(no subject)

[painlessemotion]

So I'm scared. I dont think ive been this scared in my life. I have portfolio review on friday to see if i can be in the art major. Its only the most important thing ever, and it's so stressful. I have to pick pieces of my "best" work and display it for all to see. Then i have to explain to the teachers how i feel about my pieces, what i did wrong, what could be better about them and so on. I'm so scared that they are not gunna like any of my works. If i get rejected then i basically throw my whole college career away. I'm not good at anything else. Another thing, we have stupid APO shit on thursday and I cant go because i have Portfolio stuff to do that i just found out about yesterday, and it was clarified today. I told lisa and she says i have to be there or i get demirits. Thats not fair. Pledges got to miss meetings to go home early for break. I ACTUALLY HAVE FUCKING WORK TO GET READY. I know i've known about APO for a while now but i havent known about Portfolio review for that long. I knew i had to set up stuff friday about 2 weeks ago, but it wasnt till yesterday that everything was told to us about what we have to do.

I have an exam friday, one monday and one tuesday and one wednesday. I also have a paper due next wednesday. I just need a little more time. This weekend is going to be so stressful. It doesnt help any that i am sick and i dont feel like im getting any better. I swear to god if i dont get in the art major im killing myself. I cant afford not to get into the major, i've already invested too much of my time. I'm so scared. I want this so bad.

Everyones telling me i'll be fine but i still am so scared. It's the most horrible feeling in the world. I wish it would go away.