jensen's body were on the verge of explosion.
”Fuck me Jay,” Jensen moaned. ”Show me how good it can be.”
”Yes....” Jared moaned.
Jared uncapped the lube and soon there was a slick finger pressing into Jensen. And God, Jared's hands were bigger than his own and he found the right spot so easily. It only took a few slick strokes before Jensen was shuddering under Jared's touch and spreading his legs wider to give Jared better access as he slid another finger alongside the first. Jensen closed his eyes and leaned against the pillows. He felt Jared shift on the bed and then he felt the now familiar heat around his cock.
”Jared. You don't...”
”Want to...,” Jared said letting Jensen's cock slip out of his mouth. ”Not going to finish this time, though.”
He licked around the swollen head and pressed his fingers against Jensen's prostate. Jensen wondered if he had already slipped a third finger inside, since it felt like he was spread wider than before. All too soon he felt Jared withdrawing his fingers, leaving Jensen open and empty while he ripped open a condom packet. Jensen watched how Jared's palm slid over his dark flushed erection as he rolled the condom on.
”This could be easier with you on your belly,” Jared spoke as he settled between Jensen's knees. ”But you look so fucking amazing that I don't really want to make you move.”
”Then don't,” Jensen said and tried to bring his legs together behind Jared's thighs to bring him closer. ”In me.”
Jared leaned down to bite on Jensen's shoulder as he guided himself inside. Jensen leaned back and could only focus on the burn and stretch of being penetrated. It felt so good to be filled this way and he breathed slowly in and out as he tried to memorize every single movement Jared made. It was like at this very moment his whole world had narrowed down to the point where they were joined. Jared slid a hand under Jensen's hip and held him steady as he finally bottomed out.
”Breathe,” Jared's voice was husky and it took a moment for Jensen to realize he had been holding his breath.
”Good?” Jared breathed against Jensen's skin and Jensen could only give him an incoherent whimper for an answer as Jared rocked his hips and slowly found a steady rhythm that forced more of those embarrassing noises out of Jensen.
Jared coaxed one of Jensen's legs up higher to his waist and Jensen's whole body practically vibrated with pleasure when Jared could now get even deeper inside him. He quickly figured out that with just a little tilt of his hips Jared was hitting the good spot every single time. His own hard cock rubbed wetly against Jared's abdomen and even that small friction felt so good. A foggy thought of maybe being able to come just like this went through his head, but was lost when Jared snaked one hand between them and stroked on Jensen's cock.
”Gonna come for me?” Jared asked, low and hot against Jensen's shoulder.
Jensen shivered even if he was hot all over and felt his orgasm weaving over him as Jared scraped his teeth over his shoulder and tightened his hand around Jensen's cock. Jensen couldn't help but moan aloud as he came all over Jared's chest.
”So fucking hot,” Jared said grabbing on Jensen's thighs as he drove in just a few more powerfull thrusts before coming too and collapsing over Jensen.
They rolled over to their sides as Jared slipped out and Jensen grimaced at the stickiness.
”Messy, huh?” Jared laughed. ”Here.”
He grabbed a hand towel that he had put on the nightstand and cleaned them both off before disappearing into the bathroom. Jensen watched him go and got up to sit on the side of the bed trying to find his clothes which were all over the floor with Jared's. He was just reaching for his shirt when Jared came out of the bathroom.
”Are you leaving?” Jared asked looking puzzled and Jensen didn't want to let himself notice how good it made him feel that Jared seemed to care if he left.
”I was...” Jensen stumbled with his words. He hadn't done anything like this in years and didn't really know if he should. ”I don't have to,” he finally offered.
”Don't go,” Jared said coming back to the bed.
He pushed Jensen back down and kissed him slowly before settling down beside Jensen. His large form was a bit foreign against Jensen, but he was warm and tired and sleep came soon.
In the morning Jensen woke up as Jared moved closer behind him.
”You don't mind being the little spoon, do you?” Jared asked in a light tone that clearly meant he was smiling behing Jensen's neck.
”Dumbass,” Jensen muttered, but pressed himself tighter against Jared.
Despite being the little spoon, he thought he could get used to waking up like this, as Jared pressed a light kiss on the back of his neck.