Oziversary Post - Quote #20 - "I will give my life for you"
Title: The Words
Author: cmk418
Prompt: #20 - I will give my life for you
Characters: Dino Ortolani, Kareem Said, a few others from seasons 1 & 2
Warnings: Character-centric language, but if you're celebrating the Oziversary, you should be used to it by now
Summary: Dino reflects on a moment in the quad between Said and Keane
A/N: Happy Oziversary! Thanks for all of you who continue to inspire me!
“I will give my life for you.”
The words echoed through Dino’s mind long into the night. They were spoken so earnestly, but still…
What a crock of shit.
Kareem Said didn’t even know Keane. Were they bonded because they were black? Was Kareem Said going to offer up his life for every two-bit nigger in the joint? It didn’t make any sense.
For fuck’s sake, Keane wasn’t even Muslim. And his little brother was a faggot. Dino couldn’t exactly see that going over too well with the good minister.
Give his life, yeah, right.
He woke up, splashed his face with cold water from the wash basin and the thought crept in again.
I will give my life for you.
For all their talk of family, no one in Nino’s crew had ever said anything like that to him. It was expected of him, of course. Be a good soldier and protect Nino at all costs. That was the life he bought into. He was higher up than some, lower down than others.
But they knew him and they couldn’t make the pledge that Kareem Said had given to a complete stranger earlier today. It was maddening.
He wondered if Jefferson Keane bought into it. If he was impressed by that bizarre show of strength, will, or sheer insanity that Said had put on in the quad that afternoon.
Who the fuck asks to get hit?
”Hit me.”
“What?”
“Look, Petey, you’re gonna have to learn how to throw a punch sooner or later. You don’t want everybody thinking you’re a fag.”
“Why? Why would they think that? Has somebody been spreading rumors? Is this because I haven’t kissed Rosalie yet?”
“You haven’t?” Fifteen-year-old Dino was incredulous. Peter and Rosalie had been going out for about two months. Dino would have gotten to second base at least with a girl by that time.
Across from him, Peter was balling his hands into fists. Dino cracked a smile.
“Okay. Good, but keep your thumbs on the outside, then haul off and-“
“Ow!” Peter yelled.
“Aw, come on. You can’t say that.”
“But it hurts.”
“It hurt me like hell too, but you don’t hear me bitching about it. You gonna hit somebody, hit them. Don’t go crying to your mama right after for a bandage.”
He deliberately didn’t think about Peter whining like a girl as Doctor Nathan wrapped a bandage around his hand. His hand didn’t hurt on account of him punching Billy Keane. His knuckles were just fine. It was those asshole hacks slamming him into the grate that broke his hand open. They were probably afraid that he’d sue the prison if he wound up with tetanus or something.
He wondered if Doctor Nathan or if any of these hacks here would give their life for him. He doubted it. Most of them thought of him as a low-life. McManus talked a good game, but when push came to shove, he’d throw them all under the bus.
In the morning, as he watched Said go through his prayer rituals, another question came to mind. Who would he give his life for?
Nino, of course, because he’d pledged it.
Peter, probably, to a certain extent if (god forbid) anything ever happened to Nino.
Gintare.
Michael and Sofia.
What good was it to Ginny if he was wasting away in here? She and the kids were still provided for- the family had seen to that. But he was never getting out. What kind of life could she have? Coming here every week, getting to see him on a conjugal visit once every three months if he was fortunate, spending the rest of her time taking care of the kids or doing volunteer work at the church. She’d be better off as a widow. He’d tell her that when he saw her.
It didn’t go well. They’d played out many variations on the same discussion over the years. Most of them wound up with a phone call from Dino begging her to bring the kids for a visit. It might have been the fact that they couldn’t touch, but this had the feeling of being the last time he’d see her. He took in the sight of her beautiful face, of Sofia and Michael playing together in the background. He reached out a hand, pretending at contact, one last moment of intimacy between them, then walked away, trying hard not to break.
Ryan O’Reily was the last straw. Dino had temporarily gained an advantage, but in the end, he was just so tired. He didn’t have the energy to keep this war between them going. He wanted to be saved.
That’s when Said came along, appearing like an angel in the midst of darkness. He wanted to hear Said say, “I will give my life for you.” He wanted to hear those words meant for him. In the end, he knew Said could never say them and he could never hear them.
