Angel 5x22 Not Fade Away (more thoughts)
Reasons why the finale was pitch perfect for me...
I am, strangely, not depressed or disheartened at all by the ending, despite the fact that in my head I believe that Gunn is dying, that Spike and Angel both may not make it, and that Illyria probably will. And that no reinforcements are coming.
But, oh, my big damn heroes, oh how they left, singing in their souls as they fought.
And it makes sense, because this show has never had an unambiguously happy finale. Buffy's finales have often been painful (Becoming, The Gift), but more of them have been hopeful despite the cost -- they end on notes of grace, of a goal achieved, of satisfaction. Angel's happiest finale was probably To Shanshu in LA, way back when the gang was small and idealistic (*sniff* it still makes me sad to think that Angel's the only one left from the original AI), and even that, after the reaffirmation of family and of their mission to help the helpless, even To Shanshu in LA ends with the shot of Darla, back to wreak havoc on Angel's life. I'm still stunned by TSILA and by that arc -- Darla, Angel going beige, desperate sex, Connor, Jasmine, W&H, and now, Not Fade Away.
There's No Place Like Pltz Glrb (sp) is for the most part a happy finale, much like TSILA -- they gain a new family member, they get home, only to be slammed with another piece of devastating news. Buffy is dead. Tomorrow gets even darker, and while Cordy gets to ascend to the light, Angel ends up in a box under the sea, imprisoned by his son, and Wes lies in the arms of the enemy. In Home, the gang must deal with the repercussions of destroying world peace, no matter how large a lie that peace was, and Angel is hit hardest of them all. He can't save his son. So instead he fulfills a prophecy and gives up the one thing in the world he loves most, and he and his friends end up in charge of hell, or a branch office of it. And yet, my gang goes down fighting in this finale.
ros_fod points out that Angel's plan does in some way make sense. He knows his team isn't the only one out there fighting the good fight -- there's Buffy and the newly awakened Slayers, there are people like Gunn's gang, and supporting them, making sure that life goes on, that good goes on, are the people like Anne, who fight every day, every moment. And Angel can buy them time. He's signed away his one hope through the years, because it's pointless now -- he has Connor, and Connor has already made him human, in so many ways. His team is tired; they've suffered so many losses over the years, so many gone already in the fight. They've sacrificed their consciences at times, their capacity for forgiveness and mercy, their moral compass. They've been stretched to the breaking point time and again, and each time they've managed to come back, but each time, it's just been that much harder.
But they keep fighting anyway. Because that's what they do.
And Wes, my poor boy, he's been carrying much of what all of them have fallen to in himself; he's only the most drastic example of what this constant fight has done to them. Angel's team has always borne the costs more than the Sunnydale people have because Angel's team has had to make harsher choices to keep going. Maybe in some sense they bear the price of the fight, in the way that Buffy has largely borne the psychological damage of her years as Slayer in lieu of the Scoobies. Buffy, in the end, can't let herself be just a killer, but Angel's team can do that.
And they keep fighting, and they keep taking on more and more damage and more and more death. So one final day, they tear down the house of evil in LA, knowing that it will be rebuilt. But they also know that the rebuilding will take time, that the demons they have killed cannot be immediately replaced. And maybe, because of that, there is one less apocalypse Buffy has to avert, there is one more kid helped at Anne's shelter, there is one more person who does not die at the hands of a demon.
It's not the desperate, suicidal, heroic, sacrificial leap at the end of The Gift, not yet. Because they're still fighting, because they're still buying time. And the brilliant thing is, despite the fact that I think they may be doomed in the end, they also may not be. Because when it ends, they're still fighting.
I am, strangely, not depressed or disheartened at all by the ending, despite the fact that in my head I believe that Gunn is dying, that Spike and Angel both may not make it, and that Illyria probably will. And that no reinforcements are coming.
But, oh, my big damn heroes, oh how they left, singing in their souls as they fought.
And it makes sense, because this show has never had an unambiguously happy finale. Buffy's finales have often been painful (Becoming, The Gift), but more of them have been hopeful despite the cost -- they end on notes of grace, of a goal achieved, of satisfaction. Angel's happiest finale was probably To Shanshu in LA, way back when the gang was small and idealistic (*sniff* it still makes me sad to think that Angel's the only one left from the original AI), and even that, after the reaffirmation of family and of their mission to help the helpless, even To Shanshu in LA ends with the shot of Darla, back to wreak havoc on Angel's life. I'm still stunned by TSILA and by that arc -- Darla, Angel going beige, desperate sex, Connor, Jasmine, W&H, and now, Not Fade Away.
There's No Place Like Pltz Glrb (sp) is for the most part a happy finale, much like TSILA -- they gain a new family member, they get home, only to be slammed with another piece of devastating news. Buffy is dead. Tomorrow gets even darker, and while Cordy gets to ascend to the light, Angel ends up in a box under the sea, imprisoned by his son, and Wes lies in the arms of the enemy. In Home, the gang must deal with the repercussions of destroying world peace, no matter how large a lie that peace was, and Angel is hit hardest of them all. He can't save his son. So instead he fulfills a prophecy and gives up the one thing in the world he loves most, and he and his friends end up in charge of hell, or a branch office of it. And yet, my gang goes down fighting in this finale.
ros_fod points out that Angel's plan does in some way make sense. He knows his team isn't the only one out there fighting the good fight -- there's Buffy and the newly awakened Slayers, there are people like Gunn's gang, and supporting them, making sure that life goes on, that good goes on, are the people like Anne, who fight every day, every moment. And Angel can buy them time. He's signed away his one hope through the years, because it's pointless now -- he has Connor, and Connor has already made him human, in so many ways. His team is tired; they've suffered so many losses over the years, so many gone already in the fight. They've sacrificed their consciences at times, their capacity for forgiveness and mercy, their moral compass. They've been stretched to the breaking point time and again, and each time they've managed to come back, but each time, it's just been that much harder.
But they keep fighting anyway. Because that's what they do.
And Wes, my poor boy, he's been carrying much of what all of them have fallen to in himself; he's only the most drastic example of what this constant fight has done to them. Angel's team has always borne the costs more than the Sunnydale people have because Angel's team has had to make harsher choices to keep going. Maybe in some sense they bear the price of the fight, in the way that Buffy has largely borne the psychological damage of her years as Slayer in lieu of the Scoobies. Buffy, in the end, can't let herself be just a killer, but Angel's team can do that.
And they keep fighting, and they keep taking on more and more damage and more and more death. So one final day, they tear down the house of evil in LA, knowing that it will be rebuilt. But they also know that the rebuilding will take time, that the demons they have killed cannot be immediately replaced. And maybe, because of that, there is one less apocalypse Buffy has to avert, there is one more kid helped at Anne's shelter, there is one more person who does not die at the hands of a demon.
It's not the desperate, suicidal, heroic, sacrificial leap at the end of The Gift, not yet. Because they're still fighting, because they're still buying time. And the brilliant thing is, despite the fact that I think they may be doomed in the end, they also may not be. Because when it ends, they're still fighting.