lies, damn lies, and statistics
Lies, Damn lies, and Statistics | Kyuhyun, Ryeowook
PG-13 | Mild Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Character death.
They were in third grade when Ryeowook first caught Kyuhyun lying.
They were young and foolish, and this other boy never stopped boasting about his cool pencil case. Kyuhyun never spared him any attention, and Ryeowook didn’t too because Kyuhyun didn’t care.
It was during break when everyone’s off to play out on the swings and slides and sandbox when Kyuhyun went back inside the room, went to the cool pencil case perched on a desk and hid it under his school shirt. He went to the gym locker rooms just behind the kindergarten and threw the pencil case in the trash bin.
Kyuhyun passed by a stunned Ryeowook, not even caring that he’s caught. “Kyuhyunnie, why did you do that to Youngwoon’s pencil case?” Little chubby Ryeowook asked and Kyuhyun smiled at him. “That was mine. My mom bought it from the market yesterday.” Kyuhyun told him before walking off.
Ryeowook didn’t believe him, but he followed Kyuhyun still. Because where Kyuhyun goes, Ryeowook follows.
--
Kyuhyun is a genius, and they were still kids. Geniuses look cool in other kid’s eyes, so Kyuhyun made a lot of friends on the first day of middle school. He was about to go to Ryeowook’s class for lunch when his new friends asked him to join them, and Kyuhyun felt bad as he watched Ryeowook eating alone on one of the tables in the cafeteria.
“Kyuhyun! Let’s go home together.” Jungsoo, the smiley kid in his class asked and the few others with him nodded wanting him to come along too. Kyuhyun smiled and shook his head. “My mom will be fetching me, I live far.” He told them and watched the boys back as they laughed at something someone said.
Kyuhyun turned around and spotted Ryeowook standing ways behind him and smiled. “Let’s go home?” He asked and Ryeowook smiled back.
They walked together in silence, the two blocks to Kyuhyun’s house just across Ryeowook’s.
--
“Kyuhyun, oppa… I-I like you.” One of those pretty girls cornered him in his locker just as he was about to go home. Same old, same old. He thought. He bowed politely and bit the insides of his cheeks “I’m sorry I can’t return your feelings.” He told her before stalking off to the gates where Ryeowook stood.
“Why?” She asked, following his brisk steps and he stopped just to look her levelly in the eyes.
“I already have someone.” Kyuhyun told her in a soft but cold voice as he started walking away again.
She cried soundlessly staring at Kyuhyun’s back, and the last thing she saw was Kyuhyun waving a lazy hand towards where a thin, petit man stood.
--
“Why do you lie?” Ryeowook asked him, not for the first time as they walked home, hand in hand from work.
Kyuhyun smiled and just shrugged.
“The world won’t be a better place to live in even in your lies and fantasies.” Ryeowook mumbles and Kyuhyun presses him on the wall of the alley they just passed.
“My life is never something to live for, why should I care about the world?” He whispered harshly before he pressed his lips on Ryeowook’s. Firm and unrelenting as always even when Ryeowook never did respond.
--
Kyuhyun lives in his lies and his fantasies, Ryeowook knew that, and he is the only one who anchors Kyuhyun back to reality, he’s also aware.
“I’ll buy a beach house when I’m richer. You’d like that won’t you? We can swim all day if you want. We’ll live there, you and I, until we’re old and wrinkly, we can buy a dog.” Kyuhyun said smiling as he sat on the counter watching as Ryeowook cooked.
“That’s not what I want.” Ryeowook told him softly, not looking at him.
“Then we can buy a cat if you want.” The other shrugged. The smile permanent on his lips.
“I don’t want to live in that house with you.” Ryeowook looked back as he said it and the stupid smile on Kyuhyun’s lips was mocking him.
“Ah, then we can live on the country side. Just you and I.” Kyuhyun continued, and Ryeowook felt nausea bubbling in him as he listened to Kyuhyun’s ramblings of forever and just you and I.
