Dis r serius entry....
Sorry I haven't blogged in a long while, I've been doing a lot of thinking and I don't usually post anything until I've made something coherent of it. I'm not usually this frank, but here goes:
I'm done with Philly. My relationship with Lauren has been up and down for sometime and as of New Year's, it's over. I'm thankful that our friendship is still there and I think it's gotten stronger in recent weeks. This is now the time to take care of myself, worry about me. I made a promise to her to seek some professional help when I get home and I'm going to do just that. Since I'm the focus now, which was hard for me to do anyway, here's what I've learned and why I've made the decision to return to Pittsburgh. I've seen that Philly is just too big of a city for me. It's unfriendly, violent and downright racist. I thought I could make it anywhere as long as I could make a few friends. I've made a few, but they're closer to "drinking buddies" than friends. I've learned what I need. I need my family (as much as they piss me off), my real friends, my pub, my coffee shop, my Penguins and Steelers.....everything that's made the Pittsburgh area "my city". I'm done with cheesesteaks, an EXCESSIVE Starbucks population, WaWa's, assholes, Love Park, homicidal taxy drivers, AND FUCKING FLYERS FANS! Give me Primanti Brothers sammiches, Sheetz, and courtsey on the highway!
It's funny that I came out here looking for opportunity, and I'm going home for a better one. Working for Capital Grille has been fantastic, but not enough to out-weight the things I hate. I'm working on a transfer, and if for some reason that doesn't work, I have two other offers on the table. I'll be living with my "whiskey buddy" Will this summer, but staying with the parental units for a little while. Insane as it is to think this, I actually want to spend some time with them. I'll also be able to study with my old drumming instructor. This experience has taught me what I need in my life. I had most of it and a change this big wasn't good. I'm sad that my relationship had to be sacrificed, but she's still my friend and I'm glad she's doing what's best for her.
There's one other thing that's been eating at me since we've come out here. I'm a "nature person", not a hippie, so stop there. When the weather here is clear, and it frequently is, it feels like an artificial reality. No definiton in the sky, nothing but asphalt and concrete as far as the eye can see. It's unsettling. I miss those gray skies and rivers. I didn't think "WHERE" you lived played such an important part in "HOW" you live. It might not for some, but it does for me. So, farewell, Philly. I'm going home with my life and hope intact. You didn't beat me. Fuck you.
I'm done with Philly. My relationship with Lauren has been up and down for sometime and as of New Year's, it's over. I'm thankful that our friendship is still there and I think it's gotten stronger in recent weeks. This is now the time to take care of myself, worry about me. I made a promise to her to seek some professional help when I get home and I'm going to do just that. Since I'm the focus now, which was hard for me to do anyway, here's what I've learned and why I've made the decision to return to Pittsburgh. I've seen that Philly is just too big of a city for me. It's unfriendly, violent and downright racist. I thought I could make it anywhere as long as I could make a few friends. I've made a few, but they're closer to "drinking buddies" than friends. I've learned what I need. I need my family (as much as they piss me off), my real friends, my pub, my coffee shop, my Penguins and Steelers.....everything that's made the Pittsburgh area "my city". I'm done with cheesesteaks, an EXCESSIVE Starbucks population, WaWa's, assholes, Love Park, homicidal taxy drivers, AND FUCKING FLYERS FANS! Give me Primanti Brothers sammiches, Sheetz, and courtsey on the highway!
It's funny that I came out here looking for opportunity, and I'm going home for a better one. Working for Capital Grille has been fantastic, but not enough to out-weight the things I hate. I'm working on a transfer, and if for some reason that doesn't work, I have two other offers on the table. I'll be living with my "whiskey buddy" Will this summer, but staying with the parental units for a little while. Insane as it is to think this, I actually want to spend some time with them. I'll also be able to study with my old drumming instructor. This experience has taught me what I need in my life. I had most of it and a change this big wasn't good. I'm sad that my relationship had to be sacrificed, but she's still my friend and I'm glad she's doing what's best for her.
There's one other thing that's been eating at me since we've come out here. I'm a "nature person", not a hippie, so stop there. When the weather here is clear, and it frequently is, it feels like an artificial reality. No definiton in the sky, nothing but asphalt and concrete as far as the eye can see. It's unsettling. I miss those gray skies and rivers. I didn't think "WHERE" you lived played such an important part in "HOW" you live. It might not for some, but it does for me. So, farewell, Philly. I'm going home with my life and hope intact. You didn't beat me. Fuck you.