(no subject)
Just got back from the movies. I have no idea what I just saw, but it sure as hell wasn't "Prince Caspian." After all, the only characters I seemed to recognize were Edmund, Lucy, and maybe Reepicheep. Oh. And Pattertwig had an unnamed cameo. Anyways...
Ten Things I Liked
1. Edmund (and his torch/flashlight) were ten shades of awesome. They even kept his part in where he defends Lucy when she says she sees Aslan. :D (He also does a couple other things that I'll mention later.)
2. Miraz's wife, Prunaprismia, had an interesting new part.
3. There was a cute kid centaur who was in the honor guard.
4. Nikabrik, the Hag, and the werewolf actually almost summoned the White Witch instead of just talking about it. (How they got her wand back together was a whole 'nother story.
5. CGI Reepicheep was a big improvement over BBC costumed-midget Reepicheep.
6. King Miraz's cape was extremely swooshy.
7. The dwarves and centaurs did this cool thing in the final battle where they hollowed out the ground and broke these pillars, making the battlefield collapse under the weight of the Telmarines.
8. Caspian and Peter had this minisword fight in the woods before they realized that they were on the same side.
9. Did I mention Edmund was awesome?
10. The directors/writers/producers actually had the GALL to change almost everything.
Ten Things I Disliked Hated Needed to Die
1. Prince Caspian changed from a 13 year-old kid, to a 18 year-old Antonio Banderas look alike. Not surprisingly, this only served to make him more incompetent.
2. The aforementioned change was not, as my friend and I suspected, to increase fangirls, but to set him up for a forbidden love romance with Susan Pevensie. DX
3. Both Peter and Caspian were transformed into major dorkwads with enough ego to cover the whole of Narnia. In the very beginning of the movie, we're introduced to Peter as he's fighting this other kid for trying to make Peter apologize when the other kid bumped into him.
4. Caspian blew the horn, not as a last resort, but at first panic, thus drastically changing the course of events for almost the ENTIRE movie. This caused Peter and Caspian to meet before anyone even reached Aslan's How, thereby creating much angst and tension between the two as they both tried to rule.
5. The whole discovery of Cair Paravel, and the slow realization that hundreds of years had passed since the four were in Narnia was quickly scrunched together in order to make room for a new, Hollywood-polished middle section.
6. FIREWORKS. There were fireworks... in Narnia. They also apparently knew enough about gunpower to get the different shapes and colors, and yet there were no explosives or guns. D:
7. Miraz had a lot of scenes to himself, but it only served to show how evil he really was. Everything in the Telmarine culture was gray and pointed as well... up until the point where Narnia won, and suddenly all the houses turned brown and cheerful. o_O
8. Doctor Cornelius's awesomeness was diminished. He hinted to Caspian that his uncle was responsible for his father's death in the middle of an invasion. So, instead of running to the gatehouse to help raise the porticullis, Caspian runs to his uncle's bedchamber, thus botching up the whole invasion plan, causing half of his troops to die. Then Caspian blames it on Peter for not knowing when to retreat and fight another day.
9. The talking animals and native Narnians needed a bigger part. Pattertwig and Wimbleweather were reduced to second long cameos. And I never got used to Reepicheep's voice (even if it was the flawless Eddie Izzard). They took out the Sir Didymus quality and added a fresh coating of sarcasm, which is normally very nice... but it's not Reepicheep.
10. Aside from Beruna (whose town has disappeared) and the Rush, all geography in Narnia is non-existant in the movie now. Soldiers can get from Miraz's castle to Cair Paravel in a day. Miraz travels back and forth from Beruna to his castle daily. And either giant tunnels are common in Narnia, or the armies have extremely good endurance. Like really good endurance. Not just that, but Susan and Lucy change into completely unpractical gown when they get back to Narnia. I suppose it's for the high fantasy feel, but since they're supposed to be traveling halfway across the country, you'd think they'd go for something a little more practical/armored. Luckily they're in movie!Narnia, where their dresses don't get torn and they can magically get to Aslan's How in two days. :D
The movie starts out with Miraz's son being born. He's still Lord Miraz, but that doesn't stop him from sending twenty crossbow-armed guards into Caspian's room to kill him. Luckily, Cornelius had gotten him out just minutes before. Cornelius gives Caspian Susan's horn and tells him only to use it in his greatest need. He rushes off, chased by guards, as fireworks announce the birth of Miraz's son. Yes... fireworks. Anyways, Caspian makes it into the woods before the guards can get him, and a few hesitate, giving him the perfect opportunity to get ahead and hide. Right? Wrong. The opening credits haven't ended yet, so he has to ride through the forest, out the other end back into the open, across a stream/river (by which point the guards have caught up), and back into another forest. The credits end and he finally gets knocked out by a tree branch.