--
First there’s hurt, then betrayal, anger, rage. Kyuhyun strode the room with three huge steps and yanked Ryeowook away from the stranger Kyuhyun caught him lip locked with.
“Kyuhyun, what are you doing?” Ryeowook whispers harshly as he tried to yank his arm from Kyuhyun’s tight grip.
“We’re going home, Ryeowook. You’ve had your fun. Now tell this stranger thank you and you’ll never see each other again.” Kyuhyun smiled at him, and Ryeowook covered his lips with trembling hands to fight the nauseous feeling he always get whenever he sees that smile.
“K-Kyuhyun, he’s not a stranger. I’ve introduced him to you a lot of times already. He’s my boyfriend, and I’m not going home with you.” He got out of Kyuhyun’s grip and walked towards where his boyfriend stood, pulling the other away, towards the door.
“You can’t leave me, Ryeowook. You can’t.” Kyuhyun shouted and Ryeowook spared him a glance when he whispered, “I’m going to die. You can’t leave me.”
“What? You’re going to tell me you’d kill yourself? I’m sick of you and your lies Kyuhyun.” Ryeowook’s eyes turned from hard to bitter in seconds as he watched his old friend. “We were never together, Kyuhyun. You were so caught up in your lies to see that.”
Kyuhyun just stared, tuning out most of Ryeowook’s words and registering just some. “Yes, I’m going to kill myself if you leave me, Ryeowook. I’m going to kill myself and it will be your fault.”
--
“You and your lies, Kyuhyun.” Ryeowook said, trembling as nausea started to bubble up in his stomach again.
“You and your lies.” He whispered, staring at Kyuhyun’s smiling face, the smile mocking him still, even on a pale, lifeless lips.
--
The rules are simple: they lie to us, we know they're lying,
they know we know they're lying, but they keep lying to us,
and we keep pretending to believe them.”
― Elena Gorokhova, A Mountain of Crumbs: A Memoir
PG-13 | Mild Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Character death.
They were in third grade when Ryeowook first caught Kyuhyun lying.
They were young and foolish, and this other boy never stopped boasting about his cool pencil case. Kyuhyun never spared him any attention, and Ryeowook didn’t too because Kyuhyun didn’t care.
It was during break when everyone’s off to play out on the swings and slides and sandbox when Kyuhyun went back inside the room, went to the cool pencil case perched on a desk and hid it under his school shirt. He went to the gym locker rooms just behind the kindergarten and threw the pencil case in the trash bin.
Kyuhyun passed by a stunned Ryeowook, not even caring that he’s caught. “Kyuhyunnie, why did you do that to Youngwoon’s pencil case?” Little chubby Ryeowook asked and Kyuhyun smiled at him. “That was mine. My mom bought it from the market yesterday.” Kyuhyun told him before walking off.
Ryeowook didn’t believe him, but he followed Kyuhyun still. Because where Kyuhyun goes, Ryeowook follows.
--
Kyuhyun is a genius, and they were still kids. Geniuses look cool in other kid’s eyes, so Kyuhyun made a lot of friends on the first day of middle school. He was about to go to Ryeowook’s class for lunch when his new friends asked him to join them, and Kyuhyun felt bad as he watched Ryeowook eating alone on one of the tables in the cafeteria.
“Kyuhyun! Let’s go home together.” Jungsoo, the smiley kid in his class asked and the few others with him nodded wanting him to come along too. Kyuhyun smiled and shook his head. “My mom will be fetching me, I live far.” He told them and watched the boys back as they laughed at something someone said.
Kyuhyun turned around and spotted Ryeowook standing ways behind him and smiled. “Let’s go home?” He asked and Ryeowook smiled back.
They walked together in silence, the two blocks to Kyuhyun’s house just across Ryeowook’s.
