Re-opening Old Debates
Yeah, its what I currently have a penchant for... one debate in particular, in fact, if I could find someone fun to debate it with, and my old sources for previous iterations... gay marriage and religious "marriage"... gods, I miss debating that. So long since I last did!
Now, normally when you turn your back on someone, it's a rejection, it is, in however small a way, trying to put that person out of your life. To see someone's back shows that they are being defensive, and it wouldn't be pleasant to approach someone who's back is (deliberately) turned away from you either because it then also puts the approaching person in the mood for a fight. But yet, gay sex brings this attitude into your most intimate relationships with another person, and I personally cannot see how it won't be a headf**k. And I have been there. Before we go into it in any further detail, I do want to say that having sex (of any description, I'm putting it all together) is a decision that I regret very deeply and probably always will. But, seeing as how I have, that does mean that I have the right to speak about it. We tried doing anal sex one time. I say tried, because we didn't get very far. Mostly only to the turning over stage. And. I. Hated. It. It was not being face to face, and not being able to kiss each other at the same time, and no eye contact and no hugs that made me feel like a peice of meat, of no worth in my self whatsoever and not at all that I was treasured or important or someone that someone else *wanted* to do anything special or intimate with. I felt bullied, I felt abused, I felt violated, I pretty soon removed my consent to this activity (which, obviously, was when we stopped) and I could go on and on.
Coming back to what I said about people turning their backs on someone, approaching someone front-on does make you more vunerable to that person. But if you're not vunerable, then there's no tenderness, and if there's no tenderness or no love, I personally would have to raise the question of why are you with someone else at all, rather than just, entertaining, yourself?
Disclaimer: I know that gay sex (or anal sex in general) is also about tenderness, and because it is taking that much of a bigger risk with someone else, there are ways it can be more vunerable than regular sex for some people. Or probably for all. Probably one of the other reasons some people hate it is that it makes them *too* vunerable. But I would hate not to have the option about it, and as I said earlier I would hate not kissing and no eye contact at the same time.
That did turn out to be slightly heavier than I had intended, and I didn't mean to personally attack you about any past, present or future decision that you may make to have anal sex with somebody, because that's between you and your conscience. Another point I do wonder about though, in genuine interest rather than sarcasm: From the athiest perspective, if people are not created with design, then why do we actually have two sexes at all? I know it happens a lot in the animal kingdom too, but the animal kingdom also reveals examples to us where this is not the case. Snails, for example, can breed by themselves (just one snail), and so there are no snail sexes. Seahorses, as another example, do not have the same sexes that humans do. "Male" seahorses incubate and give birth to the young. (The egg enters the 'penis' and travels back down to the 'womb', where it finds the sperm and mates; the young seahorse is then delivered by the father through the penis which obviously has the ability to dilate to a wide girth.) If all creatures evolved from the one root, with the bacterium life in the sea or genetic soup, then how come there are these differences? And how come the majority of animals do have this sex devide, especially when some creatures, like snails, have no sex?
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