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[outboxed]

5 acts meme rules
+ Post a list of your five favorite acts/kinks to read about. Check out this list if you need some inspiration. At the bottom of your post, add what fandoms/pairings you're interested in.
+ Read other people's lists; the master list of lists is here.
+ Post comment-fic based off of other people's interests.

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[linndechir]

“Come on, you're falling asleep, kiddo,” John mumbles into his hair, that low, rumbling voice that makes Dean's heart race and still reassures him more than anything else in this world. “Go back to bed.”

Dean shakes his head stubbornly and holds on to John. It wouldn't be the first time that John would just fall asleep on a chair, and who knows how often he's already done that in the two weeks that he's been gone. And although Dean would never dream of saying it, John is definitely getting too old to sleep on chairs.

“Only if you go, too.” John laughs softly and tightens his arms around Dean for a moment, and Dean is grateful that John isn't in such a bad mood that he'd get angry at Dean for not obeying him right away. They both lean on each other on their way to the bedroom. It only has two beds; John had booked the room for Dean and Sam before he left, there had been no need for a third bed. Sammy is still sleeping, always a heavy sleeper unlike Dean, because he knows that someone is always there to keep him safe. And it's not just because Sammy always complains that he's too old to share a bed with Dean that Dean stumbles into bed with John instead. He had never been too proud for that, had never seen a reason why any of them should ever have to be alone when they have each other.

He's relieved that John doesn't object and just pulls Dean against his chest. John is still dressed, and he probably could have used a shower before going to bed, but Dean doesn't mind. He presses his face against John's chest, breathes in his smell, squirms a little to get his hands under John's shirt and hold on to him. Dad's home, and safe, and Sammy is snoring quietly in the other bed.

His last thought before he falls asleep is that as long as he has this, he'll be just fine.

[outboxed]

OH MY GOD. EEEE. OH MY GOD. YOU WROTE ME JOHN/DEAN AND IT IS SO ADORABLE AND AMAZING AND OH GOD THE LOVE AND THE DEVOTION. This is amazing. The moment you said you were writing me something I was super excited to see what it would be and this is just- this is just so gorgeous and it's the only thing I ever wanted, Linn.

This is immaculate and beautiful, from the title and epigraph from Richard Siken down the the utterly heartwrenching (given our powers of hindsight) last line - because, sure, "as long as he has this, he'll be just fine" but he can't have it forever and, oh god, things are going to get bad for him after John's not there anymore. Noo. ;______;

And, just- this whole thing, Linn. Dean as an awkward fifteen-year-old who nevertheless is completely devoted to looking out for his dad (because he's not Sammy, he isn't going to pick anything over his family) and him getting up EVERY TIME John comes home from a hunt and cleaning his wounds and just yesss. And John is totally receptive to Dean's need to be close to him and be good to him and shows affection because he isn't an asshole and he never was - he knows how to give his boys what they need to be happy, as well as what they need to survive. And I love that the one point where he's a little short with Dean is when Dean says John should've let him go on the hunt. YES. PERFECT. YES. Because John looks after his boys and Dean wants to look after John right back. Ugh. Yessss.

And yes to all the appropriate touching that Dean wishes was a bit more inappropriate. Hey, Dean, maybe you'll get your wish someday but, for now, your life is pretty awesome and you don't have any "Sammy ran away to college angst" to deal with and, until then, you can probably wait, and it's not like it won't be worth the waiting. (;

And all the stuff about how John smells of sweat and leather and the blood of whatever thing he killed this time, but for Dean he just smells like Dad is just perfect and how he should've showered but Dean doesn't mind because OF COURSE HE DOESN'T. The smell of John is probably just another reminder that he's home and safe and yesss.

