Nonexistant Nest
Wow.
I just got kicked out of my parents' house.
Details later perhaps, but I suppose it may have happened sooner or later. Mom expressed to me it wasn't merely the problem that was discussed that brought things to this point, but it also was just time, given my age. I'm grateful at least, that things have not ended on a totally sour note. She said she hoped I'd still come back to visit, and that she still loved me. That she'd always love me. While in my heart I know that's true, it was still beautiful to hear after a lot of upset and heated arguments with little room to question the authority on whose points were valid, given that I am their daughter, and they are my parents. As such, there are times you haven't much say in some matters as much as you may very fervently believe in and hold fast to your views. This absolutely frustrates me to no end.
I haven't really anywhere else to go, apart from the obvious. The obvious being, staying with my beloved, James, in his small, cluttered, studio apartment. I wonder what he'll think about all this once I tell him later this morning. I knew I wanted to move in with him at some point, and the feeling is definately mutual, but I obviously hadn't thought it would be quite in this way. I'd hoped to build a significantly larger "warchest", or, amount of funds to sit on, and live on, after paying back some considerable debts. There was also talk from dad about paying some rent, and giving back a little when able, but I guess now it won't be rent. Still, I would like to help when I can. I mean shit, I only owe them my life. Money comes and goes, but like it or not, they won't be around forever.
I'm fairly reluctant yet eager to hear dad's take on this as well. I haven't seen too much of him lately, and that sort of gets to me. I'm wondering when I'll next see him. I wish we could talk right now, but it wouldn't do to do so over the phone while he's at work. Besides, this isn't one of those things to be done in any other way than face to face.
Augh. I was so very tired some hours ago, particularly in light of the extreme heat here lately, but now I find it difficult to sleep. Nonetheless, this certainly helped. It feels really good to write again somewhat consistantly.
(4:00AM)
I just got kicked out of my parents' house.
Details later perhaps, but I suppose it may have happened sooner or later. Mom expressed to me it wasn't merely the problem that was discussed that brought things to this point, but it also was just time, given my age. I'm grateful at least, that things have not ended on a totally sour note. She said she hoped I'd still come back to visit, and that she still loved me. That she'd always love me. While in my heart I know that's true, it was still beautiful to hear after a lot of upset and heated arguments with little room to question the authority on whose points were valid, given that I am their daughter, and they are my parents. As such, there are times you haven't much say in some matters as much as you may very fervently believe in and hold fast to your views. This absolutely frustrates me to no end.
I haven't really anywhere else to go, apart from the obvious. The obvious being, staying with my beloved, James, in his small, cluttered, studio apartment. I wonder what he'll think about all this once I tell him later this morning. I knew I wanted to move in with him at some point, and the feeling is definately mutual, but I obviously hadn't thought it would be quite in this way. I'd hoped to build a significantly larger "warchest", or, amount of funds to sit on, and live on, after paying back some considerable debts. There was also talk from dad about paying some rent, and giving back a little when able, but I guess now it won't be rent. Still, I would like to help when I can. I mean shit, I only owe them my life. Money comes and goes, but like it or not, they won't be around forever.
I'm fairly reluctant yet eager to hear dad's take on this as well. I haven't seen too much of him lately, and that sort of gets to me. I'm wondering when I'll next see him. I wish we could talk right now, but it wouldn't do to do so over the phone while he's at work. Besides, this isn't one of those things to be done in any other way than face to face.
Augh. I was so very tired some hours ago, particularly in light of the extreme heat here lately, but now I find it difficult to sleep. Nonetheless, this certainly helped. It feels really good to write again somewhat consistantly.
(4:00AM)