I think....
i think i know who i really am until i go home at night and think about life. I am a complete fake. The only thing right now i believe that is true in my life, is the fact that i have a deep hole in my pocket from credit cards. I try and spend money on things i like, because i think it will make my life a whole lot better, and will buy happiness. Literal happiness. Thats no where near the case. When i look at my life, i avoid the life i dont want, i dont accept the fact that i am this other person. grrr.... i just want that...nice life....sooo hard to explain in words but so easy to feel in emotion. To only live in happiness instead of sorro, madness, depression. The be able to tell someone to shut the fuck up when i want them to, to not have annoying people constantly trying to talk to me. I have family that actually cares, not only cares in the heart, but to be a best friend. To just not want to feel like i should kill myself everytime i could have the chance. for once i just want to be relaxed, not take life so seriously, be normal. ( yes to all you guys that believe there is no normal, there is a normal, but everyone has there own definition of normal. )
Everyday, i wish that my best friend, my entire childhood life and teenager life has been set around this friend. and for the past 4 years, there has been absolutely no way of enjoying that friendship, the adventures. That was the time i felt alive, felt like i was supposed to be here. all that is left in one song, the song that reminds me of everything in the past, the times that i cared about life. Was so excited to get out and do something. the song..."i will come to you - Hanson" is the most cherished song in my entire life. of course this song could also turn to "With you in your dreams - Hanson". both of these are amazing and bring thoughts to your mind that nothing else could ever.
i just wish that...one morning i would wake up...and it was a total dream...wake up and everything was back to normal. or if thats not possible. just throw me in a hole and let me be.
and no offense, but i HATE FUCKING PEOPLE. the kind of people that dont let others be who they want to be. sorry danielle..but gays can be gay, your not them, so dont worry. Bush, go fuck yourself, just because your homophobic and care what the rest of the world thinks about this country, doesn't mean you have to go against the american people. You shouldn't be listening to the world. listen to the inspired people of the U.S.A. make them happy, not the world. Stop doing for financial status, do it because you want america to be better. and stop trying to be the world leader.
wanna be gay? be gay. don't listen to others, fight.
wanna be a religion your friends aren't. go ahead, your mind and body is controlled and believed by you, dont be anyone else but yourself.
wanna have 15 kids? go ahead, you will most likely be the happiest person alive, because you will have friendships like no other.
how easy is that to do? not very, seeing as the phrase, "easier said than done" is one of the truest statements in the history of man kind. you can say to another, just fight him, knock him dead, than for you to go out there and kill someone.
i wish that i would go to sleep and not wake up. i wish to go somewhere that actually existed, and if i believed in heaven, it would be there. i would be there with caring family, nathan, kevin, dogs, and a life i could never imagine. Just give me a night of happiness please? give me a way in life that wont make me cry every time i i think about it.
i hate headaches that i get everynight.
i hate depression
i hate death of family and friends
i hate george bush
i hate people poking me when i am already down
i hate rules that divide us, and create less individualisation
i hate the way parents push you to be who they couldn't be. LET ME BE
i hate conformity
i hate not having family here
i hate i hate i hate i hate life
i hate having to work so much and not having time for me.
i hate this city
i just hate life period. give me something to wish for. not just a phrase in a comment, but a true life.
IN 2005 I....
{x} broke a promise
{x} made a new best friend
{x} fell in love
{ } fell out of love
{x} did something you swore never to do
{x} lied
{x} stole
{x} went behind your parents back
{x} cried over a broken heart
{x} dissapointed someone close
{x} hid a secret
{x} pretended to be happy
{ } got arrested
{ } kissed in the rain
{ } slept under the stars
{ } kept your new years resolution
{x} forgot your new years resolution
{x} met someone who changed your life
{ } met one of your idols
{ } changed your outlook on life
{x} sat home all day doing nothing
{x} pretended to be sick
{x} left the country
{x} almost died
{x} gave up something important to you
{ } lost something expensive
{x} learned something new about yourself
{ } tried something you normally wouldnt try and liked it
{x} made a change in your life
{ } found out who your true friends are
{x} made a total fool of yourself
{X} met great people
Everyday, i wish that my best friend, my entire childhood life and teenager life has been set around this friend. and for the past 4 years, there has been absolutely no way of enjoying that friendship, the adventures. That was the time i felt alive, felt like i was supposed to be here. all that is left in one song, the song that reminds me of everything in the past, the times that i cared about life. Was so excited to get out and do something. the song..."i will come to you - Hanson" is the most cherished song in my entire life. of course this song could also turn to "With you in your dreams - Hanson". both of these are amazing and bring thoughts to your mind that nothing else could ever.
i just wish that...one morning i would wake up...and it was a total dream...wake up and everything was back to normal. or if thats not possible. just throw me in a hole and let me be.
and no offense, but i HATE FUCKING PEOPLE. the kind of people that dont let others be who they want to be. sorry danielle..but gays can be gay, your not them, so dont worry. Bush, go fuck yourself, just because your homophobic and care what the rest of the world thinks about this country, doesn't mean you have to go against the american people. You shouldn't be listening to the world. listen to the inspired people of the U.S.A. make them happy, not the world. Stop doing for financial status, do it because you want america to be better. and stop trying to be the world leader.
wanna be gay? be gay. don't listen to others, fight.
wanna be a religion your friends aren't. go ahead, your mind and body is controlled and believed by you, dont be anyone else but yourself.
wanna have 15 kids? go ahead, you will most likely be the happiest person alive, because you will have friendships like no other.
how easy is that to do? not very, seeing as the phrase, "easier said than done" is one of the truest statements in the history of man kind. you can say to another, just fight him, knock him dead, than for you to go out there and kill someone.
i wish that i would go to sleep and not wake up. i wish to go somewhere that actually existed, and if i believed in heaven, it would be there. i would be there with caring family, nathan, kevin, dogs, and a life i could never imagine. Just give me a night of happiness please? give me a way in life that wont make me cry every time i i think about it.
i hate headaches that i get everynight.
i hate depression
i hate death of family and friends
i hate george bush
i hate people poking me when i am already down
i hate rules that divide us, and create less individualisation
i hate the way parents push you to be who they couldn't be. LET ME BE
i hate conformity
i hate not having family here
i hate i hate i hate i hate life
i hate having to work so much and not having time for me.
i hate this city
i just hate life period. give me something to wish for. not just a phrase in a comment, but a true life.
IN 2005 I....
{x} broke a promise
{x} made a new best friend
{x} fell in love
{ } fell out of love
{x} did something you swore never to do
{x} lied
{x} stole
{x} went behind your parents back
{x} cried over a broken heart
{x} dissapointed someone close
{x} hid a secret
{x} pretended to be happy
{ } got arrested
{ } kissed in the rain
{ } slept under the stars
{ } kept your new years resolution
{x} forgot your new years resolution
{x} met someone who changed your life
{ } met one of your idols
{ } changed your outlook on life
{x} sat home all day doing nothing
{x} pretended to be sick
{x} left the country
{x} almost died
{x} gave up something important to you
{ } lost something expensive
{x} learned something new about yourself
{ } tried something you normally wouldnt try and liked it
{x} made a change in your life
{ } found out who your true friends are
{x} made a total fool of yourself
{X} met great people