The guards are still coming when Nikabrik and Trumpkin the dwarf come out of hiding to see what the fuss is. They want to kill him, until they see Susan's horn. Trumpkin runs off to distract the guards and gets captured, while Nikabrik approaches Caspian. Caspian panics... and blows the horn.
Cut to London where a car honks at Lucy for running across the street. She dashes across anyways and finds Susan, who is being hit on by a dorky Hufflepuff. Lucy says to come quick and they both rush off. The reason? Peter is fighting with some other boys again. Edmund sees his brother getting beat up and joins in. Later, Peter says he didn't start it. The other boy did when he bumped into Peter and demanded that Peter apologize. Great to see that all of Aslan's lessons haven't gone to waste, Peter. Anyways, they're in a crowded station, and then the CGI takes effect and they're in Narnia.
The next ten minutes follow the book, except for the Pevensies are only on Cair Paravel for a few hours. This is strange, seeing as how minutes before, Trumpkin was being interrogated in Miraz's castle. Great are the powers of Narnian teleportation.
So yeah. Meanwhile, Caspian meets Trufflehunter and Nikabrik. The Pevensies save Trumpkin from his watery fate. They start heading west. Caspian starts walking in the woods with T&R. Telmarine soldiers start attacking. Reepicheep saves them and says his first sarcastic line in the movie. They meet the centaurs. The Pevensies get to the Rush, Lucy sees Aslan, only Edmund believes her. They decide to go to Beruna instead where it's less steep. Miraz gets a point of view where he imprisons Cornelius. The Pevensies get to Beruna, only to find that lots of Telmarines are building catapults and a bridge, despite the rebels not being stationed anywhere yet. They go back. Lucy stands in the exact spot where she saw Aslan, and she falls through a small hole onto a small path that leads right down into the gorge, thus cutting out the appearances of Aslan until the very end of the movie. Miraz questions the captain of the men that got attacked by Reepicheep. Miraz declares Caspian the leader of the rebels.
Lucy has a really quick dream about Aslan. When she wakes up, she wants to see him again, and almost runs right smack into a minotaur. Peter warns her to get down before he gets attacked by Caspian, both thinking that the other is Telmarine. Then Susan and Trumpkin come and break it up. They travel to Aslan's How, not knowing it's Aslan's How until Caspian shows them the great stone table in its bowels. The two contemplate on how well they'd be able to stand a siege. Pattertwig offers to get nuts. Reepicheep says, "Great! We can throw them at the Telmarines!" Then he smacks Pattertwig on the head.
Peter says with Miraz's forces at Beruna, they can launch a surprise attack on Miraz's castle. The only flaw with this is that everyone in Narnia can teleport, thus making a surprise attack pointless. Caspian is hesitant, but reluctantly agrees. At this point I've given up on trying to follow along with the book plot in my head. Edmund is dropped off on a tower by a gryphon at night, and proceeds to make signals with his flashlight for the rest of the group. Peter, Susan, and Caspian are dropped off outside of Cornelius' window, but Cornelius is nowhere to be found. Peter and Susan say they can take Miraz, but Caspian has to go open the portcullis for the rest of the troops waiting outside. Caspian says he can find Cornelius and still have enough time. Meanwhile, Reepicheep enters with his crew and Trumpkin, ready to lower the drawbridge on the signal.
Caspian goes straight to the dungeons and finds Cornelius. Cornelius, being the Hollywood husk of his former self, hints to Caspian that Miraz might have been the one to kill his father. Caspian immediately forgets the portcullis and rushes up to Miraz's room. He draws the sword on him while Miraz's in bed. He demands to know the truth of what happened, allowing time for Miraz's wife to get a hold of a crossbow and point it at Caspian. Peter and Susan burst in, sword and bow raised, and Peter demands to know why Caspian's not down at the portcullis. I forget what Caspian says, it's extremely lame. Miraz's wife panics and shoots off her crossbow, Susan shoots of her's, and everyone ducks. Miraz gets away and sounds off the alarm.
