IC: Contact Post
"Hey there! This is Johan-- Iii! -- Oh, and Rainbow! Looks like we missed you, so just leave us a message, and we'll get back to you as soon as we can!"
((OOC: If you need to get in contact with Johan on the IC side, just drop him a line. Put "VOICEMAIL", "TEXT MESSAGE", or "PHONE CALL" (or whatever, so long as I can figure it out) in the subject ( Read more... )
((OOC: If you need to get in contact with Johan on the IC side, just drop him a line. Put "VOICEMAIL", "TEXT MESSAGE", or "PHONE CALL" (or whatever, so long as I can figure it out) in the subject ( Read more... )
... even so, knowing things doesn't make accepting things all the way easier. not completely. it doesn't magically erase the pain and the torment and everything else, something that he can see while Juudai knows, he doesn't quite understand just how bad having her inside of him, controlling him, manipulating him, using him affected him in the long run - hearing her voice alone is enough to hurt him. it was one thing to accept, on some level, that Juudai and her had fused, and it was another to comfort him and even say "it'll be okay" when she wasn't there, and that was dishonest of him sure, but it's a COMPLETELY different thing now that she's here - now everything has been thrown out of order for him.
he does know, without a doubt, he doesn't want to lose Juudai. but right now he just... can't handle Yubel. not because he hates her or holds a grudge, and yes, perhaps he does on a few levels, but there's something much more carnal there-- but that's not important now. Johan doesn't have a LOT to say anymore, after hearing all of that and after everything else, he is... pretty damn spent. But there is one thing he wants to be 100% clear before this call is over. ... and by now, except for a lot of breathing and sighing and other noises, it's probably been a good five plus minutes.]
... We're always going to be friends. There are some things we just don't agree on, and some things we may not understand about each other, and some things that really really confuse me, but even with all of that, and even if there were a million other things, I will never not be your friend, no matter what happens. So don't ever question that.
I just... I need... I don't know, but-- [he sighs] Just don't forget that, Juudai. Please.
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I feel bad for having to put an axe in everything, and for a lot of other things, but... it's important to me that I sort this out first. She'd be even more dangerous if I didn't.
Someday, it'll work out. That day isn't today, or tomorrow, but it will come. Just think about it, work yourself out first, and then maybe once I tame her a bit... I can prove it to you.
...You're still pretty high up there among the important people in my life. One of the highest. So I won't forget, ever. I'll hold you to it, actually. This kind of obstacle is nothing we can't handle, right?
[By the end of his statement, he sounds a little more optimistic and hopeful.]
Maybe you won't want to talk to me for a while after this, and if that's what you need to do, then do it, but I'll be there for you, too, even if you don't see it.
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You'd better.
[he shakes his head-- his own tone may not match Juudai's exactly, but he's certainly sounding somewhat clearer at least.]
I see it. I just... need some space for a little while, I think. But afterwards-- ... Yeah.
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Alright, then... as long as we're settled about that. Thank you for hearing me out, at least.
[Then, more slowly and heartfelt:] ...Really... thank you.
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Yeah. [he pauses, and with a little heartfeltness of his own in with the rest of emotions.] You're welcome.
Just... No matter what I decide on, I know you'll do the same for me when I'm ready to cross the bridge too.
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