--
“Kyuhyun, oppa… I-I like you.” One of those pretty girls cornered him in his locker just as he was about to go home. Same old, same old. He thought. He bowed politely and bit the insides of his cheeks “I’m sorry I can’t return your feelings.” He told her before stalking off to the gates where Ryeowook stood.
“Why?” She asked, following his brisk steps and he stopped just to look her levelly in the eyes.
“I already have someone.” Kyuhyun told her in a soft but cold voice as he started walking away again.
She cried soundlessly staring at Kyuhyun’s back, and the last thing she saw was Kyuhyun waving a lazy hand towards where a thin, petit man stood.
--
“Why do you lie?” Ryeowook asked him, not for the first time as they walked home, hand in hand from work.
Kyuhyun smiled and just shrugged.
“The world won’t be a better place to live in even in your lies and fantasies.” Ryeowook mumbles and Kyuhyun presses him on the wall of the alley they just passed.
“My life is never something to live for, why should I care about the world?” He whispered harshly before he pressed his lips on Ryeowook’s. Firm and unrelenting as always even when Ryeowook never did respond.
--
Kyuhyun lives in his lies and his fantasies, Ryeowook knew that, and he is the only one who anchors Kyuhyun back to reality, he’s also aware.
“I’ll buy a beach house when I’m richer. You’d like that won’t you? We can swim all day if you want. We’ll live there, you and I, until we’re old and wrinkly, we can buy a dog.” Kyuhyun said smiling as he sat on the counter watching as Ryeowook cooked.
“That’s not what I want.” Ryeowook told him softly, not looking at him.
“Then we can buy a cat if you want.” The other shrugged. The smile permanent on his lips.
“I don’t want to live in that house with you.” Ryeowook looked back as he said it and the stupid smile on Kyuhyun’s lips was mocking him.
“Ah, then we can live on the country side. Just you and I.” Kyuhyun continued, and Ryeowook felt nausea bubbling in him as he listened to Kyuhyun’s ramblings of forever and just you and I.
--
First there’s hurt, then betrayal, anger, rage. Kyuhyun strode the room with three huge steps and yanked Ryeowook away from the stranger Kyuhyun caught him lip locked with.
“Kyuhyun, what are you doing?” Ryeowook whispers harshly as he tried to yank his arm from Kyuhyun’s tight grip.
“We’re going home, Ryeowook. You’ve had your fun. Now tell this stranger thank you and you’ll never see each other again.” Kyuhyun smiled at him, and Ryeowook covered his lips with trembling hands to fight the nauseous feeling he always get whenever he sees that smile.
“K-Kyuhyun, he’s not a stranger. I’ve introduced him to you a lot of times already. He’s my boyfriend, and I’m not going home with you.” He got out of Kyuhyun’s grip and walked towards where his boyfriend stood, pulling the other away, towards the door.
“You can’t leave me, Ryeowook. You can’t.” Kyuhyun shouted and Ryeowook spared him a glance when he whispered, “I’m going to die. You can’t leave me.”
“What? You’re going to tell me you’d kill yourself? I’m sick of you and your lies Kyuhyun.” Ryeowook’s eyes turned from hard to bitter in seconds as he watched his old friend. “We were never together, Kyuhyun. You were so caught up in your lies to see that.”
Kyuhyun just stared, tuning out most of Ryeowook’s words and registering just some. “Yes, I’m going to kill myself if you leave me, Ryeowook. I’m going to kill myself and it will be your fault.”
--
“You and your lies, Kyuhyun.” Ryeowook said, trembling as nausea started to bubble up in his stomach again.
“You and your lies.” He whispered, staring at Kyuhyun’s smiling face, the smile mocking him still, even on a pale, lifeless lips.
--
The rules are simple: they lie to us, we know they're lying,
they know we know they're lying, but they keep lying to us,
and we keep pretending to believe them.”
― Elena Gorokhova, A Mountain of Crumbs: A Memoir