I know it's not PC, but sometimes you gotta put the smack down on a hoe
Hmm...life lately makes me wonder. Wonder about myself, wonder about others, wonder about events and their justification. There's always a fear of coming out of ignorance with me. It's what fuels my denial i believe.
I am trying to cut down/quit the cig.s. I am not real sure if it will work out, but i am on this quest with Kyl and Jen. At least there's company for the long days and cruel nights i suppose. Today we had one every hour...tomorrow it's every hour and a half. Which i understand might not sound that impresive, however i was pround of myself. It was suprisingly harder than i expected though...time went by sooo friggin' slow.
I miss my life. I think that somehow i have lost it amidst recent events and happen-stance. And i dont mean anything deep i just mean the activities i used to perpetually do, i now dont. Like go to the book store, or read, or hang out with my vast network of friends, or just sit at home alone and have a relax day. Not that i dont enjoy the days now cause i do but i think i need to find a balance of what was and what is. Not only that it's time to stand up. God damnit is all i have to say about that.
I miss Melissa, Greg, Kat, Kristine, Leah, Blake, my sister, Rosemary, Alicia, and many others...but what are ya gonna do. And this week sucks cause i 'lost' 20 bucks somewhere Sunday. Hmm intrestingly enough i am in a church band also. Well i guess it's a church band. There's Thomas at lead vocals, Kyl on guitar, James on the drums, and me sort of on the piano and then kinda doing back up for Thomas on the vocals. Honestly they dont need me, and i am way behind on the whole musician thing but it's fun. But yeah so there's 20 bucks gone that could have gone to gas... -.- i hate 'losing' money. But hopefully tomorrow night will be fun, what am i saying i know it will be, i get to hang out with Rosemary and then go to Mama Margies with her to sing it up. And that little chica had better sing too cause lord knows she has a good enough voice to put us all to shame if she would only use it. But the night is late and my eyes are heavy so...
I am trying to cut down/quit the cig.s. I am not real sure if it will work out, but i am on this quest with Kyl and Jen. At least there's company for the long days and cruel nights i suppose. Today we had one every hour...tomorrow it's every hour and a half. Which i understand might not sound that impresive, however i was pround of myself. It was suprisingly harder than i expected though...time went by sooo friggin' slow.
I miss my life. I think that somehow i have lost it amidst recent events and happen-stance. And i dont mean anything deep i just mean the activities i used to perpetually do, i now dont. Like go to the book store, or read, or hang out with my vast network of friends, or just sit at home alone and have a relax day. Not that i dont enjoy the days now cause i do but i think i need to find a balance of what was and what is. Not only that it's time to stand up. God damnit is all i have to say about that.
I miss Melissa, Greg, Kat, Kristine, Leah, Blake, my sister, Rosemary, Alicia, and many others...but what are ya gonna do. And this week sucks cause i 'lost' 20 bucks somewhere Sunday. Hmm intrestingly enough i am in a church band also. Well i guess it's a church band. There's Thomas at lead vocals, Kyl on guitar, James on the drums, and me sort of on the piano and then kinda doing back up for Thomas on the vocals. Honestly they dont need me, and i am way behind on the whole musician thing but it's fun. But yeah so there's 20 bucks gone that could have gone to gas... -.- i hate 'losing' money. But hopefully tomorrow night will be fun, what am i saying i know it will be, i get to hang out with Rosemary and then go to Mama Margies with her to sing it up. And that little chica had better sing too cause lord knows she has a good enough voice to put us all to shame if she would only use it. But the night is late and my eyes are heavy so...