(no subject)
im very lonely!
i dont have time or commitment enough to stay in a relationship, but i wish i could have someone...
shit happens i spose, but why did i have to fall so hard for someone i never see?! i spose when i do get to see her, its worth the wait...but its getting harder and harder to think positively...
no one can have a relationship with pink text on a computer screen or a quiet voice over a cell phone.
kim is who i believe i want to be with, every girl i meet i compair to her...
critical thinking and inner monologs of judging aspects of mine own psychie lead me to believe that no one is as good for me as kim.
here is the realy spirit breaker - im moving this summer, so i will be a whole nother 2 hours away from her, so in one day i will double our distance from eachother. i guess the only way i can look brightly on the subject is to remember that she will be 18 soon, and can come live by me, we havent really decided this, but its always a thaught lingering in the back of my mind with all my other hopes and dreams that seem so far fetched.
i dont like it here, i dont like the people here, aside from the few that i can call my friends and dont talk about me to their "other friends" or dont pretend to enjoy my company. i think moving as far away from alexandria is what will help me the most.
my pictures are gtting better and better, my skill is growing and i am becoming more and more happy with myself and what im doing...i dont feel cold and lifeless anymore, something has happend to me which has made me, for the first time, completely satisfied with the way things are going. part of this can be owed to the fact that i passed all my first semester classes and am well on my way to graduating with the rest of my class who i hate. i guess its a small bit of satisfaction that i can hold on to to shove in the ugly faces of all thoes who said i couldnt do it.
so i guess thats how i feel
im not ready for love, who really is?
i just want to feel like im not the only one who cares about me...
i want to be with someone, have someone with me, to hold on to and never let go!
maybe i will get my wish with someone new, i will have to start all over this summer!
here's to wishful thinking
<3
i dont have time or commitment enough to stay in a relationship, but i wish i could have someone...
shit happens i spose, but why did i have to fall so hard for someone i never see?! i spose when i do get to see her, its worth the wait...but its getting harder and harder to think positively...
no one can have a relationship with pink text on a computer screen or a quiet voice over a cell phone.
kim is who i believe i want to be with, every girl i meet i compair to her...
critical thinking and inner monologs of judging aspects of mine own psychie lead me to believe that no one is as good for me as kim.
here is the realy spirit breaker - im moving this summer, so i will be a whole nother 2 hours away from her, so in one day i will double our distance from eachother. i guess the only way i can look brightly on the subject is to remember that she will be 18 soon, and can come live by me, we havent really decided this, but its always a thaught lingering in the back of my mind with all my other hopes and dreams that seem so far fetched.
i dont like it here, i dont like the people here, aside from the few that i can call my friends and dont talk about me to their "other friends" or dont pretend to enjoy my company. i think moving as far away from alexandria is what will help me the most.
my pictures are gtting better and better, my skill is growing and i am becoming more and more happy with myself and what im doing...i dont feel cold and lifeless anymore, something has happend to me which has made me, for the first time, completely satisfied with the way things are going. part of this can be owed to the fact that i passed all my first semester classes and am well on my way to graduating with the rest of my class who i hate. i guess its a small bit of satisfaction that i can hold on to to shove in the ugly faces of all thoes who said i couldnt do it.
so i guess thats how i feel
im not ready for love, who really is?
i just want to feel like im not the only one who cares about me...
i want to be with someone, have someone with me, to hold on to and never let go!
maybe i will get my wish with someone new, i will have to start all over this summer!
here's to wishful thinking
<3