A Rough Day
I didn't want to post this over on Facebook, but livejournal seems like as good a place as any.
I'm having a bit of a rough day. I've been trying to make plans to meet up with someone (from OKCupid) for a month or three, now. Each time, she's bailed at the last minute.
This time, I really thought it might work out, but she bailed again, and it turned into a fairly heated dicsussion via test message. We've been miscommunicating - she'd told me in the past that I should 'gently pressure' her, but apparently she forgot that. I'd been doing it, and it was friggin' hard because it's not really who I am, but I did the best I could with it, trying very hard to keep everything well into the realms I'd normally be comfortable with, with just a hint of that.
Turns out she forgets having told me that.
So here I am, having caused difficulty and pain for this other person when what I was trying to do was what she'd asked. Or, what I *thought* she'd asked.
And she's explaining that she's neurotic, and that last weekend she met up with a woman from OKCupid who offered for her to move in after the first date. At least that made me laugh, but the context is that she's totally freaked out about meeting people, and what their expectations are, regarding the future.
I shouldn't ever have done these interactions, and I just really don't know what to do right now.
But finding out that I've caused someone pain and stress, and made her feel pressured? That makes me feel like SHIT, even if I did it with 'good intentions' and based on her advice to me. Which I probably misheard or misinterpreted badly.
I'm having a bit of a rough day. I've been trying to make plans to meet up with someone (from OKCupid) for a month or three, now. Each time, she's bailed at the last minute.
This time, I really thought it might work out, but she bailed again, and it turned into a fairly heated dicsussion via test message. We've been miscommunicating - she'd told me in the past that I should 'gently pressure' her, but apparently she forgot that. I'd been doing it, and it was friggin' hard because it's not really who I am, but I did the best I could with it, trying very hard to keep everything well into the realms I'd normally be comfortable with, with just a hint of that.
Turns out she forgets having told me that.
So here I am, having caused difficulty and pain for this other person when what I was trying to do was what she'd asked. Or, what I *thought* she'd asked.
And she's explaining that she's neurotic, and that last weekend she met up with a woman from OKCupid who offered for her to move in after the first date. At least that made me laugh, but the context is that she's totally freaked out about meeting people, and what their expectations are, regarding the future.
I shouldn't ever have done these interactions, and I just really don't know what to do right now.
But finding out that I've caused someone pain and stress, and made her feel pressured? That makes me feel like SHIT, even if I did it with 'good intentions' and based on her advice to me. Which I probably misheard or misinterpreted badly.