parody song: Walk Like an Old Penguin

[ozma914]

 There's been a lot of ice this winter. Okay, there's a lot of ice every winter, but maybe a little bit more this winter. So, as a public service and because I can't control myself, I wrote a song to teach everyone how to walk on ice or, as the authorities put it, "Walk like an old penguin".
No, seriously.


See? I don't make this stuff up. (Actually, I made up the "old" penguin part, because if you really want to be careful, start worrying about breaking a hip.)
So, remember the Bangles and their song "Walk Like an Egyptian"?
Oh. You don't? Crap. Well, review the song first:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cv6tuzHUuuk



 Okay, now that it's in your head, here's "Walk Like an Old Penguin", which is set to the tune of ... well, I guess you know that, now:

Walk Like an Old Penguin

All the ice dropping down the roof
We do the ice dance don’t you know
If we move too quick (oh whey oh)
We’re falling down like a domino.

All the cars slide into a pile
They got insurance on the way
They’re on speed dial (oh whey oh)
More premiums that you’ll have to pay

Foreign cars with the broken bumpers
(whey oh whey oh, ay oh whey oh)
Walk like an old penguin

The business people on their way
They spin around when they hit the ice
Now they can’t move (oh whey oh)
A broken hip, it don’t feel too nice

All of us are so sick of snow
We have to salt and then plow again
When we see them fall (oh whey oh)
We’re walking like an old penguin

All the kids with the sidewalk skate say
(whey oh whey oh, ay oh whey oh)
Walk like an old penguin

(Sliding instrumental interlude!)

Take short steps on ice, don’t break your back
Arms at your sides, you got the knack
Ice is hard you know (oh whey oh)
So don’t get hit by a Cadillac

Watch the way you step, with flat feet
On your way to the donut shop
Don’t sing and dance (oh whey oh)
You’ll spin out and, take a hard knock

All the witnesses with their phone
Film it first, then call 911
They stayed upright (oh whey oh)
They walk the line like a penguin.

All the docs at the ER door say
(whey oh whey oh, ay oh whey oh)
Walk like an old penguin
Walk like an old penguin




You'll notice Beowulf is walking like an Egyptian ... dog.

http://markrhunter.com/
https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0058CL6OO
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/"Mark R Hunter"