An ACTUAL Craigslist posting
This is what I find while I'm looking for a job at 1:30 in the morning:
This is a letter to who ever that guy is that works out infront of the Shell Gas Station on the corner of Monroe and Piedmont. I'm apologizing for having punched you that way. I wanted to prove to my cousin that you were a balloon, and that is why I punched you a while back on the sidewalk (the Mini car). Actually, the whole discussion started with our plan to scream, "hey, cell phone, get a job", and then I started doubting that you were a person and thinking that maybe you were a balloon. The truth is that even right after I punched you, I still thought you were a balloon. It wasn't until I got back into the car and looked out to see your hands moving inside the suit that I realized you are in fact, not a balloon. You are a real person and I respect that and just know that I did it without any intention of hurting you because at the time, you were only a balloon to me and now I know you are a person.
Sorry....
- It's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests