Running away

[purplerhino]

Who: Scraps, Glitch, and Sarah
Where: Ambrose’s lab then elsewhere
What: Some unexpected (yeah right)
When: January 21st. Noonish

Glitch watched Scraps work, hunched over the table.  There was this little line between her coppery eyebrows and she looked at the box in her hand, then at the schematics that the other part of him had three

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[rebelyell_sarah]

A book was cradled in her grasp as she walked down the hall. The main library was just in sight down the hall, its massive, ornate double doors opened in welcome. The library was a place Sarah knew well, and she had yet to tire of it. Of course that would have been an impressive feat, given how large the room was. But her quest for knowledge was about to continue as she returned one book and searched for another.

Until there was a small crash against her body. Scraps' weight forced Sarah back a step or two, her brow furrowing as she tried to figure out what the small thing was that had just bumped into her. The bright red curls and zipper gave it away. "Scraps!" Sarah announced happily, smiling at the small woman. "Why are you in such a rush?" she asked. It was then she caught the terrified expression and frowned. "Is everything okay?" she asked gently.

[scraps_molly]

"Okay? No, everything isn't okay. I kissed Glitch. *I* Kissed Glitch. I kissed GLITCH. I hugged him and kissed him... and he kissed me back. It was supposed to be a happy kiss. It was happy." Scraps looked at Sarah with wide silver eyes

[rebelyell_sarah]

Scraps' abrupt admission of what was causing her to run caught her off guard and caused her eyes to widen slightly. "Oh," she replied lamely, already struggling to keep up with the fast paced speech

[scraps_molly]

"I do like him." Scraps said in a small voice." She let her forefinger trace the pattern of the woodgrain on the table

[rebelyell_sarah]

Her eyes lowered to the hand that was tracing the table as she spoke. Scraps had a lot to say about Glitch, about their relationship. To Sarah it seemed simple, black and white as things so often were for her. Being a couple was the next natural step. But she was sure that if she had been in Scraps' situation, her mind would have been running just as rampantly. Funny, how that worked

[scraps_molly]

"I've danced with Glitch. I sometimes think we're dancing without our feet moving. I just don't know what to do when the dancing ends."

Scraps looked up and smiled a tentative smile at Sarah. "No. Not all men are bad. I'm learning. Most aren't. Though many are afraid of the bad and don't stand up."

Molly sighed and sat with her elbows on the table her hands on either side of her face, holding her head up.

"I want to dance. I want to glide. I want to fly like people say you can fly, without the trapeze or nets. Sometimes I feel I want to much. And while I want, I'm afraid all the same. Of falling. Of being broken. Of breaking someone I fall on."

She sighed. "Maybe Glitch won't even remember I kissed him and we can just be as we were. Static, unchanging, but close to happy."

[rebelyell_sarah]

Sitting quietly, Sarah let Scraps speak without interruption, knowing it was best to let her sort things out in her head. Sometimes a person to talk to was necessary when you already knew the answer, but were too afraid to take that first step. Scraps knew what to do, she just needed to feel like she had help deciding.

"You don't want to be what I am," she mumbled with a frown. "Close to happy is nothing like being happy. Don't let the feelings fool you. And don't let the fear keep you away."

[scraps_molly]

"Like you are?" Scraps looked up to Sarah. "You're nice. You say what you mean most of the time. Your colors are pretty, as well. You have a lot of purple, but a little too much blue with a hint of green."

Scraps twirled an overly orange-red curl around her finger. "Know what I think? I thing the two of us are a lot alike to a point. Bad things happened early in life. And maybe middling. I took to being a mouse so no-one saw me as I skittered around. Hiding, nibbling, surviving day to day. I still do that sometimes. I'm scared of a lot. Including this whole kissing thing."

Silver eyes rested on Sarah again. "But when I was safe I still stayed the mouse. People scare me. I climb bodyguards at the sight of a rat. I only knew how to be a mouse. I'm learning to be a woman, and I'm much more open then I was."

"YOU got brave. You went after what you wanted, even if you were a bit scared. Where I was afraid, you had compassion. And I think there might just be someone who likes you. If you'll let them."