Meanwhile, Edmund has grown bored of the plot being radically different, and is now tossing his flashlight, turned off, from hand to hand. He drops it, and it's picked up by another guard one story below. Edmund creeps down, attacks the guard, eventually losing his sword. He bashes the guard unconscious with the flashlight though, and everything's okay... 'cept for they're still waiting on the portcullis to get raised, and Edmund can't get the flashlight to work now.
Caspian suggests that they call it quits as they race across the yard, but Peter says they've gone to far. They raise the portcullis, Trumpkin and the mice lower the drawbridge, and Edmund finally gets his flashlight to work. The Narnians rush into a slaughterhouse. Eventually they decide to retreat, but one of Miraz's men cut the rope for the portcullis. One minotaur had the sense to hold it up, but no one else had the sense to help him. So the portcullis comes crashing down with only half of their troops making it through. Edmund is cornered in his tower, but uses his flashlight as a bar to keep the door from opening for a few seconds. He is saved by his gryphon.
Back at Aslan's How, Caspian blames Peter for the disaster, and Peter blames Caspian. Caspian goes down in the basement to angst. Nikabrik seizes hold of this and introduces Caspian to the hag and the werewolf. They've found Jadis's wand somehow, even though Edmund broke it, and use it to summon up an ice portal. Jadis appears behind it and reaches her hand through the ice, saying she only needs the blood of Adam to be restored. She says she'll grant him all the power he needs to take back his throne. Peter and Edmund burst in and fight the evil three. Peter breaks through and stops Caspian before it's too late, but he himself starts to get tempted. He's about to succumb when suddenly the ice wall shatters. Edmund had snuck up from behind and stabbed Jadis in the back. My inner Edmund fangirl was very happy with that.
Anyways, the three makeup. They agree that the only way to win is to find Aslan. Meanwhile, Miraz crowns himself king, gets a swishy cloak, finishes the bridge across Beruna, and gets his army on the edge of the field around Aslan's How. Lucy agrees to go find Aslan, and Susan says she'll come with her. The Pevensie boys finally decide to get the movie back on track by giving Edmund the letter to give to Miraz about challenging Peter. They use this to keep the attention off of Susan and Lucy as the prepare to escape. Susan and Caspian flirt a bit before they're off. Miraz agrees to the challenge and the battle between Peter and Miraz begins.
Lucy and Susan are still attack though, and Susan leaps off, sending Lucy on alone. Susan manages to kill all of their pursuers with her bow except one. Then Caspian jumps out of nowhere and saves her. They ride back to Aslan's How together. The battle between Peter and Miraz continues. Caspian and Susan return and P&M take a break. They go back into the ring after a brief pep talk and Peter wins. Miraz says to just kill him, but Peter says that that decision belongs to Caspian. Caspian refuses as well, and Miraz start to limp back to his own men. One of his generals sticks and arrow in him though and claims it was the Narnians. The final battle begins.
Meanwhile. Lucy meets Aslan. He roars and the trees come to life. Back in the final battle, the Narnians do the cool thing where they make the ground collapse underneath the weight of the Telmarines, but there are just too many. Caspian's about to get killed when a giant tree root saves him. The trees start attacking and the Telmarines retreat. They run back through the plains and into the forest. In the next scene at the river, they're still running. Even though there's a mountain in the direction where they were running from. Magic tunnels, I swear. Anyways, they get to the river and the bridge with the Narnians coming through the magic tunnel right behind them. Across the bridge is Lucy and Aslan. They snicker and charge across... until Aslan roars. Suddenly, the river god comes out of nowhere and bashes their army to shreds.
Everybody cheers, Reepicheep discovers his tail is lost and gets it returned and everyone is happy. Even the colors of Miraz's town/castle get a face lift! :D
The next morning, Peter and Susan are looking downcast as they talk with Aslan. Caspian calls out to them, but they have to go to the town square. A gap in a tree's roots is turned into the magical gateway, and from there on out the movie pretty much ends the same way as the book... but with one big difference.
Caspian and Susan start making out after she says she'll never be coming back to Narnia.
