curly-tailed rat
Simon, my oldest and most favorite rattie, has to be euathanized soon. He has cancer growing on his face, near his mouth, and it seems to be spreading fast. When i took him to the vet, he said he could probably go for months till it started to cause him problems. That was a few weeks ago, but it looks to be progressing faster than that. Simon doesn't even seem to be bothered by it, and i am trying to gauge how much pain, if any, he's in, and when it's going to be time. I'll probably know right away. I already took him a few months ago to have a big tumor removed. He had it for so long before i knew, the muscles in his back legs atrophied and he hasn't been able to walk right since. He doesn't seem to care about that, either- he's making up for it by dragging himself around and pulling himself up with his arms. Usually when a little animal like that is sick you can see a difference in behavior, but i just don't know with him. Hopefully i'll be able to spare him any bad pain. I'm going to call the vet today and ask her some questions- i keep putting it off unconsciously, because i don't really want to deal with it. I only realized last night how much i actually am going to miss him. I couldn't stop crying. No more ratties after this, for a long time at least. He was Nicole's first, in college. He was crazy and they didn't get along, but i sort of tamed him and somehow he ended up being mine, since they just never bonded. When i was living at home, i would take him for rides on my shoulder when my dad walked the dog, and i'd pick clover and stuff for him to nibble. He gets so excited when you handle him, he gets instant diarrhea- that's his worst feature, but we learned to work around it. When he was young, he ran on his wheel all the time, even when he outgrew it, which caused him to hold his tail curled over his back, and it just kind of stayed that way, ha ha!
I suppose it's hitting me hard because it's one of those situations where one thing brings out a bunch of other things that are upsetting, you know?
I think i'm going back to bed before starting the rest of my day.