My magic RaRa slippers are smelly!
So I just submitted four college applications. I applied to all CSU's...Chico, San Fran, San Diego, and Humboldt. Man oh man just thinking about college is making my stomach into a knot. Maybe I should apply for more so my chances of getting into anywhere are higher. I just don't want to end up rotting in SWC with the rest of the fuckers I know that are going to go. I think it would be so exciting to move away on my own and get to know people all over again how I want to be presented. I'm going to turn into the little mousy girl that puts extra reading hours into the libary that no one cares to bother. I want to be successful so bad. But more spirtiually than financially. I just don't want to be so settled into a persona that fucks around always looking for a cheap thrill. I don't want to be my father. I want to rise so far above his silhoulette. Be everthing he can't even begin to dream. That fucker is getting laid off this December. After working 30 something years at the mill he is being put out of work. If I get into Humboldt he offered to let me stay with him. FFFFFF that. I'd rather live on the street thank you. I'm so scared. Its only security that I'm trying to act tough.