Toby reflects on Chris.
Rating: R
He has a profile that’s strong; almost begging to be cast in marble thinks Toby.
He’s strong all over, but with a heart that beats and bleeds for one man alone. That man is Toby.
It’s his cross to bear, his salvation.
Gen never cherished him this much; she had a world of their children, her friends and family to rely on.
All Chris has is him.
He has no one else, not even his ex-wives matter really.
He’s never spoken of any surviving family, or kids.
He’s a man with no future and almost no past.
He’s lived by trying to be all things to his marks.
Is there a soul under all the lies and half-truths?
Does Chris even know himself?
All Toby knows is that Keller has him, and that’s it.
All his life he’s sought a purpose, and that’s Toby.
To keep him, possess him, protect him.
It’s driving him crazy.
He can’t hide a thought or action from Keller.
He’s under glass, transparent.
Every gesture has to be scrutinized for meaning, every silence filled with things he can be held accountable for.
Even here he has friends, Said and Pete. Chris allied himself with Ryan, but cares nothing for him.
All Chris attention and love is for Toby and Toby alone.
The burden crushes him.
He has hope for a future. And Chris?
No hope and nothing to lose.
He’s trapped by Chris’ desperate love.
Chris goes down on him, and makes him forget Oz for a while.
He comes, and there’s a blinding light in his mind.
He’s almost free for a second.
Chris can do that, only Chris.