Then the Pevensies walk through the portal home to the tune of a really bad pop/rock song. They all get on the train together, and Edmund laments the fact that his new torch/flashlight is still back in Narnia.
The End.
Ten Things I Liked
1. Edmund (and his torch/flashlight) were ten shades of awesome. They even kept his part in where he defends Lucy when she says she sees Aslan. :D (He also does a couple other things that I'll mention later.)
2. Miraz's wife, Prunaprismia, had an interesting new part.
3. There was a cute kid centaur who was in the honor guard.
4. Nikabrik, the Hag, and the werewolf actually almost summoned the White Witch instead of just talking about it. (How they got her wand back together was a whole 'nother story.
5. CGI Reepicheep was a big improvement over BBC costumed-midget Reepicheep.
6. King Miraz's cape was extremely swooshy.
7. The dwarves and centaurs did this cool thing in the final battle where they hollowed out the ground and broke these pillars, making the battlefield collapse under the weight of the Telmarines.
8. Caspian and Peter had this minisword fight in the woods before they realized that they were on the same side.
9. Did I mention Edmund was awesome?
10. The directors/writers/producers actually had the GALL to change almost everything.
Ten Things I Disliked Hated Needed to Die
1. Prince Caspian changed from a 13 year-old kid, to a 18 year-old Antonio Banderas look alike. Not surprisingly, this only served to make him more incompetent.
2. The aforementioned change was not, as my friend and I suspected, to increase fangirls, but to set him up for a forbidden love romance with Susan Pevensie. DX
3. Both Peter and Caspian were transformed into major dorkwads with enough ego to cover the whole of Narnia. In the very beginning of the movie, we're introduced to Peter as he's fighting this other kid for trying to make Peter apologize when the other kid bumped into him.
4. Caspian blew the horn, not as a last resort, but at first panic, thus drastically changing the course of events for almost the ENTIRE movie. This caused Peter and Caspian to meet before anyone even reached Aslan's How, thereby creating much angst and tension between the two as they both tried to rule.
5. The whole discovery of Cair Paravel, and the slow realization that hundreds of years had passed since the four were in Narnia was quickly scrunched together in order to make room for a new, Hollywood-polished middle section.
6. FIREWORKS. There were fireworks... in Narnia. They also apparently knew enough about gunpower to get the different shapes and colors, and yet there were no explosives or guns. D:
7. Miraz had a lot of scenes to himself, but it only served to show how evil he really was. Everything in the Telmarine culture was gray and pointed as well... up until the point where Narnia won, and suddenly all the houses turned brown and cheerful. o_O
8. Doctor Cornelius's awesomeness was diminished. He hinted to Caspian that his uncle was responsible for his father's death in the middle of an invasion. So, instead of running to the gatehouse to help raise the porticullis, Caspian runs to his uncle's bedchamber, thus botching up the whole invasion plan, causing half of his troops to die. Then Caspian blames it on Peter for not knowing when to retreat and fight another day.
9. The talking animals and native Narnians needed a bigger part. Pattertwig and Wimbleweather were reduced to second long cameos. And I never got used to Reepicheep's voice (even if it was the flawless Eddie Izzard). They took out the Sir Didymus quality and added a fresh coating of sarcasm, which is normally very nice... but it's not Reepicheep.
10. Aside from Beruna (whose town has disappeared) and the Rush, all geography in Narnia is non-existant in the movie now. Soldiers can get from Miraz's castle to Cair Paravel in a day. Miraz travels back and forth from Beruna to his castle daily. And either giant tunnels are common in Narnia, or the armies have extremely good endurance. Like really good endurance. Not just that, but Susan and Lucy change into completely unpractical gown when they get back to Narnia. I suppose it's for the high fantasy feel, but since they're supposed to be traveling halfway across the country, you'd think they'd go for something a little more practical/armored. Luckily they're in movie!Narnia, where their dresses don't get torn and they can magically get to Aslan's How in two days. :D
The movie starts out with Miraz's son being born. He's still Lord Miraz, but that doesn't stop him from sending twenty crossbow-armed guards into Caspian's room to kill him. Luckily, Cornelius had gotten him out just minutes before. Cornelius gives Caspian Susan's horn and tells him only to use it in his greatest need. He rushes off, chased by guards, as fireworks announce the birth of Miraz's son. Yes... fireworks. Anyways, Caspian makes it into the woods before the guards can get him, and a few hesitate, giving him the perfect opportunity to get ahead and hide. Right? Wrong. The opening credits haven't ended yet, so he has to ride through the forest, out the other end back into the open, across a stream/river (by which point the guards have caught up), and back into another forest. The credits end and he finally gets knocked out by a tree branch.