Because he was not the right color.
Author: cmk418
Prompt: #20 - I will give my life for you
Characters: Dino Ortolani, Kareem Said, a few others from seasons 1 & 2
Warnings: Character-centric language, but if you're celebrating the Oziversary, you should be used to it by now
Summary: Dino reflects on a moment in the quad between Said and Keane
A/N: Happy Oziversary! Thanks for all of you who continue to inspire me!
“I will give my life for you.”
The words echoed through Dino’s mind long into the night. They were spoken so earnestly, but still…
What a crock of shit.
Kareem Said didn’t even know Keane. Were they bonded because they were black? Was Kareem Said going to offer up his life for every two-bit nigger in the joint? It didn’t make any sense.
For fuck’s sake, Keane wasn’t even Muslim. And his little brother was a faggot. Dino couldn’t exactly see that going over too well with the good minister.
Give his life, yeah, right.
He woke up, splashed his face with cold water from the wash basin and the thought crept in again.
I will give my life for you.
For all their talk of family, no one in Nino’s crew had ever said anything like that to him. It was expected of him, of course. Be a good soldier and protect Nino at all costs. That was the life he bought into. He was higher up than some, lower down than others.
But they knew him and they couldn’t make the pledge that Kareem Said had given to a complete stranger earlier today. It was maddening.
He wondered if Jefferson Keane bought into it. If he was impressed by that bizarre show of strength, will, or sheer insanity that Said had put on in the quad that afternoon.
Who the fuck asks to get hit?
”Hit me.”
“What?”
“Look, Petey, you’re gonna have to learn how to throw a punch sooner or later. You don’t want everybody thinking you’re a fag.”
“Why? Why would they think that? Has somebody been spreading rumors? Is this because I haven’t kissed Rosalie yet?”
“You haven’t?” Fifteen-year-old Dino was incredulous. Peter and Rosalie had been going out for about two months. Dino would have gotten to second base at least with a girl by that time.
Across from him, Peter was balling his hands into fists. Dino cracked a smile.
“Okay. Good, but keep your thumbs on the outside, then haul off and-“
“Ow!” Peter yelled.
“Aw, come on. You can’t say that.”
“But it hurts.”
“It hurt me like hell too, but you don’t hear me bitching about it. You gonna hit somebody, hit them. Don’t go crying to your mama right after for a bandage.”
He deliberately didn’t think about Peter whining like a girl as Doctor Nathan wrapped a bandage around his hand. His hand didn’t hurt on account of him punching Billy Keane. His knuckles were just fine. It was those asshole hacks slamming him into the grate that broke his hand open. They were probably afraid that he’d sue the prison if he wound up with tetanus or something.
He wondered if Doctor Nathan or if any of these hacks here would give their life for him. He doubted it. Most of them thought of him as a low-life. McManus talked a good game, but when push came to shove, he’d throw them all under the bus.
In the morning, as he watched Said go through his prayer rituals, another question came to mind. Who would he give his life for?
Nino, of course, because he’d pledged it.
Peter, probably, to a certain extent if (god forbid) anything ever happened to Nino.
Gintare.
Michael and Sofia.
What good was it to Ginny if he was wasting away in here? She and the kids were still provided for- the family had seen to that. But he was never getting out. What kind of life could she have? Coming here every week, getting to see him on a conjugal visit once every three months if he was fortunate, spending the rest of her time taking care of the kids or doing volunteer work at the church. She’d be better off as a widow. He’d tell her that when he saw her.
It didn’t go well. They’d played out many variations on the same discussion over the years. Most of them wound up with a phone call from Dino begging her to bring the kids for a visit. It might have been the fact that they couldn’t touch, but this had the feeling of being the last time he’d see her. He took in the sight of her beautiful face, of Sofia and Michael playing together in the background. He reached out a hand, pretending at contact, one last moment of intimacy between them, then walked away, trying hard not to break.
Ryan O’Reily was the last straw. Dino had temporarily gained an advantage, but in the end, he was just so tired. He didn’t have the energy to keep this war between them going. He wanted to be saved.
That’s when Said came along, appearing like an angel in the midst of darkness. He wanted to hear Said say, “I will give my life for you.” He wanted to hear those words meant for him. In the end, he knew Said could never say them and he could never hear them.
Because he was not the right color.