[rebelyell_sarah]

"Sometimes I only pretend to be happy," she explained. "Pretending isn't as fun as it was when I was little," her small connection causing her to smile weakly.

"I hide. I'm scared. I haven't done most of what I want to do yet, like move out, or try for the Royal Guard. I'm so alone. I've always been alone-well, almost. Only not in the big bad world," she laughed. "I don't know what I'm doing," she explained.

"So really, don't give me too much credit," Sarah chuckled and gave a quick wink. "Oh?" her head tipped. "Who do you think likes me?" the question was posed causally, as if she didn't really care, but she was actually quite curious.

[scraps_molly]

"Hardly anyone knows what they're doing, really." Scraps nodded sagely. Then looked confused. "I think, anyways."

"But you started. You took steps. You asked about the guard. You're moving towards it." Scraps pointed out. "You may live in the palace. But it's like a city sometimes. You have employment and your own income. You live in and keep your own room. You have taken steps." Scraps leaned in a bit and whispered, "I sometimes still sleep in a nest in the lab. My room near so many people sometimes makes me afraid."

Then Scraps straightened up. "But I've seen someone mostly brown and yellow get shot through with all bright pink and light when you're near. Colors rarely lie. Someone really likes you. But I can't say who. That would be unfair."

[rebelyell_sarah]

Sarah had to give a soft, perhaps bitter laugh at Scraps' thought. Wouldn't that be a shame, if no one knew what they were doing? What sad, lost souls they would all be. Just trying to cling to whatever sense of normalcy they could find. Even worse, it was likely true

[scraps_molly]

Scraps offered a small smile.

She was not aware that she had gone from being in need to being what she needed to be. She slid so easily between her parts sometimes. It wasn't exactly like she was different people, her core.... Scrappiness, remained. But her brain sometimes pulled things from different areas, memories, thought patterns.

"Light pink shot through with white, when near someone in particular, in my remembering, usually means attraction in a romantic sense. It means loving attraction with um.... sexy undertones."

Not that she'd ever been the one such things were felt for. But she'd seen new couples and just people attracted to one another enough to recognize the color.

Clear bright red when two involved people were near meant all hot sex and passion. DG and the man of tin got tinged with clear red a lot. So did Az and Jeb. There were actually quite a few couples around here that did. It often made her want to close her eyes.

[rebelyell_sarah]

"Hmph," Sarah said in reply, her tone defeated. Scraps had blatantly disproved everything she had been thinking. There was no choice but to accept that someone liked her. It caused a heavy sigh to emerge; that was a scary thought. Some liked her. And sexy undertones? She wasn't sure she was ready for, or even wanted that.

Forcing her mind from the thought, she let it wander to Scraps' understanding of color and people. "How do you know what the colors mean?" she tipped her head. She knew it probably had to do with the many parts she consisted of, but still, Sarah was unaware of anything else like it. "You tell me I have all these colors... and too much of some, are they bad colors? Good colors?" she laughed. "Sorry, I don't mean to bombard you. That's not why we're here anyway. You kissed Glitch," she reminded herself and Scraps.

[scraps_molly]

“I could see colors… for a long time. Not all the time. Half of a half of the time. It’s one of my parts. I know some of the meaning from observing, and some I just… know

[rebelyell_sarah]

"I figured it had to do with your parts," Sarah confessed. "It's a pretty cool part," she grinned. "A gift really, being able to see people's colors. It's not something most people can do."

Green. It wasn't a bad color. Not her favorite, but it was pretty. Natural. Should she judge her own colors that way, by whether she liked them or not? Probably not, it seemed a lot like judging oneself. And that was never good. Growth and change? That seemed right, too. She was always trying to change things for herself. The other colors were right too, but she was glad green was the main one. Blue or yellow as the main colors would've been bad.

"Kissing?" she chuckled. Sometimes Sarah felt like Scraps did, needing to know how things worked. Kissing was such a simple gesture, but it meant so much sometimes. "Last time I heard, it's a pretty big deal for such a small thing. And kissing's not the only thing like that," she sighed.

"Humans are so complicated, Scraps."