The guards are still coming when Nikabrik and Trumpkin the dwarf come out of hiding to see what the fuss is. They want to kill him, until they see Susan's horn. Trumpkin runs off to distract the guards and gets captured, while Nikabrik approaches Caspian. Caspian panics... and blows the horn.
Cut to London where a car honks at Lucy for running across the street. She dashes across anyways and finds Susan, who is being hit on by a dorky Hufflepuff. Lucy says to come quick and they both rush off. The reason? Peter is fighting with some other boys again. Edmund sees his brother getting beat up and joins in. Later, Peter says he didn't start it. The other boy did when he bumped into Peter and demanded that Peter apologize. Great to see that all of Aslan's lessons haven't gone to waste, Peter. Anyways, they're in a crowded station, and then the CGI takes effect and they're in Narnia.
The next ten minutes follow the book, except for the Pevensies are only on Cair Paravel for a few hours. This is strange, seeing as how minutes before, Trumpkin was being interrogated in Miraz's castle. Great are the powers of Narnian teleportation.
So yeah. Meanwhile, Caspian meets Trufflehunter and Nikabrik. The Pevensies save Trumpkin from his watery fate. They start heading west. Caspian starts walking in the woods with T&R. Telmarine soldiers start attacking. Reepicheep saves them and says his first sarcastic line in the movie. They meet the centaurs. The Pevensies get to the Rush, Lucy sees Aslan, only Edmund believes her. They decide to go to Beruna instead where it's less steep. Miraz gets a point of view where he imprisons Cornelius. The Pevensies get to Beruna, only to find that lots of Telmarines are building catapults and a bridge, despite the rebels not being stationed anywhere yet. They go back. Lucy stands in the exact spot where she saw Aslan, and she falls through a small hole onto a small path that leads right down into the gorge, thus cutting out the appearances of Aslan until the very end of the movie. Miraz questions the captain of the men that got attacked by Reepicheep. Miraz declares Caspian the leader of the rebels.
Lucy has a really quick dream about Aslan. When she wakes up, she wants to see him again, and almost runs right smack into a minotaur. Peter warns her to get down before he gets attacked by Caspian, both thinking that the other is Telmarine. Then Susan and Trumpkin come and break it up. They travel to Aslan's How, not knowing it's Aslan's How until Caspian shows them the great stone table in its bowels. The two contemplate on how well they'd be able to stand a siege. Pattertwig offers to get nuts. Reepicheep says, "Great! We can throw them at the Telmarines!" Then he smacks Pattertwig on the head.
Peter says with Miraz's forces at Beruna, they can launch a surprise attack on Miraz's castle. The only flaw with this is that everyone in Narnia can teleport, thus making a surprise attack pointless. Caspian is hesitant, but reluctantly agrees. At this point I've given up on trying to follow along with the book plot in my head. Edmund is dropped off on a tower by a gryphon at night, and proceeds to make signals with his flashlight for the rest of the group. Peter, Susan, and Caspian are dropped off outside of Cornelius' window, but Cornelius is nowhere to be found. Peter and Susan say they can take Miraz, but Caspian has to go open the portcullis for the rest of the troops waiting outside. Caspian says he can find Cornelius and still have enough time. Meanwhile, Reepicheep enters with his crew and Trumpkin, ready to lower the drawbridge on the signal.
Caspian goes straight to the dungeons and finds Cornelius. Cornelius, being the Hollywood husk of his former self, hints to Caspian that Miraz might have been the one to kill his father. Caspian immediately forgets the portcullis and rushes up to Miraz's room. He draws the sword on him while Miraz's in bed. He demands to know the truth of what happened, allowing time for Miraz's wife to get a hold of a crossbow and point it at Caspian. Peter and Susan burst in, sword and bow raised, and Peter demands to know why Caspian's not down at the portcullis. I forget what Caspian says, it's extremely lame. Miraz's wife panics and shoots off her crossbow, Susan shoots of her's, and everyone ducks. Miraz gets away and sounds off the alarm.