... this comment is probably insane and incoherent but I just want to stop writing it so that I can read the whole thing through over again, okay? YOU WROTE ME JOHN/DEAN, LINN, I AM SO HAPPY. HOW DID I MANAGE TO MEET SUCH AN AMAZING PERSON WHO SHIPS THIS PERFECT SHIP AND WROTE IT FOR ME? HOW? WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS? ♥

[linndechir]

I'M SO HAPPY YOU LIKE THIS. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'D DO WITHOUT YOU BECAUSE NOBODY ELSE UNDERSTANDS MY LOVE FOR JOHN/DEAN.

I don't know why I wrote that last line. :( I mean, John/Dean is such a HAPPY ship for me while John is alive and it just kills me that Dean loses John because I don't think anyone else ever made Dean so happy. IT'S WHY I NEED JOHN TO COME BACK TO LIFE AND BE WITH DEAN AGAIN OKAY?

I think the reason I love this ship so much, and I wrote this stupidly long meta post about that once, is that they rely on each other, they both just need each other and it's a far less one-sided relationship than most people seem to think.

Heh, tbh I can never quite decide when exactly John and Dean actually started sleeping with each other in my headcanon, so it was probably a good thing this was all UST. Because you bet that Dean started thinking about it as soon as he started thinking about sex in any way.

YOU DESERVE THIS BECAUSE YOU ARE PERFECT AND ALWAYS WRITE PERFECT THINGS FOR ME, SO THE LEAST I CAN DO IS TO RETURN THE FAVOUR EVERY NOW AND THEN, ESPECIALLY WHEN IT'S SUCH A PERFECT AMAZING WONDERFUL SHIP THAT ALMOST NOBODY ELSE SHIPS. I am so stupidly happy that you liked this. <3333 You're the best.

[outboxed]

I AM JUST SO HAPPY YOU WROTE IT. WHY ARE THERE NOT MORE JOHN/DEAN SHIPPERS OUT THERE? I WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND BUT I AM SO GLAD THAT I FOUND YOU TO MAKE UP FOR THE LACK OF OTHER SHIPPERS.

It's a cruel last line for sure but maybe you were just playing up to my need to have my heart torn to shreds by my ships? Who knows. And, yesss, JOHN HAS TO COME BACK TO LIFE AND BE THERE FOR DEAN AGAIN BECAUSE IT IS JUST NOT OKAY THAT HE DOESN'T HAVE SOMEONE TO MAKE HIM HAPPY LIKE THAT ANYMORE.

They are deliciously co-dependent and also a beautifully functioning unit and they give each other so much.

Yeah, when the start sleeping together is definitely an open question. Because you know Dean wanted to, for sure, but I think John probably took some convincing.

YOU ARE SERIOUSLY THE BEST, LINN. THIS IS SO PERFECT, SERIOUSLY, AND I AM SO GLAD WE CAN WRITE FOR EACH OTHER AND SHIP SHIPS TOGETHER, ESPECIALLY FLAWLESS AND RARE SHIPS LIKE THIS. <3 I am so stupidly happy you wrote this. Never stop being my co-shipper in arms.

[linndechir]

IT'S LIKE WE WERE MADE FOR EACH OTHER TO SHIP ALL OUR RARE SHIPS TOGETHER. :D

I guess that was it. I wrote it and thought, "oh no, this is far too happy, HERE HAVE SOME MISERY, ALL THEIR HAPPINESS WILL BE DESTROOOOYYYYYYYYYYYED!!!" Yep, I just want all the "John comes back to life and he and Dean are happy again" fic. And all the fic about the four years they spent together while Sam was off being normal.

I think it helps that John started seeing Dean as a grown-up fairly early, so I can well see it happening before Dean was 18 (because, really, if you're going to sleep with your son, I don't think the big deal is whether he's legal or not ;)), but probably not THAT much before. And Dean probably wouldn't have tried anything much earlier because it would have taken him ages to gather the courage to do anything about his hardcore crush on John. ;) So I usually assume that Dean was 16-17 or something like that.

I WILL NEVER STOP, DON'T WORRY. :DDDD