The Father: What He Really Cares About
!! Dear Whomever Gives A Damn !!
I really began to think about the conversation that I had with my mother last night, and I came to the unfortunate realization that my father does care - but not about me, or his grandkids. He cares about money. Always has. Always will.
For so long, I've been giving him the benefit of the doubt. Saying that it was my mother pushing him away and all this. Saying that mother was the problem in the relationship, which, I still believe that she was - but - I always believed that he'd been true to his word. I believed that he did love me, and that he did care.
Then last night and this morning, I realized, he doesn't. He doesn't love me. He loves his money. He doesn't care about me. He cares about his money. How did I come to that conclusion? When your mother says to you "after the e-mail you sent your father, telling him how I spent the money he sent, well you know" and then she tells me he called to yell at her for using the money.
He doesn't respond to my e-mail at all, even though that money took up only a tiny little paragraph in the entire e-mail that I sent him, he calls Mom to yell at her. He'll go out of his way to yell at Mom, but he won't bloody well e-mail his daughter back to say that he cares. He won't even tell me that he doesn't care.
How can I assume that he doesn't care, if he won't tell me whether he does or not? Okay, he's been ignoring me for a very long time. I've tried to make contact with him more than once - and he's never responded, but he'll go out of his way to yell at my Mom. Like, hello? That has "I don't care about my daughter or grandkids" written all over it.
Whatever. He's out. For good. Not like he's ever really been there to begin with. Asshole.
ox (! Tw!nkers !) xo
♥ ♥ ♥
I really began to think about the conversation that I had with my mother last night, and I came to the unfortunate realization that my father does care - but not about me, or his grandkids. He cares about money. Always has. Always will.
For so long, I've been giving him the benefit of the doubt. Saying that it was my mother pushing him away and all this. Saying that mother was the problem in the relationship, which, I still believe that she was - but - I always believed that he'd been true to his word. I believed that he did love me, and that he did care.
Then last night and this morning, I realized, he doesn't. He doesn't love me. He loves his money. He doesn't care about me. He cares about his money. How did I come to that conclusion? When your mother says to you "after the e-mail you sent your father, telling him how I spent the money he sent, well you know" and then she tells me he called to yell at her for using the money.
He doesn't respond to my e-mail at all, even though that money took up only a tiny little paragraph in the entire e-mail that I sent him, he calls Mom to yell at her. He'll go out of his way to yell at Mom, but he won't bloody well e-mail his daughter back to say that he cares. He won't even tell me that he doesn't care.
How can I assume that he doesn't care, if he won't tell me whether he does or not? Okay, he's been ignoring me for a very long time. I've tried to make contact with him more than once - and he's never responded, but he'll go out of his way to yell at my Mom. Like, hello? That has "I don't care about my daughter or grandkids" written all over it.
Whatever. He's out. For good. Not like he's ever really been there to begin with. Asshole.
ox (! Tw!nkers !) xo
♥ ♥ ♥