(no subject)
So like... I guess I am dating a guy now. Before anyone freaks out.. It's really confusing... I sent him a message on myspace saying this and I hope this would clear up any confusion??
"If I am going to make this huge transformation I want to make sure it isnt silly. I am not like asking for a huge commitment or something like that but if I am going to like lose my identity as the lesbian michiyo I want to make sure it was right to do. I do not want to seem the hypocritical attention-seeker michiyo because I was once lesbian or something like that and I just went out with this random guy and the whole thing did not last that long. I mean, like I said, it does not have to start off as this strong relationship but maybe we can build up to that?? I do not know if this makes since I really do not know what you want in relationships and I am kind of scared because I really dont know what to do in this dating thing. Like, I guess I am focusing more on the role of it but I dont know.
and yeah, my mom will blow her head off. In a good way, though... I really dont know how blowing heads off are any good, though."
I wonder if that makes sense at all? I mean I still like girls. Its not like I will automatically not like them. but what does this make me? What does this make anyone? why do I have to live by a sexuality anyway? what if I can just end up liking who I like weither its a guy or a girl. I do not want to take up any sexuality but people think in labels and I guess I will get granted the label of a whore or bisexual or something mean cause people are mean alot of the time.
Oh and his name is Darwin but we call him Spartwin
He's funny and really nice and really fun to have conversations with
and we've been hanging out like ALOT it used to be just like once a week but it turned into more often than that and I did not see why not but the thing is, I can not be sexually attracted to him for some reason. Maybe I will eventually maybe it just apart of the whole process. I do not want to make that sound mean or anything cause I do not mean it like that.
"If I am going to make this huge transformation I want to make sure it isnt silly. I am not like asking for a huge commitment or something like that but if I am going to like lose my identity as the lesbian michiyo I want to make sure it was right to do. I do not want to seem the hypocritical attention-seeker michiyo because I was once lesbian or something like that and I just went out with this random guy and the whole thing did not last that long. I mean, like I said, it does not have to start off as this strong relationship but maybe we can build up to that?? I do not know if this makes since I really do not know what you want in relationships and I am kind of scared because I really dont know what to do in this dating thing. Like, I guess I am focusing more on the role of it but I dont know.
and yeah, my mom will blow her head off. In a good way, though... I really dont know how blowing heads off are any good, though."
I wonder if that makes sense at all? I mean I still like girls. Its not like I will automatically not like them. but what does this make me? What does this make anyone? why do I have to live by a sexuality anyway? what if I can just end up liking who I like weither its a guy or a girl. I do not want to take up any sexuality but people think in labels and I guess I will get granted the label of a whore or bisexual or something mean cause people are mean alot of the time.
Oh and his name is Darwin but we call him Spartwin
He's funny and really nice and really fun to have conversations with
and we've been hanging out like ALOT it used to be just like once a week but it turned into more often than that and I did not see why not but the thing is, I can not be sexually attracted to him for some reason. Maybe I will eventually maybe it just apart of the whole process. I do not want to make that sound mean or anything cause I do not mean it like that.