(no subject)
So basically, I've notice how anti-social I've been. I really do not have many friends and Its hard for me to make any more. Also, I've been acting weird lately in the whole sexual side of things or lack there of. When I think about IT, you know, SEX. It doesn't appeal to me. I mean not just dirty hardcore monkey-pounding sex but when I think about anything in that area. It could be just cuddling or kissing. It like... bores me. It does not interest me and sometimes disguses me when I think about it too long to try to make me feel anything. Then when I think about having a girlfriend its like ughhghgh I dont want one. Not ugh that I am disgusted but I feel like I do not need one. Usually Id really want one but lately it's been like "eh" and it's weird. So like I thought for a second that maybe I all of a sudden turned straight? So I tried to think of having a boyfriend and things in that area and its the same reaction that I usually get when I think about guys so it was not that either. So what is it? Its weird. I feel like empty. Not a sad-empty but a non-feeling emptiness that is just well... relaxed? and its just weird.
Maybe this is what asexualitymearen feels.
Maybe this is what asexualitymearen feels.