Meanwhile, Edmund has grown bored of the plot being radically different, and is now tossing his flashlight, turned off, from hand to hand. He drops it, and it's picked up by another guard one story below. Edmund creeps down, attacks the guard, eventually losing his sword. He bashes the guard unconscious with the flashlight though, and everything's okay... 'cept for they're still waiting on the portcullis to get raised, and Edmund can't get the flashlight to work now.
Caspian suggests that they call it quits as they race across the yard, but Peter says they've gone to far. They raise the portcullis, Trumpkin and the mice lower the drawbridge, and Edmund finally gets his flashlight to work. The Narnians rush into a slaughterhouse. Eventually they decide to retreat, but one of Miraz's men cut the rope for the portcullis. One minotaur had the sense to hold it up, but no one else had the sense to help him. So the portcullis comes crashing down with only half of their troops making it through. Edmund is cornered in his tower, but uses his flashlight as a bar to keep the door from opening for a few seconds. He is saved by his gryphon.
Back at Aslan's How, Caspian blames Peter for the disaster, and Peter blames Caspian. Caspian goes down in the basement to angst. Nikabrik seizes hold of this and introduces Caspian to the hag and the werewolf. They've found Jadis's wand somehow, even though Edmund broke it, and use it to summon up an ice portal. Jadis appears behind it and reaches her hand through the ice, saying she only needs the blood of Adam to be restored. She says she'll grant him all the power he needs to take back his throne. Peter and Edmund burst in and fight the evil three. Peter breaks through and stops Caspian before it's too late, but he himself starts to get tempted. He's about to succumb when suddenly the ice wall shatters. Edmund had snuck up from behind and stabbed Jadis in the back. My inner Edmund fangirl was very happy with that.
Anyways, the three makeup. They agree that the only way to win is to find Aslan. Meanwhile, Miraz crowns himself king, gets a swishy cloak, finishes the bridge across Beruna, and gets his army on the edge of the field around Aslan's How. Lucy agrees to go find Aslan, and Susan says she'll come with her. The Pevensie boys finally decide to get the movie back on track by giving Edmund the letter to give to Miraz about challenging Peter. They use this to keep the attention off of Susan and Lucy as the prepare to escape. Susan and Caspian flirt a bit before they're off. Miraz agrees to the challenge and the battle between Peter and Miraz begins.
Lucy and Susan are still attack though, and Susan leaps off, sending Lucy on alone. Susan manages to kill all of their pursuers with her bow except one. Then Caspian jumps out of nowhere and saves her. They ride back to Aslan's How together. The battle between Peter and Miraz continues. Caspian and Susan return and P&M take a break. They go back into the ring after a brief pep talk and Peter wins. Miraz says to just kill him, but Peter says that that decision belongs to Caspian. Caspian refuses as well, and Miraz start to limp back to his own men. One of his generals sticks and arrow in him though and claims it was the Narnians. The final battle begins.
Meanwhile. Lucy meets Aslan. He roars and the trees come to life. Back in the final battle, the Narnians do the cool thing where they make the ground collapse underneath the weight of the Telmarines, but there are just too many. Caspian's about to get killed when a giant tree root saves him. The trees start attacking and the Telmarines retreat. They run back through the plains and into the forest. In the next scene at the river, they're still running. Even though there's a mountain in the direction where they were running from. Magic tunnels, I swear. Anyways, they get to the river and the bridge with the Narnians coming through the magic tunnel right behind them. Across the bridge is Lucy and Aslan. They snicker and charge across... until Aslan roars. Suddenly, the river god comes out of nowhere and bashes their army to shreds.
Everybody cheers, Reepicheep discovers his tail is lost and gets it returned and everyone is happy. Even the colors of Miraz's town/castle get a face lift! :D
The next morning, Peter and Susan are looking downcast as they talk with Aslan. Caspian calls out to them, but they have to go to the town square. A gap in a tree's roots is turned into the magical gateway, and from there on out the movie pretty much ends the same way as the book... but with one big difference.
Caspian and Susan start making out after she says she'll never be coming back to Narnia.
Then the Pevensies walk through the portal home to the tune of a really bad pop/rock song. They all get on the train together, and Edmund laments the fact that his new torch/flashlight is still back in Narnia.
The End.