"And I cannot hold it in and remain composed"
Love's taken over me and so I propose the letting myself go
I am letting myself go.
You are my joy
You are my joy
You are my joy
You are my joy.
Once again I am procrastinating on my LJ. What a great place for procrastination.
Here's a really weird thought I had earlier this weekend:
The love and faith and joy I have experienced through my beliefs is enough to make me stay with Him and hold onto Him even if there are many factual signs that might say that there really is no God. I wish people could understand and want to understand what it's like to thank God for these amazing people in your life or to appreciate God's work when looking at a beautiful ocean with the sun shining down on it. Just to have someone to thank for all of the joy in your life....It's indescribable. ;)
Thursday night was the best. Ben and I went over to Anna's and we had absolutely divine Indian food. Honestly, we should all buy an apartment and live together. I can't think of a better idea. I told them about Commonplace (I think that's what it's called) and how these friends just bought a place together after college instead of moving into separate houses and they thought it was the perfect thing for us to do.
Then we went to AND. There were more DYC people than college-folk there that night so our small group ended up being me, Anna, Caitlin, Ben, Suzy, and this other guy Pete. I don't think we've (as in Anna, Caitlin, Ben, and I) have really had many opportunities to talk about things like material wealth or just life in general recently so it was nice just to hear them talk about life and how much we love each other. But we did it in a way that was almost objective (except totally not.) Pete, a 35-year-old guy, was really impressed with us and he told us that when he was our age he never thought about the things that we were talking about, or at least he didn't really hold onto them. I think it gave us a chance to examine ourselves and re-realize how great it is that we have each other and the community that we are a part of.
On Friday, my family and I set off to NYC and visited Wesleyan on the way. I like it. And then we went to Barnard on Saturday and I realized how much I would love to go to school in New York City. It's weird because before, I was totally against it. True, I could very well get distracted. But I find that there are so many more pros than cons. I would much rather be in the city than in some rural middle-of-nowhere where I would get less exposure to different cultures and experiences. New York has it all. There are so many internship and real-life opportunities that I think are so important. I guess the overall point is: I would love to go to Barnard College. And maybe check out Sarah Lawrence, too. (haha, Sarah Lawrence always makes me think of "10 Things I Hate About You" because that's the school that Kat got accepted to)
Something I noted about NYC (and it's probably because of allll the racial and social class conversations we've had in Education Seminar and the ones we had last year in Individuals & Institutions) is that it is the place where I see the most affluent people of color. Even though I know there are definitely people who are poor and living in terrible conditions as well, I definitely saw many many people of color driving a Mercedes or Escalade and dressing opulently. And I guess it's just an interesting observation. I shared it with my mom and she was like "Yeah, it's interesting because Boston is such a different place. There's so much more of a clear distinction based on your race while in New York, there's more of a mix."
Wow, I just realized that that is why I need to take Sociology in college. I want to study people. I want to know why our society is the way that it is. Yeees.
No DYC events for a while, and it's weird after seeing them for soo many weeks in a row. I miss it already, haha. Well, I guess it's preparing me for next year.
Today, I decorated my assignment notebook and it's looovely with pictures of all of the people I love :)
I love it!