just something to think about when youre sitting there thinking 'what goes through that girls mind?'
llrk: how are you?
UtopianDreamChic: im alrighty what about you
llrk: tired
llrk: haha just got back from class
llrk: so whats going on? whats wrong?
UtopianDreamChic: umm idk. i guess im just moody today.. first day of school
UtopianDreamChic: its just that well i love everyone as of right now.. its psycho
UtopianDreamChic: but then like we went out to eat with like 6 other girls and then the 'popular kids' were there... and yeah im friends with them and i love them to death, some of them are annoying but the girls and boys are both really nice once you get to know them... but they started talking shit
llrk: its hard being loved by everyone
UtopianDreamChic: and they talked shit about ______'s hair? i was like wtf... like they were like her layers are like sooo short.. im like bitches, i have short ass hair, all of my hair is shorter than her layers!! im like wtf and shes a nice girl. so then theyre like yeah shes a really nice girl and stopped talking shit and i was like why are so many people so easily influenced by another?! cuz the minute one girl talked shit the rest started, then i said something nice and they all agree??? and then they said something about someone else and it bugged me so i sat there silent cuz its annoying
UtopianDreamChic: then _____ ate a piece of pancake off of the table and everyone freaked out... i mean if i was in that situation i wouldve eaten it too! dont waste food.. but theyre such girly girls
UtopianDreamChic: and it pisses me off at myself
llrk: at yourself?
UtopianDreamChic: cuz i feel like i need to change and be more girly cuz no guys can even start to understand me... i think the reason why i have so many friends now is cuz the girls see that im nice and the guys think im one of them pretty much
UtopianDreamChic: and im definitely NEVER gunna change
UtopianDreamChic: but its like this little fight i have inside of my head
llrk: you don't need to be girly
UtopianDreamChic: i mean like take me on a date and ill behave as nice as i can.. and i think i do a pretty damn good job... but i mean if you put me in front of people im not crazy over... you better believe that i dont give a shit what they think so i just do wtf i want
UtopianDreamChic: yeah i didnt think so until today
UtopianDreamChic: and then _____ sits next to me in _____.. and shes so nice and i like her but she just sits there and stares at me
UtopianDreamChic: like im some kind of animal at a zoo
UtopianDreamChic: i feel like everyone sees me as this really weird individual and maybe not necessarily in a bad way.... at all... i mean i can tell when shes looking at me that she is just interested in my individualty but its annoying when someone is just staring at you and asking you all of these questions about my fashion sense and shit... im like idk? its just the way i am
UtopianDreamChic: and everyone freaks out that i dare to be different
UtopianDreamChic: but i like it
llrk: well can i give you my opinion
UtopianDreamChic: and even though i NEVER talk to ______ anymore, he came up and was like love the hair and played with it... you know how many girls freak out because they crave his attention? well i dont give a shit and like i hate that girls dont try and stand out more
UtopianDreamChic: yeah... i would like someones opinion right about now
llrk: all those girls, and all those guys, they aren't individuals themselves. they do what they want because everyone else is doing it and because its what the cool people are doing and because they like being what is cool at the time. you don't. you do but not because you want to be like everyone else, you do it because you like it and you like being yourself. and i think that everyone wants to be your friend and all the guys can't help but fall for you and all the girls want to be you because they crave your individuality. but they don't understand that its you being you. seriously, so many people look up to you becuase you are yourself and you do what others won't dare and you don't care. you can wear some shirt other girls won't dare try on becuase its not "in" right now, but you see it as something unique and you use and and you make it look good and everyone else wants that. they would love to be as unique and individual as you are and thats something you'll have to deal with. people will envy you, want to be you, want to be like you, want to be with you, everything, and all you can do is be yourself.
llrk: and that is what makes you so special, that is what makes you one of a kind. you think for yourself, you act like you want to, and you frankly don't give a shit about what others think and people crave that freedom. people crave that individuality and that confidence.
llrk: i wish i could be like you and just get over a guy and move on to better people and not be hurt. i wish i had that confidence and that motivation
lrk: but i can't and thats who i am
llrk: and you should be proud
llrk: you should be proud that you have the power to make people listen, and to make people think twice about making fun of someone just becuase they have layered hair or something.
llrk: people look to you, not just for fashion, but for who you are and what you stand for
lrk: there will always be people who just follow the lead of the crowd and are too afraid to stand up for what they believe in. they'll make fun of someone all the time because thats what their friends do and they will fit in, even if they don't have anything against that person. they don't have the drive and confidence to go against the flow and get to know the person
llrk: and yeah, every personality has its flaws, every personality has its set backs, and people will always want to be someone else for a day. but just take into consideration how many people would love to be you, to have your drive and your passion and your character, or how many guys would kill to have you at their arm, to be able to hold and have
llrk: and i know you wouldn't change who you are for anyone or anything, because thats what drives you and thats what makes you who you are
llrk: and if you want to be friends with everyone like you are, you'll just have to understand that not everyone has that understanding abuot themselves and about courage and drive and confidence. so yeah it might piss you off, and you have good reason to be pissed off, but don't let it get to you. you help them try to think differently, and act differently, but don't try to change everyone. just being a pinnacle of someone who has themselves figured out, and has their head on straight and their mind aligned with their heart, just being that person other people can look up to has a lot of responsibilities but at the same time has the power to change so many people and indirectly change the world. if there were more people like you, society and culture wouldn't be detereating at such a momentus rate
llrk: you are that one shining light that keeps the world from darkness