The subject matter doesn't matter.
My legs feel like jello and I have a headache.
I can't s h a k e the feeling that I'm not getting as much as I put in, into anything..
I can't sleep as peacefully at night like I used to.
I'm awake right now.
I want to be asleep.
And I can't.
Life is getting too confusing and too stressful.
It's always like that though. Not a moment's rest.
Found out about an hour ago that a guy I used to hang out with tried to kill himself, and he just got out of the Psyche ward a week ago.
Too much is going on to sit down and truly enjoy the good moments in life..and even so, those moments are few and far between seemingly..
I told myself I was going to sit down and try to start on my book tonight, but I don't have the strength and the subject matter is too depressing.
I'm accomplishing nothing. And whining profusely about everything.
I deserve a punch in the mouth.
Eleven more minutes until midnight. Another day starts tomorrow. People will get up, and go to work. Some of them will be working towards a cure for cancer. Others will be running their highly profitable business, and some will be constructing pieces of art or working on pieces of literature soon to be published. Every day someone wakes up and strives for the unattainable, to become great, or to achieve something great.
Tomorrow. For me. I am going to wake up and go to work in a game store where I will accomplish nothing and affect no one. I will do absolutely nothing meaningful. And when I leave work I will go home and realize that I am contributing nothing to society or to anyone else in general, and I will feel all the more hollow.
With that in mind, it is now 12:03 AM. Time for sleep.
I can't s h a k e the feeling that I'm not getting as much as I put in, into anything..
I can't sleep as peacefully at night like I used to.
I'm awake right now.
I want to be asleep.
And I can't.
Life is getting too confusing and too stressful.
It's always like that though. Not a moment's rest.
Found out about an hour ago that a guy I used to hang out with tried to kill himself, and he just got out of the Psyche ward a week ago.
Too much is going on to sit down and truly enjoy the good moments in life..and even so, those moments are few and far between seemingly..
I told myself I was going to sit down and try to start on my book tonight, but I don't have the strength and the subject matter is too depressing.
I'm accomplishing nothing. And whining profusely about everything.
I deserve a punch in the mouth.
Eleven more minutes until midnight. Another day starts tomorrow. People will get up, and go to work. Some of them will be working towards a cure for cancer. Others will be running their highly profitable business, and some will be constructing pieces of art or working on pieces of literature soon to be published. Every day someone wakes up and strives for the unattainable, to become great, or to achieve something great.
Tomorrow. For me. I am going to wake up and go to work in a game store where I will accomplish nothing and affect no one. I will do absolutely nothing meaningful. And when I leave work I will go home and realize that I am contributing nothing to society or to anyone else in general, and I will feel all the more hollow.
With that in mind, it is now 12:03 AM. Time for sleep.