Sporking With Michael - TCoSA Finale
*Mikey sits alone in the darkness; dark thoughts stir in his head, but one thought is more clear than all others.*
Mikey: Sono...Sueno...Sue...
*The door creaks open letting a small light in.*
???: Are you ready?
*Mikey turns his head to face the person; face white as a sheet, and sighs*
Mikey: I suppose.
???: You put more effort into that than usual.
Mikey: Shut it, i'm in a bad mood Haruhi.
Haruhi: Awww you destroyed the mood!
*She stomps into the room followed by Kyon and the rest of her brigade.*
Mikey: Wait a sec. *Counts everyone.* Five... six... seven.... What the heck are they doing here!?
Tsuruya: We're gonna have fun!
Kyon's Little Sister: Wow I've never sporked before.
Haruhi: I was thinking we could try one of those script types like you saw on that other live journal. Link: Warning Horrible Fanfic, Great Sporking
Mikey: Whatever, we really didn't need more people for that.
Haruhi: Whatever!
Mikey: I'd like to say something before we begin.
Haruhi: Just hurry it up.
Mikey: Yeah. *As everyone takes a seat as he gets up infront to make a speech.*
It's been great, I mean it. I wanna thank everyone who helped me, everyone who's read this story, and in some twisted way Sono for bringing us together with his/her horrible fanfic. I wanna say I have no personal issue against Sono the author. Yes I've enjoyed a good joke at his/her expense... okay his expense - I read ahead, but at the end of the day I don't know Sono and so I can't really judge him as a person. A bad fanfic doesn't make a bad person. So no hard feelings Sono, even though; and I say this as politely as my none sporking personality can let me, your fanfic is dreadful and totally deserves this treatment. That is all.
*Everyone claps as Michael takes his seat*
Haruhi: Alright- This is a script so we can get this over quickly for all of our sakes.
Kyon: How generous of you.
Haruhi: I'm always like this!
Mikey: I'm gonna narrate-
Kyon's Sister: I wanna be Ani!
Tsuruya: I wanna be me~ nyoro.
Yuki: I'm not in this.
Kyon: You can be Sono herself.
Yuki: *Nods*
Itsuki: I'll be Mori.
Everyone: Let's do this!
-
Haruhi: Basically admits she was bored.
Mikuru: Ricky admits he's a guy and doesn't own Haruhi.
Yuki: But owns Sono.
Mikey: Sono walked into a cafe and was shocked by Mori being there for no real reason since Mori knew about the reunion party.
Itsuki/Mori: Lady Sono; the one who regurgitates rainbows and blesses our unworthy souls with her greatness, please tell us what you shall be doing from this points on.
Yuki/Sono: I am going to post this exact fanfic up for no reason other than my own smug self satisfaction. I will show I ignore my critics and I will also ignore those you clearly point out that it is aginst the rules. Now here is a gift for you Mori, even though you have been featured for a grand total of time that is lesser than four minutes in this fanfic.
Mikey: She gives Mori an SOS Brigade armband that says Mascot's Friend and there is a lot of needless caps.
Itsuki/Mori: What a completely useless honor, thank you oh great Goddess... Haruhi who?
Tsuruya/Self: Ha-ha-ha! Okay I'm done! *Leaves*
Mikey: No seriously that's it. It's like she just remembered her, but realized she's to lazy to write anything and she's only human so not worthy of Sono's love~ It's like Bella Swan really, all must flock around her, but only sparkly vampires and ripped werewolves are worthy of her love and acknowledgement.
Lucky Tsuruya....
She then says that she has finally consumed all of Mikuru's plot importance by being the mascot of the SOS Brigade even though I though she already the a mascot.
Some incoherient rambling about Guitar Hero and Drums; dumping all of the fake humility from last chapter, and how awesome she is.
Haruhi/Self: Let's play music so Sono can play the drums.
Yuki/Sono: We will sing "Lost My Music".
Mikey: It's like this fanfic was written using some kind of Mad Libs book. Insert name here <>. Insert song title here <>.
Kyon: I remember Haruhi sang that... okay that was my only line. Anyone remember when I was the main character of series.
Kyon's Little Sister/Ani: Technically you don't even finish the line Kyon, I get to because as one of her OC's I have to steal someone's limelight.
-in our first year of high school.
Mikuru/Self: But oh wondrous Sono, however did you learn the lyrics... wait didn't ENOZ give the song away if people brought Mini Disks?
Mikey: You wish it was that.
Yuki/Sono: I'm a savant. I heard the song once and memorized both the lyrics and the other musical keys that it would take a normal human months of practice to even begin to understand.
MIkey: Then Sono, Haruhi, Sono, Yuki; who was apparently there even though she didn't say or do anything, Sono, Ani, Sono, and in case I forgot Sono played the song and Haruhi let her sing with her.
Sono's life was better than ever... no really she says Life is getting better than ever...
Yuki/Sono: Praise me!
Mikey: Obligitory don't say mean crap. Only praise me. Then some threats about a sequel.
Everyone: END!
-
Mikey: Great idea Haruhi, that was a nice change of pace.
Haruhi: I knew it would be!
Mikey: Yeah... I guess I should be going.
Haruhi: W-what!? We're having so much fun!
Mikey: Listen I had fun to, but if I just stayed in your fandom's canon realm all day then I'd be no better than Sono.
Haruhi: Just when something weird was happening to.*Places his hand on Haruhi's shoulder* Kyon?
Kyon: We'll see you again Mike.
Haruhi: We will?
Mikey: Sure thing.
Haruhi: Really!?
Mikey: Sure, you helped me spork once, maybe we'll do it again sometime.
Haruhi: Hold on. *Pushes past everyone and out the door. She comes back a few minutes later with an armband*
Mikey: An armband. Please say it's not a shout out to the fanfic.
Haruhi: No way! I'm making you the SOS Brigade's Sporker.
Mikey: You do know that when I leave all memory of me is taken as well right? Unless I show up again or you're in this room you won't remember me.
Haruhi: I figured that, but call on us anytime you need an extra hand anyway.
Mikey: Seriously?
*Everyone nods*
Mikey: Everyone... Thanks.
*Everyone starts to leave*
Mikey: Um- Kyon wait!
Kyon: What is it?
Mikey: Sorry about calling you a sinner because of the glasses thing. Your not such a bad guy... your actually kinda cute...
Kyon: I'm outta here! *Runs out the door*
Mikey: Glasses hating jerk. *Smiles*
THE END
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..
...
Mikey: Wait a moment...did she imply ItsukixMori? Did she imply Koizumi wasn't gay!? I'm turnin' this room around!
THE END!?
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