And again and again
So I just continue to put myself in these situations. Why can't I just learn that being around him just hurts more and more each time? Shouldn't I feel good to be with him? I mean fuck!!! He's all I think about. When I'm not with him I'm thinking about being with him. I am torn between wanting to make him happy and wanting to tell him to fuck off. What the fuck is this? I know exactly what is going to happen in a few days or maybe a couple of weeks: He'll abruptly pull away with no explaination. Like I'm supposed to figure it out. God I wish I had a pill that would knock me out for a few days... just to let this overwhelming feeling of dread pass me by.