I'll Be Here In Battlescars, Waiting For You

[paigearino]

So my life is really quite petty. I mean, really. I want to be with Chris again. I have decided. i mulled it over, I lost no sleep, but yesterday it just kinda snapped somewhere inside of me. Thing is, I'm not really sure what to do about it. I REFUSE to say anything about it to him. Mainly because I am stubborn and prideful and I feel like doing that would equate me somehow saying that I had done something wrong. He sent me this email that was really weird and random and was like "I got a job offer in New Orleans that I'm not sure I can pass up, but everything is really up in the air right now" and I replied with "Well, here's my advice: I think you should stay out of that godforsaken city, stay the hell away from renee, stay your ass here and give it another shot with me. But that's just my opinion." His reply was confusing and cryptic at best. I swear to God this isn't consuming me. It's not something that just hangs over me like the fog that is hanging over FoCo this morning. It's not like Anthony. It kinda sneaks up on me from out of nowhere and then BAM there it is, and I have to take care of it so it goes away for awhile again. I just don't really know anymore. I mean, I knew this was going to happen when I got home from Italy. That all this stuff was just kinda SITTING here with nothing happening till I had to come home and deal with it.

Pistacchio gelato, hurry up!