Just keep our eyes closed 'til the end.
I must admit that I am a little challenged by my current work status. I didn't think I'd ever be laid off, but then again this company was close to going under before. I do not know how I am going to feel about it when I get up each day, nor what could develop with it. I've had days where I've been apathetic, laid back, then other days where it just feels like someone took the breath out of me, to even sometimes being optimistic. The situation has changed at least a handful of times and I am merely two weeks in. It's gone from My Father and I having a job, to just him, or just me, or neither of us. With Mark being interchangeable in the whole scenario. Of course, thats a bit of a story in itself.
I really do not know what course to take, though I've definitely been through the motions of anything you could dream up. From getting a 'floater' job and going to school, trying to find something similar, or even collecting unemployment for awhile. I think all in all the most upsetting thing is the thought that I'll have to once again rebuild everything from the start. I mean you could scroll down and read in past posts about how I knew this job was going to get me somewhere I needed to be. The catch this time is I have much more to be responsible for. It's just a real killer knowing that after the struggle to get to this point that its going to be pull out from underneath me.
Because of it's ever-changing status I just feel so lost on what to do. I can't even really form a plan. I just despise this lost feeling.
That aside Christmas feels non-existent this year. Not even a tree up, and I cannot even pull myself up to put the smaller one up in my room, even though it could be somewhat a relaxing sight that I so very much need. Not to mention I am behind on shopping, I've bought one gift that will most likely not be here in time. That's it, and the day is little more than a week way. Not to mention the recent reminder that around this time of year whats left of my family has been trying to rebuild to what we once were, only to be torn down by one vile, egotistical, person that seriously needs a lesson.
Anyway, I needed to vent. We shall see where things go from here.
I really do not know what course to take, though I've definitely been through the motions of anything you could dream up. From getting a 'floater' job and going to school, trying to find something similar, or even collecting unemployment for awhile. I think all in all the most upsetting thing is the thought that I'll have to once again rebuild everything from the start. I mean you could scroll down and read in past posts about how I knew this job was going to get me somewhere I needed to be. The catch this time is I have much more to be responsible for. It's just a real killer knowing that after the struggle to get to this point that its going to be pull out from underneath me.
Because of it's ever-changing status I just feel so lost on what to do. I can't even really form a plan. I just despise this lost feeling.
That aside Christmas feels non-existent this year. Not even a tree up, and I cannot even pull myself up to put the smaller one up in my room, even though it could be somewhat a relaxing sight that I so very much need. Not to mention I am behind on shopping, I've bought one gift that will most likely not be here in time. That's it, and the day is little more than a week way. Not to mention the recent reminder that around this time of year whats left of my family has been trying to rebuild to what we once were, only to be torn down by one vile, egotistical, person that seriously needs a lesson.
Anyway, I needed to vent. We shall see where things go from here.